What to do...

[grcsftbll]

You sure hope so but, if not, roll with the new and don't look back. It is what it is and it sounds like your way better off. Keep you head up and don't let DD see your frustrations.


Thanks for sharing! We are back playing for a coach that could have been really upset w us for Leaving but he was super chill about it and here we are again. . His attitude about us leaving is what brought us back

Ditto! We left after 8U to play on a higher level team. Had a pretty crappy year, this year we went back. He and DH have coached together all year and it's been pretty great.

 

[KPower]

Wow just had the mom of the 2nd baseman from DD's old team text me. They left - this is why...

HC picked up 2 new middle infielders and she (the returning player of 2 yrs) would have to work her way back into the rotation. She would be OF until then. She has never played OF - SS and 2nd only. And she is the bomb! Where is this loyalty he spoke to me about not having!?!

How can he *know* these 2 pick ups are studs when he saw them for 2 hours and they only fielded balls that they KNEW were beimg hit to them? Ugh!

On another note I am very sad for the new pitcher on the team - she is telling everyone how excited she is to throw to DD. They worked together the night of tryouts and really connected. I would never intentionally sabotage the team and tell her - but I still feel bad.

 

[Strike2]

Wow just had the mom of the 2nd baseman from DD's old team text me. They left - this is why...

HC picked up 2 new middle infielders and she (the returning player of 2 yrs) would have to work her way back into the rotation. She would be OF until then. She has never played OF - SS and 2nd only. And she is the bomb! Where is this loyalty he spoke to me about not having!?!

How can he *know* these 2 pick ups are studs when he saw them for 2 hours and they only fielded balls that they KNEW were beimg hit to them? Ugh!

On another note I am very sad for the new pitcher on the team - she is telling everyone how excited she is to throw to DD. They worked together the night of tryouts and really connected. I would never intentionally sabotage the team and tell her - but I still feel bad.

I'd be far more concerned about the earlier comment you made about him cutting the daughter of an AC by email. That's not just a lack of loyalty, it's the mark of a first-rate A-hole. Anyway...

If the 2B was really getting it done, then the HC made a stupid move IF, as you heard, he told her she'd have to re-earn her way into in the rotation. That said, competition for positions isn't at all a bad thing, and if the kid has never played OF, her coaches have done her a gross disservice. As kids get older, OF becomes ever more important, and flexibility is a great asset. EVERYONE on my kid's team plays OF. Some do it better than others, and it isn't my kid's best spot, but nothing fires me up more than when when she does well there.

Best of luck with the new team. I hope it works out for your kid.

 

[Easton33]

I really can't believe what I have read on here. Then again, I guess I can. So a family friend has coached your daughter for 4 years and you "think" the team is going to become stagnate so you jumped ship. Loyalty, appreciation, common courtesy, whatever you want to call it, it should have kept you there. For four years he has kept your daughter progressing in a sport, working with her, and giving her the opportunity to get better whereas I am confident noone there would. You shopped her around and everyone said OF....why was he playing her at catcher? Probably because when you came on he did it has a favor and then she got good enough to actually be the catcher. You jumped ship on this guy after he stayed with you and your daughter. Now when it sounds like he needs you the most, you bailed on him. Proud parent moment there. Don't stick with the ones that stuck with you when you weren't the best, dump them when things look better for you elsewhere. The people that left could very well have left because of his long term 4 year player leaving.
Coaches are loyal to usually 4 or 5 core girls and then they dismiss the others at will. Parents and players are usually loyal has long as they don't have a better offer. After 4 years sound like he has proved his loyalty. Colleges look at individual players, not team wins or losses, I don't think it showed very much character to up and leave. If she is that good, she would have no problem finding a team to play with. I think I can show you how loyal he was. 13 years old, 80 lbs. He had 40 girls tryout but he kept your DD? What most catchers do besides catch is hit. Traditionally, catchers will be you power hitters. So out of 40 girls, do you really think he could not find a catcher that is a righty that has more muscle or size that can hit the ball further and harder or throw a ball harder? I bet he could. Wonder why he was keeping her? LOYALTY. All of this is JMO but these people that are agreeing with you are mostly parents that have done the same thing. After 4 years, I think he has earned an opportunity to make a few mistakes and still keep his players. Within 2 years your DD will probably be OF only. She is 13/80lbs, she is too small to catch for A teams so you should have stayed put and let her keep working at catcher until her size catches up with her. Instead she will be in the OF for 2 years and miss some good experience that could propel her to the next level. Sorry I am ranting. Can you tell I just lost a player I have spent literally hundreds (400+) games with? She got her full ride offer and since she has that she is abandoning the team, to be a pickup. Nothing personal, I was just giving you a different perspective.

 

[ang2bmd]

Totally disagree with Easton. I am fully committed to the team my kids are playing with each year, but each year is it's own. Teams change, situations change, girls personalities and skill sets change. My job as a parent is to help her each year find the best situation for her to grow personally as a player. Sometimes that means staying...sometimes it means going. It's nothing personal.

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[Easton33]

Totally disagree with Easton. I am �� fully committed to the team my kids are playing with each year, but each year is it's own. Teams change, situations change, girls personalities and skill sets change. My job as a parent is to help her each year find the best situation for her to grow personally as a player. Sometimes that means staying...sometimes it means going. It's nothing personal.

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You my friend are the dreaded team hopper. Everyone smiles and says hello but if you are switching teams every year, there will be some doors closing for you. You will not
be the player that rolls off the coaches tongue when he is talking to colleges about his players. But honestly I don't disagree with you fully. The difference to me is paying organizations vs the family friend or the guy volunteering. I think that is a big distinction, family friend...probably shouldn't have gotten in that situation to start with but now that you are you should stick.
You may disagree 100% with some of my post but you disagree with second paragraph too?

 

[Rocketech1]

I really can't believe what I have read on here. Then again, I guess I can. So a family friend has coached your daughter for 4 years and you "think" the team is going to become stagnate so you jumped ship. Loyalty, appreciation, common courtesy, whatever you want to call it, it should have kept you there. For four years he has kept your daughter progressing in a sport, working with her, and giving her the opportunity to get better whereas I am confident noone there would. You shopped her around and everyone said OF....why was he playing her at catcher? Probably because when you came on he did it has a favor and then she got good enough to actually be the catcher. You jumped ship on this guy after he stayed with you and your daughter. Now when it sounds like he needs you the most, you bailed on him. Proud parent moment there. Don't stick with the ones that stuck with you when you weren't the best, dump them when things look better for you elsewhere. The people that left could very well have left because of his long term 4 year player leaving.
Coaches are loyal to usually 4 or 5 core girls and then they dismiss the others at will. Parents and players are usually loyal has long as they don't have a better offer. After 4 years sound like he has proved his loyalty. Colleges look at individual players, not team wins or losses, I don't think it showed very much character to up and leave. If she is that good, she would have no problem finding a team to play with. I think I can show you how loyal he was. 13 years old, 80 lbs. He had 40 girls tryout but he kept your DD? What most catchers do besides catch is hit. Traditionally, catchers will be you power hitters. So out of 40 girls, do you really think he could not find a catcher that is a righty that has more muscle or size that can hit the ball further and harder or throw a ball harder? I bet he could. Wonder why he was keeping her? LOYALTY. All of this is JMO but these people that are agreeing with you are mostly parents that have done the same thing. After 4 years, I think he has earned an opportunity to make a few mistakes and still keep his players. Within 2 years your DD will probably be OF only. She is 13/80lbs, she is too small to catch for A teams so you should have stayed put and let her keep working at catcher until her size catches up with her. Instead she will be in the OF for 2 years and miss some good experience that could propel her to the next level. Sorry I am ranting. Can you tell I just lost a player I have spent literally hundreds (400+) games with? She got her full ride offer and since she has that she is abandoning the team, to be a pickup. Nothing personal, I was just giving you a different perspective.

Disagree. Loyalty doesn't mean staying on a team that is not giving your DD what she needs to grow as a softball player. If you are a good coach you shouldn't have to beg players to come back, they should be breaking down your door to play for you. How long should the OP's DD stay with this team 1 more year, 3 more years, through high school? She fulfilled her season commitment and has branched out to see what else is available. I think this is a smart move that should be done each and every year by ALL players. If the current program meets her needs she stays, if not, she goes elsewhere. Coaches that have been around the block know this is the way things are done not only in softball but all sports.

 

[Easton33]

Disagree. Loyalty doesn't mean staying on a team that is not giving your DD what she needs to grow as a softball player. If you are a good coach you shouldn't have to beg players to come back, they should be breaking down your door to play for you. How long should the OP's DD stay with this team 1 more year, 3 more years, through high school? She fulfilled her season commitment and has branched out to see what else is available. I think this is a smart move that should be done each and every year by ALL players. If the current program meets her needs she stays, if not, she goes elsewhere. Coaches that have been around the block know this is the way things are done not only in softball but all sports.

Not if she wants to be a catcher. Pitchers pitch, catchers don't play outfield, they catch. I actually do have players waiting to play for me so not sure that was knock on me or the other guy.

 

[Easton33]

Disagree. Loyalty doesn't mean staying on a team that is not giving your DD what she needs to grow as a softball player. If you are a good coach you shouldn't have to beg players to come back, they should be breaking down your door to play for you. How long should the OP's DD stay with this team 1 more year, 3 more years, through high school? She fulfilled her season commitment and has branched out to see what else is available. I think this is a smart move that should be done each and every year by ALL players. If the current program meets her needs she stays, if not, she goes elsewhere. Coaches that have been around the block know this is the way things are done not only in softball but all sports.

So playing for a different team where she will be limited on catching time will?
I think she should have stayed for 2 reasons, loyalty and he actually was giving her what she needed in softball, experience at catcher. I guess there are a lot of "ifs" I didn't address. If playing rec or c ball, move up at all costs. If playing B and getting your catching time in, stay put. That is better than playing A ball as an outfielder, IMO.

 

[Rocketech1]

Travel softball is a competitive and cutthroat business but a player should not be compelled to stay on any team just because the head coaches dad is friends with the players dad. I have seen too many teams that keep the same core players for years and the players and coaches get too comfortable with the team dynamics and the softball skills never fully develop. There is something unique about earning the right to play on a team that holds tryout and the possibility you may be cut every year. In addition, every player on a team should have to earn playing time. These daddy ball teams, by definition, can never cut a coaches kid or a kid who is friends of the family. This is why I am a huge advocate of playing on teams that have paid coaches that don't have family members as players. It's a totally different dynamic that is great for most players on these teams.

To OP, he stayed with this team for 4 years and his DD and he decided that they needed to move on. His "loyalty" to the team probably cost his DD a few years of developing other skills. I can't blame them for wanting to leave if they feel this is in the best interest of their child.