How to handle a parent?

[Nor831Cal]

There's always one! One of the moms from our TB always butts in during games after all parents have been told before the season not to talk to the kids during tournament games. This mom is always there making comment to her daughter about playing time and regarding E's that she has made during the playing time that she has had.
How would you go about it and what's a good approach to handle a mom like that?

 

[marriard]

Quiet chat about how if it happens again she will be asked to go sit way down the outfield fence or behind center field to avoid this temptation or she will have to watch from the parking lot.

We don't have any this year, but we have had as many as 5 parents watching the game from behind the center field fence for this and other similar reasons.

 

[AndyS]

There's always one! One of the moms from our TB always butts in during games after all parents have been told before the season not to talk to the kids during tournament games. This mom is always there making comment to her daughter about playing time and regarding E's that she has made during the playing time that she has had.
How would you go about it and what's a good approach to handle a mom like that?

An approach I have used in the past is:

1) Acknowledge the temptation to talk to her DD during the game. Say something like "I know there are situations that arise in the game that make it very tempting to come and chat with your DD during a game".

2) Remind her of the rule you communicated: "But remember before the season we discussed several rules and not talking to your DD during the game unless it is emergency is one."

3) Explain WHY the rule is important: "There are enough distractions during a softball game and we want the girls focused on the single voice of the coaches and their complete attention during the game. In my experience that is the way I get the most out of your DD and the team."

4) And finally explain the consequences of not following the rule in a polite but firm way.

Hope that helps.

 

[GreenArrow]

In all fairness

There's always one! One of the moms from our TB always butts in during games after all parents have been told before the season not to talk to the kids during tournament games. This mom is always there making comment to her daughter about playing time and regarding E's that she has made during the playing time that she has had.
How would you go about it and what's a good approach to handle a mom like that?

In all fairness

Consider why the parent feels the need for such communication. Are you holding up your end of the "agreement"? Have you effectively communicated your expectations to players\parents? Have they changed since the season started? Have you spelled out consequences for non-compliance?

Most of the time this type of situation is caused by over zealous parents, but not always...

 

[Nor831Cal]

Thanks guys.
We gave all the parents a softball agreement at the beginning of the TB season. Talking to players and or coaches was one of the rules. She in one of the girls mother that we picked up to get her ready for this fall-ball and summer of next year. Girl does get some playing time on Saturday. She may play half of one game then not play the second then she will play the other half of the 3rd game. It all depends on how strong the other teams are. Sometime she may play a full game or two. Mom baby's her to much I think. That's not good, I think.

 

[Nor831Cal]

We have 12 girls on the TB team we play all, but on Sundays we play the strongest. I think the mothers problem is that her kid does not play on Sundays.

 

[YOCOACH]

We have 12 girls on the TB team we play all, but on Sundays we play the strongest. I think the mothers problem is that her kid does not play on Sundays.

Although I usually play the best 9 on Sundays' I will try and get the other girls in whenever we are playing an inning where we are facing the bottom 4 batters of their order unless we're behind or they are an exceptionally good hitting team. Otherwise, I will occasionally use them as pinch runners for my slower players or even DP occasionally when we are way ahead.

 

[Doug Romrell]

There's always one! One of the moms from our TB always butts in during games after all parents have been told before the season not to talk to the kids during tournament games. This mom is always there making comment to her daughter about playing time and regarding E's that she has made during the playing time that she has had.
How would you go about it and what's a good approach to handle a mom like that?

I'm guessing that odds are this mom will not abide by your rule. At least that has been my experience. This is why you almost have to pick players according to parents, but that's hard to do.

 

[Huskerdu]

I was going to say the same thing as Cannonball. I have my parents sign the rules and I point to that, "You signed the rules and agreed to them." If parent does it again, I'd have the kid go sit with the parent outside the fence...or at least warn them that's what they'll do. Most kids are terrified of being embarrassed by their mom or dad so the kid will tell their parents.

 

[canyonjoe]

Warn the parent they are breaking the rules. In a small number of cases they might change.

As others have said, it likely won't do any good. I find more and more people who just think they rules are for everyone else.

People driving past the school on a cell phone not paying attention. My wife does girls scouts and asks for forms to be filled out by X date. Many do, but some just figure I can do it when I want. Dues are due on the first, I'll pay in the 10th. My boarding pass says group 5, but I'll just go up with group 1. I can park in the handicap spot for a few minutes.