Paying for DD to ride the bench....Not My Thing

[uncdrew]

Fair point about being asked to join the team. It tells me that the coach recognized (at a minimum) a potentially good player that fills a need. However, it's a big jump from asking how a coach envisions that a player will be used to demanding that she get a large majority of playing time.

Yeah, lots of red flags when asked to join a team. Especially mid-season.

My DD has some talent and we get asked often. It's flattering. But I've learned it does lead to a ton of questions. Some about the team, some about the coach, some about the Org, some about the other parents.

In those situations, I tend to think the grass is (almost) always greener with the team you're currently on. Plenty of exceptions, of course.

 

[Orange Socks]

Oh, boy. I was under the impression that your DD was an experienced TB player. When I was coaching 12U, there is ZERO chance I would agree with a parent's request/demand that their DD would play a majority of the innings in her favorite spot before she had proven herself at that level of competition, and proven herself to be better for the team than what we currently have. Even then, I have a hard time doing a sudden and drastic chop to a current player's game time who has been a hard-working and loyal team player. Most likely, even if I think your DD might develop into something better than what we have now, if you are demanding immediate changes to my team, it's likely I'll wish you luck elsewhere.

I am still trying to figure out why the OP thinks that his DD would be "riding the pine" if she were to join this team. It sounds as though his DD is just beginning her TB journey and is still developing on her brand new TB team. I am thinking this other coach was actually looking to improve his team, otherwise he would not have asked for them to consider joining the team. The coach thought she might be a good fit. Happens all the time right? I am also thinking this coach's team might be a lower level B team that might be struggling and needs some players....that will actually play! How many players actually "ride the pine" these days in TB? Not many. If so, those teams would cease to exist.

 

[radness]

Communication and approach are what stands out to me here.
To begin with, a coach approaching a parent a little bit of structure is helpful!
~ hi I am coach _____
I noticed your daughter's skill sets on the field.
We have a spot on our roster open. We have a well facilitated schedule and team guidelines. If you'd like to call and inquire further we can go over details and set up a time, if you like to come do a look see. ~

That way its a little more formal.
Not just an open ended comment like.
Do you want to come play for us?

Simple team standards nip things like this post quickly.
1. All defensive positions are earned.
2. Hitting is reviewed for performance.
3. Timely attendance to team functions is part of performance.



Agree with a previous poster commenting
About what words were used in this original post really put a slant on this.

 

[FP26]

The entire situation seems a bit odd to me, but that is probably just because my experience was dramatically different than the OP. I coached TB for 7 years and never once recruited a single player. We did traditional tryouts the first four years. Each year we would lose 2 or 3 players, so that is what we wanted to replace. Each year our team gradually became stronger and stronger. We developed quality depth that allowed us to be competitive at tournaments even if one or two of our players was not available. The final three years, we didn't even hold tryouts. We had enough players/parents reach out to us at that time of year, that we easily filled the open slots. We knew every player at our age group within a 30 mile radius, so we would fill our team based on the needs we had as well as the input of the players on our team. No one was added without the other players and coaches agreeing to it. I realize this system probably wouldn't work for everyone, but it worked well for us.

 

[Eric F]

I am still trying to figure out why the OP thinks that his DD would be "riding the pine" if she were to join this team. It sounds as though his DD is just beginning her TB journey and is still developing on her brand new TB team. I am thinking this other coach was actually looking to improve his team, otherwise he would not have asked for them to consider joining the team. The coach thought she might be a good fit. Happens all the time right? I am also thinking this coach's team might be a lower level B team that might be struggling and needs some players....that will actually play! How many players actually "ride the pine" these days in TB? Not many. If so, those teams would cease to exist.

Another thing that should be considered is that it's not a black/white scenario. The choices aren't only 1) all the playing time, or 2) no playing time. There are also a ton of variables that may affect the situation on a game-by-game basis, and some days may be better than others.

 

[OsDad]

I am still trying to figure out why the OP thinks that his DD would be "riding the pine" if she were to join this team.

My assumption was that he's seen his daughter play, and has seen this team play. If it's anything in his area like it is here, I've seen virtually every mid-level B team to A team in the state many times and have good idea how/if my own kid would fit on their teams if they came calling (which is not at all on some of them- I absolutely wouldn't put her on some because she wouldn't see the field EVER).

... I am thinking this other coach was actually looking to improve his team, otherwise he would not have asked for them to consider joining the team.

...How many players actually "ride the pine" these days in TB? Not many. If so, those teams would cease to exist.

We must have VERY different TB coaches and teams here than in your part of Texas, if you don't have TB coaches who have kids at the ends of their benches to don't play often and who recruit to improve the ends of their benches (and have no intention of playing them much- they're insurance policies).

 

[Northball]

...And runs her mouth constantly from the stands any time her daughter is not pitching. What's worse is it's "almost" as bad when she IS pitching. Constant comments about calls and defense and how her daughter is "the only one trying"! It's absolutely ridiculous. They've alienated themselves around here from just about every "good" team because all she does is cause problems and everyone says the same thing, "they'd LOVE To have the player but dealing with mom makes it a hard pass..."

I think we may have a an opportunity for Pattar to start a "Parent Coach" business. Teaching parents the benefits of watching games from left field, reducing their blood pressure, and lowering the stress levels in their kids. In extreme cases, watching from the car with the windows up so no one can hear them scream.

 

[tamss13]

I am still trying to figure out why the OP thinks that his DD would be "riding the pine" if she were to join this team. It sounds as though his DD is just beginning her TB journey and is still developing on her brand new TB team. I am thinking this other coach was actually looking to improve his team, otherwise he would not have asked for them to consider joining the team. The coach thought she might be a good fit. Happens all the time right? I am also thinking this coach's team might be a lower level B team that might be struggling and needs some players....that will actually play! How many players actually "ride the pine" these days in TB? Not many. If so, those teams would cease to exist.

To answer your question:

My DD is new to catching. Really new to catching and she is developing. She looks like she has played the position for years, but she is not technically sound and needs more work (My Opinion). I believe she needs more game time experience.

Going to a new team to wait your turn at 12U I don't agree with. They have a good catcher she would be there to push the back up. I don't want to pay for her being the 3rd catcher when she is already in a good place.

before you ask: Yes she plays other positions SS and CF was her favorites and primaries until she tried catcher and fell in love with it.

 

[radness]

To answer your question:

My DD is new to catching. Really new to catching and she is developing. She looks like she has played the position for years, but she is not technically sound and needs more work (My Opinion). I believe she needs more game time experience.

Going to a new team to wait your turn at 12U I don't agree with. They have a good catcher she would be there to push the back up. I don't want to pay for her being the 3rd catcher when she is already in a good place.

before you ask: Yes she plays other positions SS and CF was her favorites and primaries until she tried catcher and fell in love with it.

Catching is fun!

What is your new playing time breakdown for her
ie: 33.33333% at ss, cf & catcher.

How many catchers now on the team?

 

[bmakj]

definitely do not be a 3rd catcher on a team, unless it is not your first choice for position. DD left a team she was 3rd catcher on. Ideally, 3rd C would be someone who has caught, can do the job if need be, but is no clamoring for innings behind the plate, but has another primary position. C time on a tournament team should breack down something like 55/35/10, and if needed that last number can be lower, ie throw them 1 or 2 innings in bracket play every weekend just to keep hand in.