Originally posted by Cory McLaughlin at the WA State Fastpitch Page:
These thoughts popped into my head today so I jotted this down. Hope it helps bring perspective.
There is no future in softball. The game does not carry any hopes for a multi million dollar contract or even a living wage for that matter. For the time being, softball is a game for young women with the best wish of not much more than a scholarship to a school you may or may not want to attend.
So why play? Why pay? Why invest time into something that is finite and will, for the majority of players, cost more than it will ever pay out monetarily?
I’ve seen lists on here before in one form or another. While I’m sure what I’m about to say is similar I write this to explain what it is to me.
I have coached my daughter since she was 7 years old only just stepping away recently. She is now a freshman in high school. We have done rec, travel, and high school ball. She has been on several teams and had tons of teammates. It has been a ride for sure and it’s not over yet.
The Bad:
We have had some tough times. We have had awful coaches, mean teammates, injury and financial strain. We have cried and we have dealt with anger and rage. We have lived and suffered through the bad. We have lost. So why do it?
Because losing is part of life. It is an essential life skill to learn to deal with loss, anger, disappointment, hurt feelings, and all the other bad things that life can throw at you. You can try and hide from the bad in the world but it’s always there waiting to jump up and slap you in the face.
Oddly, the bad is as essential as the good. The bad brings balance, which is what the REAL world looks like. It’s just a push and pull of good and bad. Understanding how to appropriately deal with the bad only helps to bring about more good.
The Good:
I look at my 14 year old daughter as she sleeps in the passenger seat on our hour drive to another early morning practice. I admire her commitment though I’m sure she would rather be in bed. I rejoice in the fact that she is learning one of the most important lessons in life which is simply to get up and go when everything in you wants to stay in bed. This is how it feels for most of us everyday we go to work.
I see her on the field working hard for herself and for her teammates. Laughing and sometimes crying together depending on how the games went. I see her learning to form bonds with a diverse group of people and I applaud those moments as this is also an essential life skill.
I see her injured, hurt, tired, and mentally beat down. I see her find away to work through these issues and remain positive. I see her find a way to be helpful even when she is not 100%. I see her putting team in front of “Me” and that is also essential in the real world.
I see her endure horrible coaches that treat her poorly or just don’t believe in her. I see her have conversations with them and I see her advocate for herself. I see a young woman not afraid to know her worth and not afraid to leave a toxic relationship. I see her work to find what she deserves.
I see work ethic and determination to be as good as she can be. I see accountability in its truest form knowing that her failures are her own as are her successes, and that either way those may have helped or hurt her team. I see her understand that excuses and blame don’t get you anywhere in this life and ownership and accountability are what is necessary for positive growth. This is a big one, and something that I always tried to coach.
I see my money go to so much more than a game. I’m paying for life and it’s lessons. I’m paying for my daughter to learn to be a good hardworking and responsible human. I see return on my investment every time she steps on that field and when she is off of it.
I see time. I see myself in a car with a 14 year old girl day in and day out talking about life, boys, friends, softball, music. I see bonding with my daughter while so many others I know struggle to find common ground with their children. I see trust because my daughter knows I will listen, love, coach, guide, and work to understand her no matter the topic. I see memories that will never fade.
Lastly I see family. I see a sister showing up to a game she is not interested in. A mom freezing in the chill of spring to cheer on her baby. I see road trips and more hotel stays than I can count. I see plane rides that we never expected to take. I see making the most out of every trip no matter the outcome of the tournament. I see a family turning sport into an adventure and growing together as it unfolds. I see life, and life is for living.
No, there is not a future in softball. There will most certainly not be a big payout in the end as measured by dollar signs. But, I will have a relationship, memories, life lessons and quality time with a girl that means the world to me. So, it IS worth it! 10 years from now my only regret will be that it is over and that I miss it in all its beauty. The good and the bad.
So there it is. There may not be a future in softball in the way some people think, but it certainly is not without purpose. Softball teaches lessons about life. So for those of us that love it and understand it, softball is life, and it’s a beautiful life indeed.
~Cory McLaughlin
Softball Dad and Coach
These thoughts popped into my head today so I jotted this down. Hope it helps bring perspective.
There is no future in softball. The game does not carry any hopes for a multi million dollar contract or even a living wage for that matter. For the time being, softball is a game for young women with the best wish of not much more than a scholarship to a school you may or may not want to attend.
So why play? Why pay? Why invest time into something that is finite and will, for the majority of players, cost more than it will ever pay out monetarily?
I’ve seen lists on here before in one form or another. While I’m sure what I’m about to say is similar I write this to explain what it is to me.
I have coached my daughter since she was 7 years old only just stepping away recently. She is now a freshman in high school. We have done rec, travel, and high school ball. She has been on several teams and had tons of teammates. It has been a ride for sure and it’s not over yet.
The Bad:
We have had some tough times. We have had awful coaches, mean teammates, injury and financial strain. We have cried and we have dealt with anger and rage. We have lived and suffered through the bad. We have lost. So why do it?
Because losing is part of life. It is an essential life skill to learn to deal with loss, anger, disappointment, hurt feelings, and all the other bad things that life can throw at you. You can try and hide from the bad in the world but it’s always there waiting to jump up and slap you in the face.
Oddly, the bad is as essential as the good. The bad brings balance, which is what the REAL world looks like. It’s just a push and pull of good and bad. Understanding how to appropriately deal with the bad only helps to bring about more good.
The Good:
I look at my 14 year old daughter as she sleeps in the passenger seat on our hour drive to another early morning practice. I admire her commitment though I’m sure she would rather be in bed. I rejoice in the fact that she is learning one of the most important lessons in life which is simply to get up and go when everything in you wants to stay in bed. This is how it feels for most of us everyday we go to work.
I see her on the field working hard for herself and for her teammates. Laughing and sometimes crying together depending on how the games went. I see her learning to form bonds with a diverse group of people and I applaud those moments as this is also an essential life skill.
I see her injured, hurt, tired, and mentally beat down. I see her find away to work through these issues and remain positive. I see her find a way to be helpful even when she is not 100%. I see her putting team in front of “Me” and that is also essential in the real world.
I see her endure horrible coaches that treat her poorly or just don’t believe in her. I see her have conversations with them and I see her advocate for herself. I see a young woman not afraid to know her worth and not afraid to leave a toxic relationship. I see her work to find what she deserves.
I see work ethic and determination to be as good as she can be. I see accountability in its truest form knowing that her failures are her own as are her successes, and that either way those may have helped or hurt her team. I see her understand that excuses and blame don’t get you anywhere in this life and ownership and accountability are what is necessary for positive growth. This is a big one, and something that I always tried to coach.
I see my money go to so much more than a game. I’m paying for life and it’s lessons. I’m paying for my daughter to learn to be a good hardworking and responsible human. I see return on my investment every time she steps on that field and when she is off of it.
I see time. I see myself in a car with a 14 year old girl day in and day out talking about life, boys, friends, softball, music. I see bonding with my daughter while so many others I know struggle to find common ground with their children. I see trust because my daughter knows I will listen, love, coach, guide, and work to understand her no matter the topic. I see memories that will never fade.
Lastly I see family. I see a sister showing up to a game she is not interested in. A mom freezing in the chill of spring to cheer on her baby. I see road trips and more hotel stays than I can count. I see plane rides that we never expected to take. I see making the most out of every trip no matter the outcome of the tournament. I see a family turning sport into an adventure and growing together as it unfolds. I see life, and life is for living.
No, there is not a future in softball. There will most certainly not be a big payout in the end as measured by dollar signs. But, I will have a relationship, memories, life lessons and quality time with a girl that means the world to me. So, it IS worth it! 10 years from now my only regret will be that it is over and that I miss it in all its beauty. The good and the bad.
So there it is. There may not be a future in softball in the way some people think, but it certainly is not without purpose. Softball teaches lessons about life. So for those of us that love it and understand it, softball is life, and it’s a beautiful life indeed.
~Cory McLaughlin
Softball Dad and Coach
