I think at 7 they are still figuring out what is really important to them. DD played select soccer (year round) and travel softball both until she was 11 (last year). We had a few scheduling conflicts, but nothing too major. She would always choose softball over soccer, and it wasn't really fair to her soccer coach or team. On top of that my oldest boy was getting to the age where he wanted to get more involved in sports, and it was a logistical mess for DW and myself. She was a great soccer player, but gave it up to focus more on softball, because that is what she loves to do. That being said she does run track in the spring and took intramural archery last winter at her middle school.
To Club or Not to Club....
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Agreed! We just finished up this Spring's soccer season. We made every practice except 1 or 2, and made every game but 1. All while playing softball and doing gymnastics. She missed the 1st three innings of 1 softball game, but that was it. Gymnastics took a hit, but she isn't on a team - just classes.
I want to be very upfront with the club soccer teams, so that they know what they're getting. A girl that plays till she drops, and will be there as long as there's not another game conflict. And if there's conflicts, we try to choose evenly over the season, so no one continually gets the shaft.
I was just kind of taken-a-back on his stance for a U9 team. I forgot to mention that he also said "if she'd like to pursue other sports, she has the summer or winter." Didn't really expect that, but, I respect his honesty.
I agree that your DD is too young to chooose a sport.
If your DD wants to be "good", she will have to choose a sport. The usual time to "choose" is when the child starts high school.
When the kid starts high school.
At 7YOA, yes the coach should.
At 14YOA, the kid has to specialize in one sport. The problem is that there are travel/club programs for all sports. These programs are primarily in the summer. The competition level is very high on these travel/club teams. Not surprisingly, kids who play travel/club programs surpass kids who don't.
For your child to be "good", she has to play on a high level travel/club team. High level travel/club teams insist that a child play for that team during the summer. They don't tolerate kids missing games or practices.
Again, at your child's age, she should play a variety of sports. At some point, she will pick a sport, but that is down the road a few yars.
If your DD wants to be "good", she will have to choose a sport. The usual time to "choose" is when the child starts high school.
When the kid starts high school.
At 7YOA, yes the coach should.
At 14YOA, the kid has to specialize in one sport. The problem is that there are travel/club programs for all sports. These programs are primarily in the summer. The competition level is very high on these travel/club teams. Not surprisingly, kids who play travel/club programs surpass kids who don't.
For your child to be "good", she has to play on a high level travel/club team. High level travel/club teams insist that a child play for that team during the summer. They don't tolerate kids missing games or practices.
Again, at your child's age, she should play a variety of sports. At some point, she will pick a sport, but that is down the road a few yars.
- Aug 12, 2014
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I don't see anything wrong with him wanting your DD to make his team the top priority. And as you said, he made his expectation very clear and gave you and DD the opportunity to decide if it's the right team for her.
I am all in favor of playing multiple sports if the kid wants to play multiple sports. At the same time, if you are going to play on multiple teams at the same time, you need to make it clear to the coaches of the various teams up front and let them know what your priority will be in the event of conflicts. This allows the coach to explain his/her policy for missed practices and games, and also gives the coach the opportunity to turn the player down if this team will be the player's second or third priority.
I coach DS' baseball team. It's a club team but we play at the AA/rec level, just league play, no tourneys. I have one player on the team who plays soccer and also plays on his school baseball team, and we are his third priority. We've had 9 games so far and he has missed 4 and was late to another, and he's missed about half the practices and was late to some others. If I had known this up front, I would not have taken him, especially given that our club had several players who they were unable to place on a team, and we might have been their first priority.
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My DD (12yo) plays 3 club/competitive sports. Soccer, softball and basketball. She has done this for the past 3 years. Basketball isn't really a problem. DD's team essentially goes dark from March to Sept to allow for other sports. Soccer and softball have alot of conflicts. This year DD missed one soccer game in the fall and one in the spring. She missed 2 softball games each season as well. Thankfully DD's softball coach planned his practices on nights she didn't have soccer so practice nights rarely conclicted. It is hard, but we make it work. it is frustrating when someone accuses DD of being uncommitted - as far as I'm concerned she is more committed because it takes more of a sacrifice for her to make everything. She is the fastest base runner on her TB team. She has amazing lateral movement as a catcher and she can jump up and grab an overthrown ball at 1st base unlike anyone I've seen. I think she is able to do all of this because of the training she gets in other sports. She has also learned to respond to differing coaching styles and she plays different roles on every team she plays on. I am proud of how hard she works and what a coachable kid she is.
I am concerned because she has to change soccer teams this year and we know nothing about the possible coaches. I know she is being considered for the top soccer team in her club. As much as I know that is where her skill level lies, I also know that we are not in a position to travel out of state durong basketball season. For this reason we will not accept a position on that team. She will probably accept a position on the 2nd team - they do not travel out of state. I feel like we try to take all factors into consideration when accepting positions on a team. Thankfully she has spots on a strong TB softball team and basketball team both of which encourage her in her pursuits of multiple sports. As a matter of fact her coaches have even come to watch her play other sports.
At 7 there is no way a child should be forced to chose. I know DD's time is probably getting close...but we are going to encourage playing multiple sports as long as we can.
I am concerned because she has to change soccer teams this year and we know nothing about the possible coaches. I know she is being considered for the top soccer team in her club. As much as I know that is where her skill level lies, I also know that we are not in a position to travel out of state durong basketball season. For this reason we will not accept a position on that team. She will probably accept a position on the 2nd team - they do not travel out of state. I feel like we try to take all factors into consideration when accepting positions on a team. Thankfully she has spots on a strong TB softball team and basketball team both of which encourage her in her pursuits of multiple sports. As a matter of fact her coaches have even come to watch her play other sports.
At 7 there is no way a child should be forced to chose. I know DD's time is probably getting close...but we are going to encourage playing multiple sports as long as we can.
Something a coach I know posted on Facebook.
- Aug 6, 2013
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I believe playing different sports is definitely beneficial to the kids but when the sports are all in the same season I have to ask how are these kids not being burnt out also?
We have a rule in our house - one sport at a time. We live in Kansas so softball goes dark from November to after Christmas - then team practice starts up indoors once a week and games start again in April. During that off time my daughter plays basketball at a rec level. She has to play rec because any other team around here that is more serious is a year around team which she can't do. We made the mistake of putting her on a club team last November and it was painfully obvious my dd couldn't hang and she hated playing. I moved her to a rec team in January and she was so much happier.
My rule is mostly for my sanity. I have 3 kids and a husband that travels 50% or more for work. He is also in a job that he has to be "on call" so relying on him for transportation is not possible so I do everything. When dd was 8 she played volleyball, softball and basketball all at the same time and I think I almost went insane. My boys were in boy scouts so weekends were taken up with game and camp outs (because I am also scout mom). I worked full time and then spent every single evening shuttling from practice to practice to game and everything always conflicted. That is my Murphy's Rule - if she is in 2 activities at one time they will ALWAYS conflict. I was going crazy and after that I said - no more. One sport a season, period.
Now she is starting middle school next year. 6th graders can't play volleyball or basketball but they can run track. All middle school sports are immediately after school so we should be able to swing playing and still participating in softball. Once she gets into High School she will be driving and I will be much happier. She will be in charge of her own scheduling - she just needs to understand that grades will ALWAYS come first!
We have a rule in our house - one sport at a time. We live in Kansas so softball goes dark from November to after Christmas - then team practice starts up indoors once a week and games start again in April. During that off time my daughter plays basketball at a rec level. She has to play rec because any other team around here that is more serious is a year around team which she can't do. We made the mistake of putting her on a club team last November and it was painfully obvious my dd couldn't hang and she hated playing. I moved her to a rec team in January and she was so much happier.
My rule is mostly for my sanity. I have 3 kids and a husband that travels 50% or more for work. He is also in a job that he has to be "on call" so relying on him for transportation is not possible so I do everything. When dd was 8 she played volleyball, softball and basketball all at the same time and I think I almost went insane. My boys were in boy scouts so weekends were taken up with game and camp outs (because I am also scout mom). I worked full time and then spent every single evening shuttling from practice to practice to game and everything always conflicted. That is my Murphy's Rule - if she is in 2 activities at one time they will ALWAYS conflict. I was going crazy and after that I said - no more. One sport a season, period.
Now she is starting middle school next year. 6th graders can't play volleyball or basketball but they can run track. All middle school sports are immediately after school so we should be able to swing playing and still participating in softball. Once she gets into High School she will be driving and I will be much happier. She will be in charge of her own scheduling - she just needs to understand that grades will ALWAYS come first!
Keeping it simple - our house one sport per child per season (as others have said). Keep a watchful eye through the years for various signs of stress. Be ready for your heartbreak when they choose a different sport than you would. Release them to that sport and let them own it! My college softball player took a year of in MS and when she returned it was her sport - not mine.
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I saw an article recently in a local paper:
U of Wisconsin researchers recently published some findings: kids who play the SAME sport 12 months out of the year have far more injuries than kids who play multiple sports, and do not play any sport more than 8 months out of the year. The researchers say they have no idea when it is OK to specialize, but they do know specializing too young is dangerous.
Lots of kids don't know what sport they want to play until fairly late, anyway. DS took up rowing as a sophomore in HS for cross-training with track. He never went back to track and now rows in college. A girl from another HS in the same city took up rowing the same year for cross-training for softball. She is now attending Wisconsin on a rowing scholarship.
in the 2012 Olympics, there were 4 Wisconsin alumni who competed in events they took up while in college. DS has a picture of himself with two of them. DS is barely 6', if he hasn't cut his hair for a while. The picture is with a set of 6'7" twins in a rowing event in Milwaukee. DS looks really short in that picture.
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