Rec league and TB team?

[imnobrn]

Just wondering how many DDs on here play for both a rec league (Little League, Babe Ruth etc) and a pay-to-play Travel tournament team? My DD has played since she was 5yoa (T-ball) and she's 10 now. Her father has coached as the AC each year except the first and has just stepped into the HC roll. Up until this year softball has been for her in her words "time with daddy". She's been an average player, probably getting a little daddyball preference on the field. This past season her interest in the game has skyrocketed. She has improved tremendously. Has asked to go watch older teams play. The day came when she discovered TB through a girl on her team. She asked about it and after explaining the time obligations and the difference in the level of competitiveness, asked to play this as well as LL ball.

Softball isn't huge in this area. We are limited in clubs to join. Her father wasn't happy about her wanting to play TB to start with, then when he talked to one of the coaches they clashed in their opinions about playing both rec and TB. The coach said he didn't want his players playing rec because it interferes with his team (schedules, pitching availability, injuries etc). Her father basically is against her playing for a tournament team now. To make matters worse, the original girl that made my DD interested in TB has decided to not play in the rec league that the ex (DD's dad) coaches, and a handful of other girls have just joined the TB club (but are still playing rec for him so far this fall ball season). He has expressed to me that he feels that he coaches them to a certain level and then they "leave rec for a perceived better team" and he doesn't want his daughter to be as ungrateful for what "got her to be the player she is".

I have found another team she could join that is more "rec friendly" and approached him with that option. He's now saying he feels it will be too much. Our rec league tops out at 12u. He thinks she should wait until then to play for a TB team. I say she should play now for competitive reasons and continue with rec for that daddy/daughter time as well as more playing time and social time with friends she's made there. She wants to do both. If she does, she will be doing it without his blessing and he has stated that if there is ever a scheduling conflict his team will be the one she's playing or practicing with.

So, back to my original question... how many DDs play on more than one team/league and if so are there any issues you have had doing both?

Thanks in advance, and please be gentle! I've been a lurker for awhile, and this is my first post.

 

[PA SB Dad]

My DD played rec and TB up to 12U, and it was a mistake for me to be the HC for her rec team and AC of her TB team. There were too many conflicts and it was ultimately unfair to the rec team, the TB team, and my DD. If I had to do it over again, I would not have coached the rec team, let DD play rec if she wanted, but concentrated her time with TB as her main focus.

Sounds like hubby is more concerned about his ego than your DD's love of the sport. When he says "he coaches them to a certain level and then leave for a better team", it is about him, not the players and certainly not your DD. This is the sort of attitude that results in daddies starting their own travel ball teams, so that they can keep control of what is taught, and be sure that DD is not "unfairly" treated by a coach who "does not know DD as well as I do."

I expect that my players will grow beyond what I can teach them (my DD is not on the team I coach, she plays for an older team). I told my players last year that even if they still want to play for me (12U moving to 14U), they should go to other tryouts. If they have college aspirations, I am not the right coach for them after this year. You have to expect that if you cannot coach them beyond a certain level, you are going to lose players, and your DD has to be one of the first you let go, otherwise she will never be any better than what daddy can teach them. Why not lose her to a really good program that develops players?

 

[ArkFastpitch]

I don't reccomend doing both. TB takes a lot of sacrifice and commitment from the player and the parents. Tournaments are usually 1 to 2 days and will play as many as 5-7 games in a weekend.
Avg rec league is 2 games a week and then you throw in a couple days of practice. Doesn't take long and the player and the parents are burnt out.

I coach a 10u travel team so I am a little biased to playing tournament ball. I'd say if your DD is a standout in rec ball then I think she would enjoy the challenge of stiffer competition in TB. I would not try to do both. If she doesn't like TB then she can always go back to rec league.

 

[moe]

My DD's do both, but their Rec coach is their Select coach too...so he sees huge benefits when half of his rec team is on the select team. He gets to dictate his rec schedule because he volunteers for both. I think if the HC believes in coaching fundamentals, that every girl, no matter how good could benefit from an hour a week working on simple stuff and just cutting up with her freinds and just playing for fun.

 

[JAD]

My DD started playing 10U TB when she was 9 and never went back to rec ball. I do know of some parks that require their TB teams to participate in their rec leagues as a condition for using their field space. If your DD gets on a good TB team, going back to rec ball would be like a 7th grader, who is a good student, repeating 5th grade.....it would not challenger her and she would loose interest.

* - if you watch the Little League softball world series you will see that there are still TB girls who play rec ball! LOL

 

[JAD]

Sounds like hubby is more concerned about his ego than your DD's love of the sport. When he says "he coaches them to a certain level and then leave for a better team", it is about him, not the players and certainly not your DD. This is the sort of attitude that results in daddies starting their own travel ball teams, so that they can keep control of what is taught, and be sure that DD is not "unfairly" treated by a coach who "does not know DD as well as I do."

Hammer meet nail ^^^^^^^^

 

[GatorGirl]

What about a compromise? You fulfill all of the travel commitments from a time perspective and he the rec. Try it for one season and then reevaluate where you are at. You may all love it or all hate it or somewhere in between. Ultimately, this has to be your daughter's decision. We can only "force" them to play for so long at what they don't want until it explodes in our face. Eventually they get bigger and smarter than us and let's face it--they will ALWAYS have more energy to fight us. lol

You all need to sit down as a family and decide "what you are working towards?" and base your decision on that. What decision or compromise meets the end goals for the family. Best of luck!

GG

 

[T.J.]

We do both. The Little League window is short and it's a big part of childhood and the community where we live; so we make sure they participate and get the full experience (parade, collections, All-Stars, clean-up day, league picnic, etc.) of Little League. It does take some prioritizing and discussion; but it is feasible to do both; and to contribute and benefit from both teams.

This will be her last year (LA12) in LL and I wouldn't want her to miss out on any of it.

 

[murphdog]

DD did both until last year. We will not be playing rec ball this year (would be her last yr of rec since she'll be in high school next year).
She's played TB since she was 8 but the past 2 years has played on highly competitive club teams and just hasn't been enjoying rec ball plus the time commitment of the club team is huge.

At her age there is no reason why she can't do both.

 

[imnobrn]

@ PA, I agree that his ego is the basis for his opinion to not have her play TB. I've tried explaining that he should be happy that her love of the game has blossomed from his and that their bond could also benefit from wahtching and cheering her play from the other side of the fence. I've even gone as far as asking the second teams HC if he could AC or at least help out at practice. His answer was that he puts alot of time in LL and he can't do both. "I expect that my players will grow beyond what I can teach them" I wish DXH (damn ex husband) could learn this lesson.

@Ark the second team I looked at is a C level team that practices 1x/week, and is planning 6 tournaments between May and Aug, and her Rec program practices 2x/week until games start then games are 2x/week with no practices. All-stars practice is 3x/week and the TB coach said he won't schedule any tournaments around all-stars time to allow his players to commit to that. I thought this was a good compromise and a good way to ease into TB for everyone.

@Moe the second team's HC was a rec coach, so that's where I'm guessing his attitude about rec ball and his players playing both comes from. I did offer DXH the opportunity to do some coaching in the TB side as well when I found the second team in my research to find a suitable club to join. He wants no part of it.

@JAD "going back to rec ball would be like a 7th grader, who is a good student, repeating 5th grade.....it would not challenger her and she would loose interest" I believe that is his fear.

@Gator Unfortunately he is an X because there isn't any compromise (among MANY other issues not for this forum) If she pays for both it will be without his help and quite possibly with him sabotaging, or at least trying to. I will solely be financially responsible for the fees as well as buying her a new helmet, glove and bag (he bought those, I bought cleats bat and batting gloves) We as a family (older DD as well) often give-in for the sake of keeping the peace in the family. Just trying to decide if this is one of those times we agree to disagree and I do this on my own. I also don't want this to backfire and have her get burnt out. He is a good coach and all the girls on the team love him. It is one of the few things he and DD have in common and enjoy doing together. I don't want to be the thing that ruins that either. I believe the end goal for DD is to have fun and play more, esp pitching.

Thanks everyone for your responses. I've learned so much from this forum! Keep posting