Proper way to discuss a matter with the coach

[Coach JV]

We had a pitcher on 14U travel last year that was being lit
up when we let her throw. She was a bit raw and had been taking lessons for
only a couple months. At best she was a below average OF. We spoke to the
team about earning their playing time and in 6 weeks she was a completely
different player. She went from not wanting to play OF to the best OF on the team.
She has grown much more confident in her game and has become a 'junkballer'
in the circle. She throws slow (45-48) and her junk breaks well. She is not a complete
game pitcher but is an unhittable master the first time thru the lineup

 

[Glipski]

...I can't imagine a coach telling a player she's going to be a great outfielder is the worst that's going to happen to her. If that throws her off her game.......I'd have my reservations."

Imagine your girlfriend pointing and giggling when you show her what you got. I would imagine to a young pitcher being told that she stinks it's about the same feeling. Pure and utter embarrassment and the feeling of inadequacy. I don't know for sure, but it just seems to me that if Patrick Murphy tells Kelsi Dunne that she sucks just before going out on the rubber, she might, I stress might, let it get her down a little.

I agree with your statement about being mentally tough. I actually have a series of things I do during my DD's practice sessions to help prepare her for yelling from the other dugout, yelling from other coaches and even the stands during her sessions on the rubber. It works. She had a grandmother from the other team with a small air-blast horn, the ones you use at football games that are really loud, that was blowing the thing just before release. It was sweet every time the ump held up that right fist, brother, let me tell you. After the first 2 K's the old lady gave it up. The umps never mentioned it, but that's another thread altogether.

They have to be tough, thick-skinned and great strategists, but they're still little girls. Remember the first time they looked at you and said "Dah-dee"? Well, in the larger scheme of things, they're not much older than that now...we seem to forget that sometimes.

 

[BrianMonk]

Imagine your girlfriend pointing and giggling when you show her what you got. .

My wife used to do that, now she's just given up and I can't even get her to look.

I would imagine to a young pitcher being told that she stinks it's about the same feeling. Pure and utter embarrassment and the feeling of inadequacy. I don't know for sure, but it just seems to me that if Patrick Murphy tells Kelsi Dunne that she sucks just before going out on the rubber, she might, I stress might, let it get her down a little.

Slow down Sparky. You've gone to...you suck as a pitcher when the actual comment was....you'll make a great outfielder. Quite a monumental leap (or change) you've put in there. When Patrick Murphy commented about the size of Kelley Montalvo, you think she cared? Anyway, I'd still have reservations on how successful a pitcher could actually be if they’re letting, what very well could be, a true compliment get them into the gutter. If you're looking to find something, chances are, you'll find it...real or imagined.

 

[Hollyrockartist]

I agree that being a fabulous OF is a wonderful thing! As a parent, I would hate to know the type of pressure my dd would be under if she were a pitcher (plays 1st and 3rd)!! Regardless, there always has to be someone in the dugout to replace pitchers - think of days when there are 4 tourney games. Do you really want your dd to pitch 4 games?

I also agree with the whole teenage girl thing - sometimes they do misunderstand what coaches are trying to tell them. My dd's varsity coach comes across rough 98% of the time - in her voice and her mannerisms. It is hard as a parent to sit and watch it but sometimes it is better than the alternative - having it taken out on your dd for saying something.

Weigh your options before talking to the coach...could have been a misunderstanding? Could have been a positive message? If you do opt to speak to her coach, make sure (please) that it is not during a game or before...make it a private meeting so there won't be a scene. Witnessed one of those and it gets ugly for the children and the parents! Good luck!