High School playing time/positions, How to ask...from the kid's perspective.

[_MIA_]

How do you get a promotion at work?

I can tell you how not to get one..tell the Dean he needs to admit better students when you get called into
his office for students complaining about the difficulty of your course.

 

[Nimrod]

This is really a life lesson. How do you get a promotion at work?

Step 1: Have your DD tell the coach you'll play wherever the coach needs her...RF, LF, 1B, 2B, 3B.

Step 2: She needs to hit better than everyone else on the team. You (Dad) should practice hitting with her *EVERYDAY*...after practice, after games, no matter what. 100 swings, every day.

Step 3: She has to be noticed at practice. She is first in line, first girl at practice, she listens to the coach, she picks up the equipment after practice, she always wants "one more". As "Come on, Coach, give me one more groundball" and "Ah, coach, just one more pitch."

Her goal is NOT to be better than the starting 2B or 3B.

Her goal is to be better than EVERYONE ON THE TEAM AT EVERY PRACTICE AND EVERY GAME.

I think this is a great post that I don't want to get lost on a previous page because of my ramblings, so I'll carry it over.

We as parents would like to believe that ours daughters can achieve anything they want in life if they just have a road map and work hard. In chemistry class, if you want to make an A, you average 90 or better on all your tests. In travel ball, if you want to be the starting third baseman, if all else fails, you find a team that needs a third baseman. There's always something that can fix it.

High school softball doesn't work that way. You're stuck. And there's nothing that a player ALONE can do to be the starting second baseman. It always depends on the other players on the TEAM and what the coach thinks about them.

So the question ''What can I do to get more playing time?" is a failure to grasp that reality, IMO. It shows that the player is out of touch. The coach doesn't care whether you play more or less. Coach just wants to win. That's the goal. The question is selfish in a way because high school softball isn't about finding ways for one particular player to play more; it's about being a better team. So, instead of ''What can I-ME-MINE do to play more?", I'd suggest a question that addresses how the TEAM can improve and my role in that. "How can I help the TEAM?" "What do I need to work on to make the TEAM better?"

Last thing and I'll stop it: If your kid is a better player than someone else, it's not because of two scrimmage games. And the fact that members of a certain travel team are all starting is not evidence of favoritism. Maybe that travel team is the OC Batbusters or the Atlanta Vipers. I'm not doubting that OP's DD is one of the best 9; coaches are wrong sometimes. But the information given to support that belief isn't more compelling than the fact that a coach - whose goal is almost always to win - believes otherwise.

 

[CoachJD]

Last thing and I'll stop it: If your kid is a better player than someone else, it's not because of two scrimmage games. And the fact that members of a certain travel team are all starting is not evidence of favoritism. Maybe that travel team is the OC Batbusters or the Atlanta Vipers. I'm not doubting that OP's DD is one of the best 9; coaches are wrong sometimes. But the information given to support that belief isn't more compelling than the fact that a coach - whose goal is almost always to win - believes otherwise.

Also, incumbents have their spot until they do something to lose it or someone else is so obviously better the coach has no choice. It's reasonable for this coach to start the 2B he knows (and presumably believes is good) until he sees enough evidence that someone else belongs there.

Unless the 2B is a total disaster, I don't see how two pretend games would be enough to override the coach's history with the player he knows. I know I'm not benching a starter who has proven her worth over a few seasons because of a couple mediocre games.

 

[tim_s]

i think asking about what can be done to earn more time is not a bad question, especially if she brings up the idea of "i am willing to work at multiple positions"......i would avoid giving a specific position, but the idea out there and let coach make the call

 

[dbronstein]

Of course. This goes for every kid though. Even the starters need to know what they need to work on to improve.

Great to hear you say this. I've seen too many coaches (in many sports) not play kids much but then never tell them what they need to improve on or work with them on it.

 

[Towny9]

Great to hear you say this. I've seen too many coaches (in many sports) not play kids much but then never tell them what they need to improve on or work with them on it.

I’ve been the kid on the bench before. I know how tough it is. I tried to go out of my way to give those kids attention and let them know how big a part of the team they were and how much I appreciated their attitude despite them not playing much - that I was proud of them.

I also tried to let seniors play their way out of a spot and give them the first shot at winning a position. If you do that, then they can’t say they didn’t have a chance. The kids usually respect you more as a coach too knowing they had a shot.

 

[Rolling Hard]

"starting decisions were made via a wrestle off."

I think we may be on to something here. Any player can challenge a position on Mondays and Wednesdays. Each player get 10 GB or FBs and 10 swings of front toss. Coaches judge each swing/hit and fielding attempt (1 to 10 on paper), tally it up and announce the winner. Monday's winners plays Tuesday and Wednesday's winners plays Thursday. As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.

 

[Rolling Hard]

This is a very sensitive subject for many coaches. I have heard many coaches say "never ask about playing time". Whatever you do, do not approach the coach on your dd's behalf. Your dd can ask the coach what she can do to help the team. With some coaches, this would be ok. Other coaches may go psycho on dd.

Many coaches need to get over themselves and retire.

 

[Rolling Hard]

This is really a life lesson. How do you get a promotion at work?

Step 1: Have your DD tell the coach she'll play wherever the coach needs her...RF, LF, 1B, 2B, 3B.

Step 2: She needs to hit better than everyone else on the team. You (Dad) should practice hitting with her *EVERYDAY*...after practice, after games, no matter what. 100 swings, every day.

Step 3: She has to be noticed at practice. She is first in line, first girl at practice, she listens to the coach, she picks up the equipment after practice, she always wants "one more". As "Come on, Coach, give me one more groundball" and "Ah, coach, just one more pitch."

Her goal is NOT to be better than the starting 2B or 3B.

Her goal is to be better than EVERYONE ON THE TEAM AT EVERY PRACTICE AND EVERY GAME.

I don't know if you need EVERYDAY or a 100 swings BUT extra work is an absolute requirement. In an one on one setting, she can get a lot of swings in 30 minutes.

 

[Filterbing]

This is really a life lesson. How do you get a promotion at work?

Step 1: Have your DD tell the coach she'll play wherever the coach needs her...RF, LF, 1B, 2B, 3B.

Step 2: She needs to hit better than everyone else on the team. You (Dad) should practice hitting with her *EVERYDAY*...after practice, after games, no matter what. 100 swings, every day.

Step 3: She has to be noticed at practice. She is first in line, first girl at practice, she listens to the coach, she picks up the equipment after practice, she always wants "one more". As "Come on, Coach, give me one more groundball" and "Ah, coach, just one more pitch."

Her goal is NOT to be better than the starting 2B or 3B.

Her goal is to be better than EVERYONE ON THE TEAM AT EVERY PRACTICE AND EVERY GAME.

This has been my mentality about the situation.