Dealing with unruly player?

[chardrok]

My son is a hard kid for coaches to gauge. It takes him a while to become engaged when he's on a new team.
Last year, we had a coach ask us how to better reach him, and honestly it really made me appreciate and respect that coach for his desire to get the most out of a kid.
This year, different coach, same scenario, except I had to be the one to reach out to the coach and explain to them what makes him respond better. Until that point, he'd been marginalized by the coaches.
Once they gave him more of a chance to perform under adverse conditions(another kid's appendix ruptured), he responded quite well, and now he's playing every inning, and he's excited to go to practice.

I'm glad you found what inspires this girl to play. As a parent of a kid that will test your teaching methods, I know how difficult that can be, and I appreciate anyone that will look deeper into a kid, and go to the trouble to try to find out what works.

 

[chardrok]

OF sucks at lower ages.

Agreed. I think a ton of kids lose interest in this sport by being stuck out in the outfield at a young age. I don't have a good answer for that. We try to rotate players around as much as we can on our Rec. team, but...

 

[Eric F]

Agreed. I think a ton of kids lose interest in this sport by being stuck out in the outfield at a young age. I don't have a good answer for that. We try to rotate players around as much as we can on our Rec. team, but...

One problem with rec ball OF I have witnessed repeatedly is that the OF's aren't taught to do anything but stand out there until there is a ball to chase. This is a coaching fail. Getting OF's moving with backing up at bases keeps them much more active and attentive.

First season of 10U, our primary CF fully embraced the job of backing up 2B on throws from C (my kid). She saved the team many, many runs just by keeping the ball in front of her on bad throws from C or missed catches by our SS.

 

[Greenmonsters]

FWIW the best position for a kid with un/diagnosed attention issues is catcher IME. They love the action (and are well padded if they happen to get distracted!).

 

[CRJC]

FWIW the best position for a kid with un/diagnosed attention issues is catcher IME. They love the action (and are well padded if they happen to get distracted!).

We've actually decided to try her at catcher for our next game. We talked to her about it and she seems to be pretty excited!

 

[JerseyBall]

I figured out a long time ago, you can't fix or change the attitude of other people, and by extension, your players. When it comes to these young ladies, their attitude is always a reaction to something going on either on your field or in their lives.
Your response is usually one of two things, either attempt to find out what's triggering their attitude and decide if their is something in your control you can adjust to help them feel differently, or to not deal with it and cut them loose. Or in your case ignore and put her in RF.

You took the better path as a coach. You talked to her, found out the issue and decided there were ways of changing her triggers to bring joy rather than despair. Now later in her softball career she is going to have to learn that players can't always control their situations, only their response. But at 10 years old, you put her on a better path to hopefully love playing this here game we love.
Marcus Aurelius said, The impediment to action leads to action, what stands in the way, becomes the way. You had a obstacle in your way and rather than trying to go around it, you chose to deal directly with it and became a better coach because of it.
My heartfelt congratulations to you and her.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G935A using Tapatalk

 

[Coach JV]

WOW-you have received some great tips. I would refrain from email as it can be taken out of context.
The family meeting should include examples of what makes a good teammate and behavior that is expected in the team
environment. She is a little girl, direct all conversation in a most positive way to the parents, do not address the player
directly unless she asks a question of you. Be careful when answering, constant glance at parents for approval to
speak to their daughter.

I had a 12U rec player once who played to be with her friends, not because she liked the game. I had a conversation
with her and her dad about sportsmanship and being a team player. Dad was insulted as he was not aware of
her poor sportsmanship/behavior in the dugout. She cried her eyes out when I called her out. The balance of that season
was a bit dicey. A couple years later, I saw her playing 16U rec and she was completely different. She is now
in college (not playing) but I saw her over spring break, she actually remembered that conversation and thanked me
as it helped her grow closer to her parents, as hers wasn't a great household behind closed doors. She ended our
talk with a hug and 'thanks for everything coach'. This time it was me who had a tear in the eyes.

 

[Eric F]

We've actually decided to try her at catcher for our next game. We talked to her about it and she seems to be pretty excited!

PLEASE make sure she gets some practice time before throwing her into a game, and learns how to protect her throwing hand (!!!!!). The catching section of DFP has some good tips for guiding new catchers.

If she wants to be involved in the game, catcher is it. Be prepared for her to immediately love it...or hate it.