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Thread: Another softball coach accused of molestation

  1. #11
    Softball Junkie justanotherguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grcsftbll View Post
    Could it be related to severity of the crime? For instance, women rarely commit violent rape. Rarely commit rape at all but when they do it's usually of the statutory variety. I knew a 14 year old victim of statutory rape by her 18 year old boyfriend, who had the bad judgment to sleep with a lawyer's daughter. He got no jail time (which I'm glad of, as there was a relationship there, and he was not much more than a child himself, a fellow student with no more power than she had - they later had a child of their own and got married).

    Here we have a female predator, but also a female victim who's very young. It'll be interesting to see how the case gets handled. Any adult who molests a 12 year old should get very serious jail time, I don't care what gender they are.
    I'm speaking to crime in general. I don't know about very specific crimes like violent rape. I think we can all agree that's rare in women. I am familiar with LOTS of news stories of women teachers and underage students getting caught and the teachers receiving very light to no prison time. I don't know why it's happening, but one of these stories pops up almost every week. Of course we can all agree of the gender bias of men with girls vs women with boys and I'll fully admit to it myself. As a 15yo boy, I would have happily let one certain english teacher "take advantage" of me.


  2. #12
    Certified softball maniac BT3100's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by justanotherguy View Post
    A simple google search will show females receive far less prison time than men for almost any crime. Some females do get stiff sentences; but time and time again, women get off with a slap on the wrist "comparatively" to men.
    Pretty much a well established fact. I thought everyone knew that?
    You wanna know the difference between good players and great players? Good players look at 3-0 strikes, great players punish 3-0 strikes

  3. #13
    I eat, sleep and breathe softball grcsftbll's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by justanotherguy View Post
    I'm speaking to crime in general. I don't know about very specific crimes like violent rape. I think we can all agree that's rare in women. I am familiar with LOTS of news stories of women teachers and underage students getting caught and the teachers receiving very light to no prison time. I don't know why it's happening, but one of these stories pops up almost every week. Of course we can all agree of the gender bias of men with girls vs women with boys and I'll fully admit to it myself. As a 15yo boy, I would have happily let one certain english teacher "take advantage" of me.
    I think that's exactly it. It's actually, IMO, another example of that catch phrase I don't even like to use (toxic masculinity). Boys are too tough to be victims. They all just want sex all the time anyway, so an older woman is a score, not a violation. In my opinion they should be treated equally. A person in a position of power who has a sexual relationship with a minor should be punished. I don't care what kind of genitals they have. On top of this, it seems like it would benefit women but if you look underneath the layers it's part of a system that's got a patriarchal basis. Anyone who is in favor of equal rights for women must also be in favor of them being held equally responsible for crimes they commit.
    Softball Mom

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    Softball Junkie justanotherguy's Avatar
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    My responses were more aimed at CoachJD's assertion that women will receive the same sentence as men in this scenario. I say, highly doubtful.

    I think we've now started to stumble into a whole other topic though of "equality". If 3rd wave feminism wants "equality", well let's do it then! Prison sentences should be no different for women than men. Females required to register for the draft as well and will go to the front lines. Can't carry all your gear? Too damn bad. Ship going down? Women and children first? F THAT! Fight for your spot.

    Ok, I need to go back to thinking about my English teacher.

  5. #15
    I can talk softball all day IndyHScoach's Avatar
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    As a male high school coach of female athletes we use the app remind.com. This not only allows you to post group messages to players and parents but also individual messages if necessary. The catch is that the app saves all communications to protect everyone involved. Just a suggestion.

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    Certified softball maniac Westwind's Avatar
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    The last guy in our area that did something stupid communicating with the players friended them on Instagram and made stupid public comments on their stories. He was gone in a flash.

    Indyhscoach, I think that is the way to roll. Both of my dd’s have been on teams that used various versions of that kind of app.

    There does come a day when adult coaches must communicate directly with players by text and email. One of my dd’s played for a 16u coach that refused to communicate with anyone except the player about schedules, fees, anything routine. He had a great system and my dd benefitted from it. Yet there is no reason to duplicate at lower ages.
    Some ol’ slicks tryin’ to give me friction.

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    Softball Junkie CoachJD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by justanotherguy View Post
    A simple google search will show females receive far less prison time than men for almost any crime. Some females do get stiff sentences; but time and time again, women get off with a slap on the wrist "comparatively" to men.
    A lot of factors go into sentencing, but the post I was replying to implied that women who do this do not get punished. That's simply not true.

    I will admit to cherry-picking a bit here (because, sadly, there are SO many of these stories... impossible to find them all to truly compare).

    But we have this: The Bristol Press - Female teacher pleads guilty for having sex with student

    And this: Former Binghamton Teacher Pleads Guilty To Sexual Acts With A St - FOX 40 WICZ TV - News, Sports, Weather, Contests & More

    The point I'm making -- and I've seen nothing to suggest it's wrong -- is that female teachers are punished for these crimes (as they should be). Sometimes they get off light, for whatever reason. But sometimes male teachers get off light, too. It's not like a male teacher's doing 10 years hard time and women get off with probation in all cases. That's just not true.

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    I eat, sleep and breathe softball Rocketech1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DILLIGAF View Post
    Chicks don't get busted for this sort of thing, a dude coach would be hung from a backstop by his scrotum but a chick might get a little public shame and a slap on the wrist.
    Double standards are awesome
    By the way, respectable adults don’t call women “chicks”....smh..

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    I can talk softball all day gdc03120's Avatar
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    I think a lot depends on the level and situation. I have all of my parents' cell numbers, created a group in my phone for contacts, and mass-text the parents about practices/changes, etc. Occasionally I have a player personally text me if they have to inform me of missing a practice, etc. I generally save their numbers just so I know who is texting me in the future, but I will not initiate conversation with a player unless it's face-to-face. Just more personal that way. All of my practices are at our town recreation fields, and are open to anyone (read: parents) to watch (with the understanding they are NOT to coach their kid - it's part of their code of conduct). I do everything I can to create an environment that is 100% transparent and open to anyone to see/interpret - this way my players are comfortable, my parents are comfortable, and more can get accomplished on the field.

  13. #20
    Certified softball maniac NVfishing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndyHScoach View Post
    As a male high school coach of female athletes we use the app remind.com. This not only allows you to post group messages to players and parents but also individual messages if necessary. The catch is that the app saves all communications to protect everyone involved. Just a suggestion.
    I was using a group messaging app a few years ago. One of the parents or players gave me a wrong number. Every time I would send off a group text for practice or games it would blast the wrong number with the text and replies. Even after I deleted the number from my phone it was still going to the wrong number. I was getting very hateful replies from that wrong number.


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