Don't be that parent

[JAD]

Agreed. But is there a difference between 10u and 18u in this regard?

There are a lot of 18U coaches who do not know a thing about pitching mechanics. All pitchers mechanics/issues are not the same. I feel qualified to help my DD if necessary, but not every other pitcher on her team.

 

[ilovesoftball]

Hopefully, dad, you became THAT PARENT and gave your young first year coach some advise on people, prejudging and not being THAT COACH. She might have let a diamond go by because of preconceived ideas. These coaches need to understand they are recruiting babies. You are asking these kids to be well manicured college athletes but many haven't even hit puberty yet. Give them and their parents a break...I am sure this young coach got a boo boo or something great happened while she was playing and she went running to her parents!

 

[dadofadirtlover]

Today at batting practice, I took our #4 aside to work with her on location of her pitches. Her mom said she had been working with her everyday and she's been making progress. I didn't see it. Mom sat there looking like she was about to explode. DD was clearly nervous and trying to prove she was doing better. I looked at her DD and said, what does your mom say when you do that? She looked at her mom, sighed hard, thought, and recited the phrase her mom uses (same action, just a different phrase). Boom....6 strikes in a row all in the location they were supposed to be in. Then, she got overexcited and couldn't find the plate again for what felt like an eternity until I asked her again.....what does your mom say when you do that? Mom was relieved because I wasn't trying to control anything. Just wanted to see where she was. DD calmed her nerves and could do better. I guess what I'm saying is.....there is room for the parent and the coach to coexist since "both have their development as the ultimate goal". If bucket mom/dad knows something, use it! It saves time and helps everyone. If the little brother of a showcase player can say something in between innings that will convert a pitcher for giving up 4 hits and 2 walks to giving up 1 hit and no walks, you better find a way to get Josh to build a spyder lynk attachment and tether him up there (it's a joke people....don't call CPS). If it works, why feel threatened?

 

[Cannonball]

So, when the SS fields a ball incorrectly, let the parents coach her. When the 1B strikes out, clear a place on the bench for the mom or dad so they can talk to her. If the bunt defense is wrong and makes the pitcher look bad, call a meeting and let the parents tell the team how they would prefer that the team defend the bunt as not to make their dd look bad. It is the same thing.

 

[chinamigarden]

Whether you agree with the idea that players should not leave the dugout to see their parents between innings is unimportant. What you should know is that this Grad assistant represents a program and I would guess that she knows better then anyone else on this thread what her head coach looks for in a player. And if leaving the dugout between innings is a cardinal sin to this HC, then she is right to not recommend this girl further. Whether you agree or not, she might be doing this girl a favor. How would you feel if your dd went to a school and after the first game she gets benched and her head ripped off because she leaned out of the dugout to listen to you give her your observation on hand position at 3 oclock?

A coach who does not like this sort of interaction should not take on a girl whose parent insists on it, right/wrong or otherwise it would be a bad fit.

 

[chinamigarden]

How many parents give their kids "words of advice or encouragement" when they are about to step into the batters box? How is telling your DD to "lay off the rise ball" any different than offering advice to a pitcher, other than one is done through the fence right before she hits, and one is done between innings. BTW - I now tell my DD "lay off the pitch that flattens out" and I get a lot of funny looks from other parents....

As a pitchers parent you know that the words of advise hollered at a batter usually end up telling the pitcher which pitch to throw. Be aggressive up there honey, start sooner (change up) Watch for the change up (fastest pitch I throw)...

 

[chinamigarden]

Professional golfers have caddies that provide advice all the time....I imagine that high school golf does not allow it in an attempt to be fair to all participants.

It is against the rules of golf (all golf) to take advice during a round, the only exception is your caddy, and you are only allowed one caddy at a time. The exception in HS golf is that they are not allowed to have caddies, so there goes the only person you are allowed to take advice from by rule.

 

[Eric F]

So, when the SS fields a ball incorrectly, let the parents coach her. When the 1B strikes out, clear a place on the bench for the mom or dad so they can talk to her. If the bunt defense is wrong and makes the pitcher look bad, call a meeting and let the parents tell the team how they would prefer that the team defend the bunt as not to make their dd look bad. It is the same thing.

Not quite, CB. I believe dadofadirtlover is talking about a pretty young player (10U, maybe?) in a rec ball situation, and - as is very common - it sounds like the parent is essentially the player's pitching instructor. If I'm working with a young player who I know has a private instructor, I will often ask the player what kind of cues or advice their instructor uses with them. Especially for a young players, using consistent cues can be important to minimize confusion.

 

[Cannonball]

It is against the rules of golf (all golf) to take advice during a round, the only exception is your caddy, and you are only allowed one caddy at a time. The exception in HS golf is that they are not allowed to have caddies, so there goes the only person you are allowed to take advice from by rule.

By rule in the State of Illinois, I can and do give instruction. The only exception in my state is that I am not allowed to say anything or even complete a sentence when any player in a group steps onto the green.

Currently, we are 15-5 on the year. We played a round last night where I did my best to coach all of my girls. I am often soaking wet after a round I coach. In fact, the kids laugh at me and puddle of water that runs off of me on the bus without air conditioning.

I deleted a post here but will suggest that the OP is correct in how the majority of college coaches view parents coaching from the sidelines. The OPs daughter, imo, was simply repeating what she has often heard from other college coaches during the coaching process. Even carrying a dd's bat bag is considered a no no by most college coaches.

 

[dadofadirtlover]

Not quite, CB. I believe dadofadirtlover is talking about a pretty young player (10U, maybe?) in a rec ball situation, and - as is very common - it sounds like the parent is essentially the player's pitching instructor. If I'm working with a young player who I know has a private instructor, I will often ask the player what kind of cues or advice their instructor uses with them. Especially for a young players, using consistent cues can be important to minimize confusion.

Correct. I'm talking about 10U rec, not 18U showcase.