Grabbing player's mask, ok or not?

[CycloneSoftball22]

The list of things that a coach has to deal with these days from parents seems to be growing.

-Dont raise your voice to players
-No running as a consequence
-No touching facemask
-Players able to miss practices for other sports with no consequences. It is the coach job to accomodate them

 

[sportinus]

Not seeing I cannot comment on it. I do not grab the masks. I do put my hand on top of the helmets at times. Sometimes to help focus, sometimes to show empathy, sometimes to say good job.

IMHO (yes he is getting on the soap box) a lot of children these days are over empowered/entitled. I see it in the schools, in sports, in clubs. i see it in a lot of stories on these board. It is ok for our children not to get everything they want, it is ok not to get your desired position on the field or in the batting order. It is ok to be disappointed, to get mad, to be corrected, to get pulled for not performing... I find it interesting that we are so afraid to anger/offend that we end up not interacting in a truthful or constructive manner. For you extremists I am not condoning intimidation/ abuse (mental or physical), vulgarity or rudeness.

As an example I have seen posts on here stating my DD is not the #1 <fill in the blank> because the coaches DD is. That darn daddy ball. First off hats off to the Dads that volunteer their time and efforts and money to mange a team, with out them the would be a lot of girls not playing. Do some coaches show favoritism? Yes but is every case we hear about an example of that I doubt it, It is all our perceptions. You think your daughter is better, some one has a different opinion so they are wrong and biased and you are correct? I would speculate that most coaches want to put their best players out there whether it is their daughter or not. One season I had a parent come up to me after a game (breaking my 24 hour rule) saying how could I move their daughter down in my line up especially after she went 3 for 4 the previous game and was 2 for 3 this game. I replied (breaking my own 24 hour rule) that she did not fo 3 for 4 or 2 for 3 ... I explained that getting on base by a fc was not a hit and that I moved her down because she was not swinging thru the ball and so that was causing her to hit routine grounders to short. That parent then mad ethe statement that she will be playing for a different team next season.

Ok I am off the soap box and done rambling. Maybe I am just cranky because with all the rain we have not played yet.

 

[BradB41]

The list of things that a coach has to deal with these days from parents seems to be growing.

-Dont raise your voice to players
-No running as a consequence
-No touching facemask
-Players able to miss practices for other sports with no consequences. It is the coach job to accomodate them

That's the world we live in. As for the original post, I'd say grabbing a facemask is over the line. That wouldn't have amounted to a pimple on a gnat's hind end when I was a kid, but we live in a different world nowadays. I coach and I'd never do that to a kid...well, maybe my own...but not someone else's.

 

[CycloneSoftball22]

That's the world we live in. As for the original post, I'd say grabbing a facemask is over the line. That wouldn't have amounted to a pimple on a gnat's hind end when I was a kid, but we live in a different world nowadays.

"The world we live in"....Hmmm......Is that a good thing? A bunch of enabled , entitled , kids?

 

[GOINGDEEP]

As I said before, these things are hard to visualize since we didn't see the actual event. We have to go by someone else's interpretation of what happened, and that can vary on his/her beliefs and experience.

But I'll add this as some humor. When I hear "grabbing the mask" it brings back some HS memories. This is our HS football coach with the Jason mask on in the back. He wrestled in the early 80's in Memphis, Lord Humongous. For you older wrestling guys, that's Jimmy Hart and Humongous had a long rival with Jerry the king Lawler. He was about 6'6-7, 300+. When he grabbed your face guard you were lucky your head didn't come off in his hands.

So what I remember as a mask grab, and what happened here in the OP, could be very different.

[/IMG]

 

[CoogansBluff]

You tell me what's wrong with it.

Except for a parent-child situation, an adult does not have the right to use physical force to turn a kid's head or force a kid to look at them, IMO. A child's head and helmet belong to the child and should not be used or manipulated without the child's permission.

I can promise you wouldn't have a single one of my parents suggest that I have ever attempted to "scold" or "intimidate" any of my players.

The endorsement of your parents justifies nothing. Just because the parents and coaches are on the same page doesn't mean that the coaches are right. I've seen plenty of idiot coaches leading a band of idiot parents.

the intent and harm has to be there.

No, it doesn't. Most coaches who bully their players don't intend to harm them. They think what they are doing is helpful. See Rutgers.

 

[JDBerry]

Except for a parent-child situation, an adult does not have the right to use physical force to turn a kid's head or force a kid to look at them, IMO. A child's head and helmet belong to the child and should not be used or manipulated without the child's permission.



The endorsement of your parents justifies nothing. Just because the parents and coaches are on the same page doesn't mean that the coaches are right. I've seen plenty of idiot coaches leading a band of idiot parents.



No, it doesn't. Most coaches who bully their players don't intend to harm them. They think what they are doing is helpful. See Rutgers.

we, as a society, are doomed

 

[Greenmonsters]

You tell me what's wrong with it.

There seems to be a lot of personal projection here on this issue Making something more out of it than it is. I can promise you wouldn't have a single one of my parents suggest that I have ever attempted to "scold" or "intimidate" any of my players. I've grabbed the catcher by the mask and gently shook her head when she made mistake and said "shake those cobwebs out". I've "popped" a facemask. I've popped a baserunner on the helmet when they made a mistake on pop fly, much like I would donk on the forehead. I've put my hand on top of their helmet and pointed their head. I've hooked my finger on a facemask so they are looking at me when they are crying and tell them that there is no crying allowed in softball. None of it was intimidating or even antagonizing. It was actually in good fun.

on a soapbox, and to be quite frank, this is one of the issues with bullying. too many helicopter parents look at everything all or nothing, black or white. If their kid is ribbed or picked on at all, then it's bullying. Same with this, the intent and harm has to be there. If it's not there, then it simply devalues the calls from those who truly are complaining about some coach truly bullying a player. Context, as with everything, is vitally important to decide if something is "right or wrong."

If you fail to even recognize that it's unnecessary, sadly there's nothing I can write that will help you understand why its wrong.

 

[JDBerry]

Except for a parent-child situation, an adult does not have the right to use physical force to turn a kid's head or force a kid to look at them, IMO. A child's head and helmet belong to the child and should not be used or manipulated without the child's permission.

that's your opinion. you think it's ok for a parent to do, but not ok for a coach to do.

it's not the act that bothers you, apparently. it's this projection that the coach must be doing something wrong, while, the parent doesn't get the same treatment

weird.

 

[JDBerry]

If you fail to even recognize that it's unnecessary, sadly there's nothing I can write that will help you understand why its wrong.

unnecessary and wrong are two completely different things.

I do quite a bit of things in life that are unnecessary... nothing makes it wrong.