DD is 13 and in a couple of weeks, for the first time in her career, she will be playing in a tournament against her former team. Even though we left on good terms, we've encountered some of the parents around town and have been receiving icy receptions. It COULD be just our imaginations, but... In any event, just curious if any of you have had similar experiences and if you had any advice. We really have no interest in revenge or anything of the sort. Again, we left on good terms and personally we really love the girls and parents on her former team. It would be tough to lose to them, and it would be tough to beat them badly. DD has expressed some anxiety about playing against her former team but mostly she's been pretty matter of fact about it. I view that as a good sign. Anyway, would love to read about some similar experiences. Thanks.
playing against former team
- Thread starter 29dad
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My DD has been through this. She has changed teams several times as she either aged up or worked her way up from in-house to high-level "A" competitive travel. You do get some Icy receptions on occasion... however time does make that go away.
Sometimes it seems that the cold receptions come from parents that either 1) weren't really your friends on the team, but were "nice" when you were there and have no reason to continue the "friendship" or 2) are upset that your daughter didn't stay on the team (Why'd you leave? you didn't like us? Or... Boo Hoo our team is not as good without you!).
As far as the actual game goes against the former team, it really isn't a big deal. DD is a pitcher and the first few times she had to pitch against one of her former teams she was concerned. Would she mess up and lose the game or would her new team beat her old team badly? In the end, each time it has been a non-issue. The former teammates actually liked playing against each other and it was good to see some old "friends."
Sometimes it seems that the cold receptions come from parents that either 1) weren't really your friends on the team, but were "nice" when you were there and have no reason to continue the "friendship" or 2) are upset that your daughter didn't stay on the team (Why'd you leave? you didn't like us? Or... Boo Hoo our team is not as good without you!).
As far as the actual game goes against the former team, it really isn't a big deal. DD is a pitcher and the first few times she had to pitch against one of her former teams she was concerned. Would she mess up and lose the game or would her new team beat her old team badly? In the end, each time it has been a non-issue. The former teammates actually liked playing against each other and it was good to see some old "friends."
Sort of dealt with this this past weekend. DD's school mates are all on a different travel team then her and they, as well as their parents, have been saying they wanted to play us. Finally we met up this past Saturday, DD was a little nervous but not too bad and we ended up winning 9-1. Should meet up with them again this weekend, hopefully it will be the same out come. 
Coach-n-Dad
Crazy Daddy
- Oct 31, 2008
- 1,007
- 0
DD had it happen a couple of years ago when she moved to a team playing at a higher level. They ran into her old team at a tournament. She was treated respectfully by the other players and even the coaches, the nastyness came from the stands as the parents yelled cat-calls and one dad even stood behind the backstop trying to distract her.
Last summer DD was treated very badly by her coaches (they were removed from the organization and started their own team). Her team has not faced the coaches new team yet, but when they do her current coach has promised that she will get the start.
Last summer DD was treated very badly by her coaches (they were removed from the organization and started their own team). Her team has not faced the coaches new team yet, but when they do her current coach has promised that she will get the start.
We tried something 2nd year 14u that I always wanted to do. Me and my good friend built a team primarily with former "unhappy" players from 5 different TB teams.*
It spanned about 200 miles in recruiting, girls from 11 different schools.*
We were all open from the start that the intention of the team was to "headhunt". We chased all their former teams all summer, multiple states to get it done.*
It was one of the most FUN years I/we ever had. That group was crazy but man they were a blast too!!*
We won state championships, huge NIT's, 2nd place in OK city Gold, and lots of more localized tourneys.*
Those girls were so hungry to beat their old teams and for their own reasons. And the fuel worked great to bring our team together.*
That was one heck of a ride, those girls slugged like no other team I had coached. Out scored others that summer 256-96.*
But, it was a one and done. Half the team had to travel couple of hours for practice and after they got the satisfaction of beating the old rivals it was over that fall season. We all stay in touch via text and Facebook and see each other on the battle field even though we now wear different colors.*
It was a BLAST!!
It spanned about 200 miles in recruiting, girls from 11 different schools.*
We were all open from the start that the intention of the team was to "headhunt". We chased all their former teams all summer, multiple states to get it done.*
It was one of the most FUN years I/we ever had. That group was crazy but man they were a blast too!!*
We won state championships, huge NIT's, 2nd place in OK city Gold, and lots of more localized tourneys.*
Those girls were so hungry to beat their old teams and for their own reasons. And the fuel worked great to bring our team together.*
That was one heck of a ride, those girls slugged like no other team I had coached. Out scored others that summer 256-96.*
But, it was a one and done. Half the team had to travel couple of hours for practice and after they got the satisfaction of beating the old rivals it was over that fall season. We all stay in touch via text and Facebook and see each other on the battle field even though we now wear different colors.*
It was a BLAST!!
- May 25, 2010
- 1,070
- 0
The frostiness of some people out here never ceases to amaze me. My DD is 9. And is in rec.
She faced her old team this year and crazy dad saw it as a lose-lose situation if she pitched. Fortunately, she only pitched part of the game and her team did win.
Kids are so adaptable, but parents struggle to be adults sometimes.
Thank goodness for daughters who are players who just go get the job done.
She faced her old team this year and crazy dad saw it as a lose-lose situation if she pitched. Fortunately, she only pitched part of the game and her team did win.
Kids are so adaptable, but parents struggle to be adults sometimes.
Thank goodness for daughters who are players who just go get the job done.
I've been through this once and it was rewarding. We too left on good terms, other players did not. Three of the girls who left (by their chosing or not being asked bacK) are still playing in the same age as the former team. My dd team remains undefeated against her old team, but she sees less/little playing time. She has close friendships with her original former teammates and coaches. They loved the girls who left too, but the girls/parents did a lot to burn the bridge. SB is such a small community in our area we'll see them 1/2 dozen more times before the year is up. It's nice to be able to say "hi" and cheer for old teammates, rather then wish for their demise...except against us
It is almost inevitable within tb. As you grow older, the community gets smaller. Just remember to keep your cool and maybe not smile toooo much when you beat them. One day you may want or be asked to play with them again. Don't read too much into the cold reception from others, it is just like life. In my life, I don't like many people anyway ;-).
My DD and all her friends on different teams all speak smack to each other before, during and after the game. The kids handle this way better than adults for the most part.
The parents I liked I have never ever had any issue with and I give the friendly hello to everyone else. Take the high ground and don't burn bridges - you never know how things end up and somehow, somewhen you end up back on the same team with parents and kids you never thought you would ever play with again.
The parents I liked I have never ever had any issue with and I give the friendly hello to everyone else. Take the high ground and don't burn bridges - you never know how things end up and somehow, somewhen you end up back on the same team with parents and kids you never thought you would ever play with again.
- Jan 25, 2011
- 2,278
- 38
I have my dd give the first girl she use to play with a little chin music, and then you dont have to worry about the other parents talking to you anymore.I find it better not being on speaking terms.
I find it better not being on speaking terms.
