Need of advice with parent problem

[James Smith]

Like you the board is tired of hearing about it.

Unfortunatly you do need to defend your position, from your post it sounds like you are doing a good job.

Sounds like your season is almost done so just try and ignore her for a few more games and not draft them next year. I would also advise the board not to allow them to join next year unless they have a change in behavior.

Edit: I am pretty sure DD would not be invited back if we took the ball and went home in the middle of the game like you described.

 

[Coach Al]

Thanks, Al, but I'm still not clear on what the board's position is. Do they think the girl should've played infield? If so, why? What is it that you did wrong, in their opinion?

According to our records, they have played infield, either she wasn't their to see it or ignored it.

 

[mogsoftball]

Wait so trhe board decides who plays where? I understand having a minimum inning played rule, but not a rule on where they should play.

On a side note this is why I refer to the complaints about being in the outfield as a rec ball attitute. We found out this year in travel how important an outfield is.

We still have a couple of parents that complain when their kid is in the outfield and it kills me. So many balls get hit out there and the outfield will win and lose games for you. My DD split time between 2b and outfield pretty much 50/50 and I don't have a problem with it.

 

[James Smith]

I want to join your Leaque, HC, ACs, president, board have no interest in my complaints. But since you brought it up my DD doesn’t pitch enough, can your board fix it for me?

 

[mogsoftball]

yeah if the board is deciding parents dictate where players play then pitching must be a real s***storm.

 

[WARRIORMIKE]

LOL

Had this situation this past season as well. Girl has been playing with me since 7. Now shes 12. Still lacks the confidence. So I started giving her her min. play. Parents got mad cause they felt that I was being unfair. So they threatened me saying that I need to rotate her in like I did in 10U. I clearly stated that at 12U's that things change and its not the same rules as 10U. They didn't want to hear it. They told me that if I don't play their dd that they would pull her. I said I am not changing the way I do things. They pulled her and left. When I moved up to this level I was advised that I may loose friends. It suxs but I don't coach to make people happy!

I would shrug it off if I were you and move on. Let Crazy mom go somewhere else! lol

 

[Eric F]

If you're within the League guidelines for playing time (as it seems you are), your job as coach is to do the best you can with the players you have. To me, that means giving your team the best chance to win by playing the best players for each position. If you can accommodate a position request, that's great. If it jeopardizes the team's success, however, you're going to start alienating a lot more parents. If the Board starts mandating who plays where, there's a very big problem with the way things are run, and it sounds like a good reason to not return as a coach next season. IMO, unless there is a clear violation of League policy, the Board should be supporting their coaches' decisions on the field.

 

[Pdiddy]

you should try and forget about it and move on.....I understand that rec leagues are what they are, but bad behavior is bad behavior and can not be tolerated. You should tell the league president you are done with her and unfortunately her DD's....and I would tell the mom that she isn't welcome to your picnic and that whatever activity was planned, has now been cancelled and that you are going to explain to YOUR team why? I would also conmpletely ignor her and block her phone number....crazy arsses cant stand being ignored plus it keeps any anyone from accusing you of escalating the matter....

 

[Coach Al]

I have coached either youth baseball or girls softball on and off since 1978. I have had many kids over the years try to tell me where they want to play. However I have never had it done by a parent. These girls never complained once about where they were on the field. It was mom who insisted on where she wanted to see them. We are going to be in the championship game this week. I sent out my usual group e mail with the game info. If they show up, me and my AC will be more than glad to have them participate. But I will not allow a parent to dictate position assignments. I know that not all the team parents at times may like the way I do things. I do make mistakes at time, but I always have the girls best interest at heart. However, they have to respect me or things will fall into chaos. I am going to take my ball and go home attitude is not respect.

 

[cmustangsfp]

My wife used to joke me about the Excel spreadsheet I kept when coaching rec ball. I tracked who played where, inning by inning. This way I was covered. I made sure everyone played everywhere and if I had them scheduled to play IF and they didn't show, I reflected it in my worksheets that I had made up for each game. Also if a girl requested to "sit out this inning because I am tired", I documented that as well. It sure helped out when parents complained about playing time. I could defend myself til the cows came home. Also you should have a talk with your league president about this. You should state that they should not be bullied by a parent. Ask "How can we teach our kids to not bully each other, when you let a parent bully the board?" parents like that are a cancer and need to be gotten rid of. It sucks for the girls. You can also tell the mom she can volunteer to coach too. We did have one problem child/parent combo, but were forewarned before the draft, that the coach that selected that child would have to speak to the commisoner in private and if they wanted to return her to the pile, they could. A lot of rec parents just do not understand. It helps if you, as a coach, get some TB experience, if you still want to coach rec. Then you can explain how being in the OF is not punishment. I stopped coaching rec for those exact same reasons. We took a rec all-star team to some TB tourneys and some of the parents just did not understand. The parents of the dual rec/TB girls did.

The only way I will coach rec again is to give my DD's mound time. I loved coaching the girls, but hated dealing with the "rec" mentality parents, who either did not take the time to read the rulebook 42 times like I had, or were trying to teach "baseball" fundamentals to softball girls.