first time coaching

[eddie]

Will coached my first season in our league. We came in 3rd out of 10 teams 6 select znd 4 league teams. Got to coach allstar team because no one had time not the want to do it . Did good finished 3rd over all in the summer circuit. Now fall sesso is coming thought I was going to have a team but now I find out that they are not going to let me coach because they say I disrespect s a board member. At dall sign ups. She decied to tell me that she could coach any team she wznted to and that I should be greatful that she would let me coach in her league. I told her that if that was the case you get your crew I will get mine and we can head to head. I told her anytime day or night my crew would play her. I think what did it was that reminded her that I beat her 3 times during the spring and she did not like it because the team they gave me only had on girl that had played before and all tje test where first timf players for 10u . I found out because one of the girls that was supposed to play for me in fall is going to play for her and she dose not want to but her mother is making her because I beat her team to and they dont think I can do the job. I told her that's fine but at anytime you need help just let me know and I would be there weather you play for her or someone else. After finding out I got in touch with all the other girls told them the same thing . Now I find out that because I did that I my not get to coach in spring season . Will I guess if that is what they want to do then that's the way it will be. Just venting . By the way my DD doesn't want play if I am not coaching . I told her you play and have fun . You play to your best at any place they put you in . Because I will always be there and be proud of her no matter what.

 

[glf0845]

I have always found it useful to be respectful, humble and gracious to board members and other coaches. There were several different ways you could have convinced the board that you were a good coach. Reminding another coach of your win is not going to help your cause. I think you should apologize to the board member for the "misunderstanding". Maybe you could be an AC for the fall, we all have much to learn. Hopefully they will let you coach in the spring. JMHO

 

[SoftSocDad]

I think what did it was that reminded her that I beat her 3 times during the spring and she did not like it....

That's the real problem right there. You're completely mistaken about the role of coaches in the game. The fact that you see youth softball as some 1-on-1 competition between yourself and opposing coaches is the real reason you should not be coaching.

 

[nanotech14]

That's the real problem right there. You're completely mistaken about the role of coaches in the game. The fact that you see youth softball as some 1-on-1 competition between yourself and opposing coaches is the real reason you should not be coaching.

sorry eddie, softsocdad is right on the money with this. It is not about you, it is about the girls. Sure there are teams that you want to beat, thats understandable. But your job is to teach and let the girls play the game. The coaching staff has told OUR girls many of times, Us coaches can show you how to play the game and what to do, but in the end it is up to them, not us. It is a kids game and they will win or lose on their terms not OURS. If WE have done what WERE suppose to do, "teach" then thats all WE can do. WE can't play for them and either can you. This might be what you need, a reminder on who this game is for, not you, but the girls. The "I beat her 3 times" is what I saw to in your post and could not get past that comment. It is not a bad thing for your dd to learn to be coached by someone else. Word of caution on that, let them coach at games and practices, you work with her at home. You can make it hard or easy on your dd, you can sit back and enjoy or be that parent!!! and then it will not be fun for your dd. Sorry

 

[Diamond Junkie]

Eddie you must remember, as others have already said, its not about you. As coaches we are there for the players, not the other way around.

We all have egos to different degrees. Its just natural. But, the egos have to be left aside once you are coaching.

I'll be the first one to admit that I've had disagreements with board members in my area. Too many around here are on the board just so their name will one day be put on something. You have to pick and choose your battles if you wish to stay coaching. Many times I just bite my lip, which believe me is not easy, so as not to rile the powers at be to the point that I am no longer asked back. My love for coaching both boys and girls of all ages trumps almost any disagreement I may have.

Also, remember that wins and losses are not always what a coach is judged on.

Like nanotech said, you can make things harder for you dd. That's not what any parent wants.

 

[eddie]

maybe i should have worded this different. the problem is with them not me. when it all started the did not ask me to coach they told me to coach . i was just going to sit it out and watch mu DD play. instead i coached to help all the other girls that i knew where not going to get picked to play for the other coaches that didnot want them . but now that i want to coach it is not okay to . now that the parents and grils want to play for me and they are calling me to pick them and at signups asking for me not the other two coaches it is okay for them to punish me for that. it is okay for them to disrespect me ,but i am not say anything to them because they are the board.

 

[eddie]

i did not remind them of the loses to me in spring by a team of grils that they did not want to coach. and i understand that the grils come fist that is a given. and as said before to them what ever happends if they play for me or them if they need anything, if they need ride to game or practice or place to stay or eat. me and my family will always be there for them. thats the way it was in spring and that is the way now. that is what i am venting about.

 

[Sparky Guy]

Welcome to rec ball politics at its finest!! You could have kept your mouth shut, smiled, nodded and you STILL would not be coaching. They simply want to do it themselves and you're standing in the way. They had to find an excuse that was unrelated to your coaching because you showed everyone that you could with your team's fall record.

You have two options. Sit back and take it or move on to another situation. It's up to you.

True story. A while back a local MS coach took his team to the state finals and won. During an interview with a reporter after winning he referred to one of his pitchers as the "horse" of the staff for pitching most of the innings. It seems a couple of the school board members didn't like the coach because their DD's didn't see much playing time. They started a huge witch hunt stating the pitcher referred to was "upset" at being called a "horse" and a couple of other BS criticisms about his coaching. They managed to get the coach ousted. He coached a highly successful travel team during the following summer.

 

[Perfect Circle]

Start thinking TB... you can be appreciated for wining by a few more, don't let them wreck you.

 

[eddie]

i have moved on . my DD and 4 of the other girls have moved on they will be playing for a select team that needed help for fall and in spring i will be getting a new team to coach.its all behind me now mad at first but not now just ready to coach.