combined tournament team

[thundermom]

Hi I'm new to the forum. I'll give you a little back story. My daughter has played softball for 7 years. She is always one of the better players on the teams she has played on. Last year she played on a 12u tournament team. My daughter played catcher and 3rd base. Half of the girls (my daughter included) on the 12u team had to move up to 14u this year. The league asked my husband to take the 14u head coach position. My husband contacted a former fall ball coach of my daughter that was looking to start his own tournament team. He had a lot of good players and we like his coaching style and figured our teams combined would be great. They decided to combine teams. Originally we had 2 coaches from our league and 2 coaches from their league. Well.... the other coach from our league decided he wanted his daughter play for a different team because, he wanted the team to play at a B level and we were planing on starting at a C level. SO..... we added another coach from the other league. This was not good because the balance was off from that point on. The other coaches have completely taken over our team. They are making changes without speaking to my husband. They are letting girls start from their side of the team even though they show up 10 min. before a tournament starts while our girls are sitting on the bench and got there on time. Girls are being given positions that they didn't earn. My husband has blown up on them several times (not in front of the team). The other coach always apologizes and admits he was wrong but, he does it again the next tournament. It is very clear that the other coach is favoring his girls above the team. Parents are getting ticked!! We are having as coaches meeting on Thursday. We have asked all the girls parents to send an e-mail stating any problems they would like addressed. Let me tell you there is a few e-mails with the "F" bomb being dropped!! We need advise on how to handle this situation without ruining the rest of the season.

 

[Slappers]

Is your husband in charge of the team? If so, then he needs to take control. One person has to be in charge. It's fine to ask asst coaches for advice and you need to, but ultimately one person has to be the decision maker.

How many girls came from the "other" league? I'm assuming the ticked parents are from "your" league.

If I were you, I would have moved the whole team up to 14u instead of creating a new one. I hate to say it, but I've been through similar situations and I don't see this working out. Hopefully it does but it won't be "right" so to speak.

 

[thundermom]

My Husband and the other coach are trying to co head coach. Obviously it's not working! LOL! I think your right about one person taking control. Since my husband is technically the head coach (he was voted in). He should take charge.

We have 6 from each league plus one from another. 13 girls combined. Which leaves 4 girls on the bench in each game. One of those 4 is injured and not likely to return for about a month. Out of the 6 infield positions "our" girls only have 2 positions (2nd and catch). they only rotate "our" girls in the outfield. Yes the parents from our league are the ones that are ticked. Which happen to be close friends of ours.

The younger players didn't want to move up because the pitchers weren't ready for the pitching distance to change.

It's going to be a long season!!

 

[PA SB Dad]

You are in a tough situation because at this point no solution will keep both sets of parents happy. You have already described the team in terms of your girls and their girls, not "our team". If your DH is now going to make the decisions regarding playing time, there is no way to sugar-coat any reduction in playing time for the "other" girls who had a lot of playing time. If things stay status quo, "your" parents will remain upset and likely quit. Teams implode for many reasons, and the situation you describe would be a pretty good reason why a team might disband.

 

[thundermom]

I am only using the terms "our" and "theirs" to be able to explain better.

We have discussed asking the additional coach we added from the "other" league to step down. We have had several complaints about him. His daughter is one of the girls that has been given a starting position that she doesn't deserve. She has melt downs when she makes a mistake and completely takes herself out of the game and then continues to make more mistakes. This is a huge complaint from both sides.

My husband is actually the only person that puts the girls in positions that are earned and not given. One parent even made a comment that she can tell when my husband has made the line up and game plan because, he is the only one that doesn't show favoritism.

 

[Coach Keith]

Hello- You are in a tough position. There may be no salvaging the team at this point. Favoritism is never a good thing when it comes to coaching at any level. At the 14u level the players should be earning positions and the best players put in those positions. At this point the team needs to decide who the head coach is and all agree on it. You can do this at the meeting or have a ballet vote.

 

[thundermom]

A ballet sounds like a great idea.

 

[SoCal_Dad]

My Husband and the other coach are trying to co head coach. Obviously it's not working! LOL! I think your right about one person taking control. Since my husband is technically the head coach (he was voted in). He should take charge.

The change in assistant coaches shouldn't have changed the way the team operates unless the AC that left was controlling the lineup. Your husband needs to work it out with the other head coach, without the AC's. They need to agree on a way to run the team that keeps it together for the rest of the season.

An election won't result in a solution that works for both groups.

 

[maddball44]

A ballet sounds like a great idea.

The one family not from either league becomes the villain in this scenario. Everyone knows how the other 6 / 6 will vote.

Good luck in your meeting.

 

[29dad]

A ballet sounds like a great idea.

It couldn't hurt!! I recommend Swan Lake. Explain to the parents that the evil black swan represents the co-head coach who schemes and manipulates... oh wait. Maybe you and coach Keith meant ballot, not ballet. Never mind.