Stick with team or look elsewhere

[Itsabouttime]

2nd year 12U tried out for several club teams for the first time. Looking to improve game through better competition and good coaching/training. Settled on a team labeled as A level but initial reaction is that it may not be so - mix of 1st year/2nd year (was hoping for primarily 2nd year), doesn't appear to be A level stud pitcher, don't see any big bats. (not to mention expensive program) Initial thoughts are:

1) Look for another team immediately because I was led to believe that the team is something that it is not and was hoping that my daughter would have to compete for playing time where initial read is that won't be the case

2) Allow the team to come together, rely on the good coaches/training, teach my daughter to be a leader and see how team looks after Fall - then make a decision

3) Ride it out for the entire season with the expectation that my daughter will get better through execellent coaching and training regardless of how many wins and losses the team has

Welcome your opinions.

 

[sru]

Good coaches and training should always be priority at this age. Don't worry about wins and losses, if this is a good developement opportunity for her, I'd stay, at least for the fall. That should give you time enough to form an opinion on the direction of the team, coaches ability and most important, if your kid is enjoying herself.

 

[sluggers]

Newbie parents always worry about the wrong things.

Here are the real questions:

(1) How are the coaches? If the coaches are good, the team at the end of the year will be "A" level. If the coaches are bad, the team at the end of the year will be "C" level. Are the coaches people you can work with?
(2) What is the practice plan for making the team better?
(3) What is the plan for making your DD a better player? Are you assuming the travel coaches are going to make her a better player, or are *YOU* going to make sure she becomes a better player?
(4) How does the team fit with your schedule and her schedule? This something that is so often forgotten about--you are going to be spending a lot of time doing this, so it has to be workable.

 

[jacketsfan]

almost time for my "what exactly is a 12U A team, who has a big bat in 12U, and what is a killer pitcher at 12U" rant. it seems like a big deal now, but trust me, you will laugh that those things got said a few years from now.

12U is about learning - winning is fun, but 12U is not fantasy softball or college recruiting. it is about teaching kids to play. pick a team that she will learn to play, that the coaches are not jerks, and that she'll have fun.

of course, i get amused that people actually travel to attend asa 12U or 10U nationals too, so that's just me i suppose.

 

[PA SB Dad]

From what you posted, it sounds like your daughter will get good coaching and training, which is the most important softball-related stuff she will get out of this year. The other thing to consider is that if you leave now or in the middle of the year, what then? What if the team she moves to is also not what she (or you) thought it was going to be? Are you setting her up to be a kid that jumps ship easily if she is not satisfied with the current position of the team? If she changes teams now or mid-season, and is dissatisfied with her next choice, it will be impossible to change teams again without carrying the label of "difficult player" or "difficult parent", no matter how many reasons/excuses you try to come up with to explain it. There is something to be said for living with a "bad" decision and making the best of it, especially at this age, where you have no idea how good the team will be in the spring based on what you see now. If it is truly unbearable, and you find that the coaches are dishonest or unethical, I am all for moving on and getting your child away from an environment like that. Otherwise, I would try to learn from this and make the best of the situation. Your daughter and her teammates might surprise you.

 

[Goobie]

Similar situation with my DD in her 2nd year at 12U. She moved "up" to an "A" level program and was very excited to get the call after tryouts that she had made the team. When I took here to the first meet-and-greet she found out that there were only two 2nd year 12's (including her) and the rest had just moved up from 10's. The excitement of being part of a highly respected "A" program quickly faded. The girls were tiny! After talking with the head of the program, he convinced us that the program would provide the coaching necessary to get the girls better. We were told the team might struggle in the fall, but by spring they would be competitive.

Well... it didn't happen. The team did in fact struggle mightily in the fall. They also struggled all summer long. The "coaching" that was promised wasn't really provided. The team manager did his best, but he just wasn't able to get it done. The head of the program spent his time with the older 21U team leaving the younger team to struggle. The team played a highly competitive "A" schedule and got it handed to them most of the time. It was not fun to watch.

Were there any good points? Yes. My daughter got to pitch a lot! She pitched almost every inning of every game in a 70+ game season. The only other pitcher was a very small 1st year 12 and she struggled. Add in the fact that the defense would commit what seemed like one or two errors per inning.. and my daughter got to pitch even more. She pitched against the best 12U "A's" in the state and had to develop ways to induce the easy out. Unfortunately since she had to pitch almost every inning, she had no time to work on other infield / outfield positions. She has been working hard these past two years to catch up in those areas.

Looking back, the biggest issue I struggle with is the fact that I recognized early at the first meeting that the team wasn't all that it was advertised as and I didn't act then. I let the head of the organization convince me that it would be OK without nailing him down to exactly what was going to be done to ensure success. My daughter had other offers to play on other teams (Mostly "B" teams) that competed well but wanted the "A" experience. This program had two 12U teams. My daughter made the 2nd team. The first team got a lot of attention from the head of the program and coaches. They were all 2nd year 12's and competed at the higher level.

If your daughter made the only 12U team in the organization (or the 2nd year team since your daughter is 2nd year) and they have the coaches, players, and parents that are willing to commit the time and effort to getting better... It might work out for you. If on the other hand your daughter made the 2nd 12U team at the organization and it was at team that they decided to add to the program since they had enough players tryout, then I would be very cautious. As others have said... I wouldn't focus on wins or losses. I would focus on the coaching and the commitment of the program to the team. Remember 12U is that weird age group where the difference between 1st year 12's and 2nd year 12's is dramatic in both skill and size.

btw... my daughter stuck it out all year with the team. The next year she decided to tryout at different organizations. Nobody came up to her and said "you did a great thing sticking with that other team all year even though they struggled... Here take a spot on our team since you are such a nice person." Nobody said that. They simply looked at her abilities and compared her to the others at the tryouts. If you do decide to stick it out and the coaches don't live up to expectations, remember that YOU will need to spend even more time throughout the season working not only on her physical game but also the mental parts of her game as she potentially loses enthusiasm for the game.

Just my thoughts and experience. May not be right for everyone.

 

[sballsally]

Do you want to win or do you want her to play? Last year my daughter played on an awesome A team but was the 3rd catcher behind two HS catchers so she spent most of her time playing right field, when she did play. She learned a lot about the game sitting the bench, but this year we went with a B team and she's their #1 catcher so she's going to get a lot of catching experience. The B team is what she needs right now. Last year she needed the A team, to learn what it was like "not to be the best on the team" and to improve her softball IQ. Let's see if she applies what she learned to make her B team an A team!

 

[constancemarie]

I get it though that you want your kid to be competitive. It's not just about enjoying game necessarily. Yes, of course we all want that, but sometimes it's about building confidence. Good coaching may or may not provide that. Hopefully it will. Getting play time but having to work with her team and compete for a better position, more time at bat, et cetra will help her in other areas of her life.

 

[InsidePitch]

and what is a killer pitcher at 12U" rant

No S..., I saw a 1st year 12 pitch a perfect game in a 14U tournament. No hits, walks or errors. This girl is awesome and every team knows of her and wants her. DD caught her one game and I commented to DD, you looked pretty good back there. LOL, Dad, it's easy when everything is a strike. This 12 had 5 real pitches according to DD including a knuckle ball.

 

[Lothar241]

btw... my daughter stuck it out all year with the team. The next year she decided to tryout at different organizations. Nobody came up to her and said "you did a great thing sticking with that other team all year even though they struggled... Here take a spot on our team since you are such a nice person." Nobody said that. They simply looked at her abilities and compared her to the others at the tryouts.

In my neck of the woods I was surprised by how many coaches know other players and coaches in the surrounding communities. My daughter just latched onto a new team and with speaking with the coach of her previous team (no burned bridges, just didn't feel team was right for her) he knew a majority of the girls on the team and a few coaches.

I would say feel free to move, but don't bad mouth the organization that you just left.