My DW said that DD was really emotional on the ride home after senior night last night... and we only have one senior. That one of her teammates - who she really, really likes - can't come back and play with her again ever - even if she wanted to - really hit her hard.
Do you think you are helping your dd?
- Thread starter Cannonball
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My DW said that DD was really emotional on the ride home after senior night last night... and we only have one senior. That one of her teammates - who she really, really likes - can't come back and play with her again ever - even if she wanted to - really hit her hard.
Cannonball, I have a lot of respect for you and several others on this site. I look to this site for guidence on different topics. I have refrained from the HS rants this season even tho it's no better than the others. I wold bet that the coaches on here are the better coaches and the parents on here are the better parents. If I ask something on here like most people it is specific. CoachE's forum " how do you xxxx" when you and others all agree that the solution is yyyy then I take it apply it and I'll be damned it worked and simple as that. Pitching forum same thing, I ask and Pauly, boardmember, java etc reply I take and apply same thing happens. A lot of what your talking about is uninformed people. Coaches teaching things that have been disproved and parents know better. Coaches up to date but parents friend from the 60s says back when my DD played we squished bugs and the parents take it to heart.
Parents and coaches also see thru th BS the other lays out. HS coach "I took a team to substate 2yrs in a row" . Parents thinking yep who couldn't with a team like that. They probably got there despite the coaching. Parents "my DD hit .900 in rec last yr" HS coach thinking yep slow pitch is usually a high BA.
And I did try to get dd to skip this season but like a lot of them it's her chance to play with, instead of against several of her friends.
Parents and coaches also see thru th BS the other lays out. HS coach "I took a team to substate 2yrs in a row" . Parents thinking yep who couldn't with a team like that. They probably got there despite the coaching. Parents "my DD hit .900 in rec last yr" HS coach thinking yep slow pitch is usually a high BA.
And I did try to get dd to skip this season but like a lot of them it's her chance to play with, instead of against several of her friends.
Many posters have pointed out that HS softball is often a way for the girls to learn to deal with imperfect situations, such as learning to deal with a sub-optimal coach is similar to learning to deal with a sub-optimal boss. But then, the bosses I've had in my life have ranged from fantastic to completely abusive. If one of my kids ever had a HS coach as bad as some of the bosses I've had, the question would be whether my first stop would be at the AD's office to get the coach fired, or if I would grab an old bat for a talk with the coach first.
As it is, I still have some disagreements as to how the program is run. I asked DD 3 on a number of occasions whether she wants to quit, and she says no. She hasn't decided if she will return next year, or else try the track program instead. I am hoping the good parts of HS softball will outweigh the bad parts for her. Part of her growing up.
If every parent who had disagreements as to how a program was being run took their kids out of the program, we wouldn't have much in the way of HS sports in this country.
As it is, I still have some disagreements as to how the program is run. I asked DD 3 on a number of occasions whether she wants to quit, and she says no. She hasn't decided if she will return next year, or else try the track program instead. I am hoping the good parts of HS softball will outweigh the bad parts for her. Part of her growing up.
If every parent who had disagreements as to how a program was being run took their kids out of the program, we wouldn't have much in the way of HS sports in this country.
I was that parent last week....
I've been part of the coaching staff - in one capacity or another - on every team my DD has played on, starting with 8U rec ball. I continue to educate myself on the game of softball. Not only to help my DD improve her game, but also to be an effective part of the coaching staff for her 12U TB team. So far, people seem to like what I do. I also know my DD's swing, how she process instructions, and the things that piss her off better than anyone else on the planet.
Now it's time for middle school ball. Although I was invited to be an AC, I can't make the time commitment, and so - for the first time - I'm just a parent. I'm not even running the scorebook. It's quite nice.
At the MS team's first game last week, when my DD came in off the field after her first AB (a hard ground ball single up the middle), I walked over to the dugout to offer her a piece of hitting advice based on something I had seen in her swing. She looked me and said, "If you want to coach, you need to be in the dugout".
She was right.
I went and sat down next to my wife and enjoyed the rest of the game.
I've been part of the coaching staff - in one capacity or another - on every team my DD has played on, starting with 8U rec ball. I continue to educate myself on the game of softball. Not only to help my DD improve her game, but also to be an effective part of the coaching staff for her 12U TB team. So far, people seem to like what I do. I also know my DD's swing, how she process instructions, and the things that piss her off better than anyone else on the planet.
Now it's time for middle school ball. Although I was invited to be an AC, I can't make the time commitment, and so - for the first time - I'm just a parent. I'm not even running the scorebook. It's quite nice.
At the MS team's first game last week, when my DD came in off the field after her first AB (a hard ground ball single up the middle), I walked over to the dugout to offer her a piece of hitting advice based on something I had seen in her swing. She looked me and said, "If you want to coach, you need to be in the dugout".
She was right.
I went and sat down next to my wife and enjoyed the rest of the game.
No parent instruction/coaching during games!
No parents in dugout!
No parents in dugout!
Cannonball
Ex "Expert"
- Feb 25, 2009
- 4,880
- 113
I don't know you or your dd so keep that in mind with this response. I can tell you that 90%+ of the girls that I get to coach don't know a thing about the game. That would include those that play for some of the top programs in our area. They don't know their cuts, pivots at 2nd, how to bunt properly, game strategy and how to pitch hitters, ... Their parents would say 100% of the time that they do. I coach more fundamentals in one week than their TB programs do in a summer. I'll leave out my thoughts on all of the hitting experts out there.
The HS Coach also is the one who writes out the lineup. So there is that.
Cannonball
Ex "Expert"
- Feb 25, 2009
- 4,880
- 113
I appreciate your perspective. Keep in mind that I am venting in an opposing way to others who are venting about HS Coaches. However, I made this thread to point out the reality that parents get their dds cut the following season due to their intrusive behaviors. I don't intend to defend all HS Coaches here. Still, the reality is that no one, including me, wants those parents around that will cause conflict no matter how good the dd is. I know right now that I am headed for a train wreck because I will not deviate from what I do. In fact, I sat down with the AD today telling him what is about to happen. It will be real ugly. I feel for the dds.
Nor should you. Given the sum total content of all your input here, I think I speak for most here on DFP when I say that YOU (Cannonball) are a far better HS coach than many here experience, possibly in the top 10 percent.
Also, it has been my experience that parents are, on average, problematic with regards to interfering with, what should be, the coach's responsibilities. It's just a matter of degree.
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