Sportsmanship issue?

[JJsqueeze]

Why? If I don't know the answer to something, I'll ask. It's much better than assuming to know everything. I don't mind asking a stupid question as long as I'm not stupid by NOT asking a question.

yeah...no bad questions and all that, but sometimes questions speak volumes about a person's thinking. All I'm saying is this is surprising because it is a very basic sportsmanship question and the answer is simply NO, it is not all right to do this. The fact that this is even a question just seems like maybe you draw the line on sportsmanship in a place where behavior like this is in the realm of being acceptable, and that is a little surprising to me.

 

[dadofadirtlover]

yeah...no bad questions and all that, but sometimes questions speak volumes about a person's thinking. All I'm saying is this is surprising because it is a very basic sportsmanship question and the answer is simply NO, it is not all right to do this. The fact that this is even a question just seems like maybe you draw the line on sportsmanship in a place where behavior like this is in the realm of being acceptable, and that is a little surprising to me.

As I stated earlier, in the basketball world of 20 years ago when I played, that isn't bad sportsmanship. It was actually congratulated as being defensively saavy. In softball, based on the DIFFERENT sport, instead of assuming what is proper decorum, I asked. Instead of reading that at the onset, you assumed it speaks to my sportsmanship. I already told DD that it was probably not right, but I would ask. I ask and now I don't draw the line appropriately? But, potentially injuring my 9DD is the appropriate response? That speaks volumes....alot more than your assumptions!

 

[AndyS]

As I stated earlier, in the basketball world of 20 years ago when I played, that isn't bad sportsmanship. It was actually congratulated as being defensively saavy. In softball, based on the DIFFERENT sport, instead of assuming what is proper decorum, I asked. Instead of reading that at the onset, you assumed it speaks to my sportsmanship. I already told DD that it was probably not right, but I would ask. I ask and now I don't draw the line appropriately? But, potentially injuring my 9DD is the appropriate response? That speaks volumes....alot more than your assumptions!

Agreed. This is a great place to ask these kind of questions. The good news is you will usually get very good answers but you will also have to suffer through people who are holier than thou. I think you saw that in spades with your question. Those people always crack me up and I would LOVE to see how well they live up to their holier than thou attitudes in real life. Anybody who has even a modicum of honesty will admit we all had basic questions and made soooo many mistakes. At least I did. I applaud you for asking and like I say just ignore the know-it-alls who apparently live perfect lives. Good luck to you and your DD.

 

[JJsqueeze]

As I stated earlier, in the basketball world of 20 years ago when I played, that isn't bad sportsmanship. It was actually congratulated as being defensively saavy. In softball, based on the DIFFERENT sport, instead of assuming what is proper decorum, I asked. Instead of reading that at the onset, you assumed it speaks to my sportsmanship. I already told DD that it was probably not right, but I would ask. I ask and now I don't draw the line appropriately? But, potentially injuring my 9DD is the appropriate response? That speaks volumes....alot more than your assumptions!

Where do you get potentially injuring a 9 year old? I didn't say a thing about anything like that. I would never say to retaliate against a 9 year old. as for the line drawing, you said things like "I told her it was probably not a good idea but you would ask and tell her if you hear differently" and I am saying so what if you did? This is not really even a softball question, it is a basic parenting question, it speaks to how we approach drawing lines for our kids. Do we draw them based on the LCD of what people say is acceptable or do we have a core set of values that we stick to regardless of what people say? All I am saying is that this question falls under the category of "things we teach our kids regardless of what others say" and not in the "things we teach our kids based on acceptable social norms".

 

[Cannonball]

You asked a question and did get an answer along with some thoughts as to what would really happen if your dd did this. That doesn't mean that any poster here would have their pitcher do it. For many of us, and I think the point many are trying to make, is that this situation would have been an immediate no to the dd. When I read your OP my first thought after "no" was that this would be against the rules but that doesn't mean that it would be called consistently by all umpires. Instead, it might just be a better idea to ask oneself if any action seems to be suspect with regards to sportsmanship then steer away from it.

BTW, I would speculate that most of our dds are "highly competitive." At least mine is. LOL!

 

[dadofadirtlover]

Where do you get potentially injuring a 9 year old? I didn't say a thing about anything like that. I would never say to retaliate against a 9 year old. as for the line drawing, you said things like "I told her it was probably not a good idea but you would ask and tell her if you hear differently" and I am saying so what if you did? This is not really even a softball question, it is a basic parenting question, it speaks to how we approach drawing lines for our kids. Do we draw them based on the LCD of what people say is acceptable or do we have a core set of values that we stick to regardless of what people say? All I am saying is that this question falls under the category of "things we teach our kids regardless of what others say" and not in the "things we teach our kids based on acceptable social norms".

You personally didn't mention this, but the comment about a fastball to the arm, knees, etc. was. That image was still in my head when responding to you (sorry for the unnecessary fire on that point). I'll state this again. In basketball, the only sport I know inside and out, the equivalent was NOT bush league. It was congratulated. That doesn't speak negatively about my societal outlook or my parenting. The reason I told my DD that it probably is not a good idea, but I would find out and let her know is because I don't purport to know everything to my DD. I only tell her what I know as fact. As a direct result, she knows that when I tell her something is fact, she trusts it. That's just how I decide to parent. I'm a huge rule advocate in anything. So, instead of running to the first google search result, I sought out experts that I have access to THROUGH an LCD. So instead of thinking of my basketball ways, I erred on the side of caution and told my DD correctly that it probably isn't a good idea. That's not a knock on social norms. That's just an exposure of my ignorance of the rules of SB and the beauty of our technological advances to speed up the learning process and shorten the learning curve. In basketball, I can think of more than 10 different things that you are not just allowed to do, but encouraged to do at every level that has a sole purpose of confusing the opponent mid-shot, mid-pass, etc. The rules allow for it. In SB, they don't. It's just as simple as that.

Following your logic, the entire sport of basketball teaches kids to operate based on unacceptable social norms? All I did was request a cure for my ignorance about a situation in SB. Not have my parenting or social outlook on trial.

 

[dadofadirtlover]

You asked a question and did get an answer along with some thoughts as to what would really happen if your dd did this. That doesn't mean that any poster here would have their pitcher do it. For many of us, and I think the point many are trying to make, is that this situation would have been an immediate no to the dd. When I read your OP my first thought after "no" was that this would be against the rules but that doesn't mean that it would be called consistently by all umpires. Instead, it might just be a better idea to ask oneself if any action seems to be suspect with regards to sportsmanship then steer away from it.

BTW, I would speculate that most of our dds are "highly competitive." At least mine is. LOL!

Honestly, before asking the question, I was looking through the only athletic eyes I know and I can remember COUNTLESS times where I was going up for a rebound and the opponent yelled "same team same team" and I backed down and costs my team possessions and I did the same to them. Ref standing right there with nothing to say because it wasn't a sportsmanship issue. I didn't see one as any different than the other. With SB being such a different sport, though, I can (NOW) see how that is utterly wrong to do. I didn't see that until DFP cured my wrong thinking, though. I think the point is that not everyone thinks about things the same way, which is why there are rules to be adhered to. Rules my DD can (and already have) read and be sure she understands why.

 

[JJsqueeze]

Following your logic, the entire sport of basketball teaches kids to operate based on unacceptable social norms? All I did was request a cure for my ignorance about a situation in SB. Not have my parenting or social outlook on trial.

I'm no sure sure about that basketball comment, I played through High School and I can't think of anything unsportsmanlike I was encouraged to do. I remember my HS coach stressing teamwork, passing, defense and sportsmanship.

 

[dadofadirtlover]

I'm no sure sure about that basketball comment, I played through High School and I can't think of anything unsportsmanlike I was encouraged to do. I remember my HS coach stressing teamwork, passing, defense and sportsmanship.

I wasn't asked to do anything unsportsmanlike, either. My point is "confusing the opponent" was not considered unsportsmanlike. Pushing someone out of bounds when the ref wasn't looking is unsportsmanlike. Elbowing someone down low when "fighting for a rebound" was unsportsmanlike. Clapping your hands while they were trying to shoot or pass was not. Yelling "same team" or "ball" or "rebound" wasn't. Never was considered unsportsmanlike when I played. This was the same "type" of thing as yelling "mine" to the infielder. Again, different sport. Different rules. It's unsportsmanlike to break rules period.

 

[Cannonball]

dad, wasn't the yelling of "ball" to signify that you had the ball? I could kind of play once upon a time myself and have won a few hundred games as a coach. The difference in yelling ball in the two scenarios is that one is to let teammates know you have the rebound and in the other is to deceive the defensive player. I can't think of a time in basketball where I yelled at the offensive player in an attempt to deceive them. Yelling "shot" was to let teammates know that the ball was in the air and to block out. Again, no attempt to deceive the offensive player and the ball was released. (I'm hoping no one yelled "shot" trying to scare the shooter as you just might be victimized by a shot fake and drive if the offensive player has any skills.) Anyway, good discussion. Good luck to your dd. You'll find out that there are a lot of good guys here and some will hack you off once in a while but are still good guys.