My daughter made the cut & her daughter didn't! How to deal with the complaining?

[SSmom83]

We had our travel team tryouts last Sunday... got the call last night that my daughter made the 12u travel team (yeah!). A friend called me last night to see if my daughter made the team.... her's did not! They play together on Jr High ball & she is baffled as to why her daughter didn't make it.
I do know it was close for the coaches (I am friends with them as well), they stated there was really only 1 girl that they could say didn't do well, the others were so close they came up with a formula for the cuts (had to cut 3 girls).
Didn't have this issue last year in 10u team (which both my girl & her's played on) - we had to search for girls to play. This is the first year for 12u travel team & first cut for our girls too.
My daughters class is the biggest class for our Grade School in over 10 years. Our entire 7th Grade Softball Team is 6th graders, etc.
How do you support your friend in a situation like this?

 

[Amy in AZ.]

What position does the girl play? I mean maybe they had 2 better 3rd baseman or something.

 

[shockcoach]

How do you support your friend in a situation like this?

It is what it is. Don't try to justify it and don't get any information from the coaches on their decision. It's best to remain neutral and ignorant.

 

[sluggers]

How do you support your friend in a situation like this?

Do a lot of smiling and nodding...don't offer suggestions, don't make observations, etc. Just listen. I wouldn't be smug about it.

TRUE STORY: A boy grew up two doors down from us. His dad wanted him to be a star athlete. He didn't have what it takes. At some point, the coach told the kid that he was off the team. So, that kid took up acting. He now is the star of a TV sitcom, and makes a lot more money that any of the kids that did make the team.

 

[SoftSocDad]

Team business involving other players' tryouts is not your business. You can say you enjoy watching her DD play, but I'd avoid conversations of any length about your DD's current team or about the selection process. As far as she's concerned, you have no idea how the players were selected. If her DD loves to play, I am sure she'll be fine.

 

[howellhandmade]

You don't *have* to deal with the complaining. That would be your friend's husband's job. : )

 

[SSmom83]

It is what it is. Don't try to justify it and don't get any information from the coaches on their decision. It's best to remain neutral and ignorant.

Oh I can play ignorant just like the next person! lol
She is a good player, great hitter - just may not have been her day at tryouts... I was just put in the situation on the phone of "why do you think she didn't make it?" I was speechless & just said "I was watching my daughter play, I didn't watch yours". And I fully expect to see her several times in the future & wanted your opinions on a response. I agree, I shouldn't have to answer why - especially since it wasn't my decision.
Thanks guys!

 

[Goobie]

just said "I was watching my daughter play, I didn't watch yours".

I think your answer is perfect. Leave it at that!