How do handle if you have issues with parents??

[ahiggins1804]

Would like to hear some suggestions on what others have done in the past with parents that can be negative at times.

Here is my situtation: I'm a asst coach for a team and the head coach has an issue with one of the girls parents ( from what the head coach told me another parent told him that her parents had a issue on how he coaches paractices that the girls do to much standing around)
This girl is by far our best catcher and has a big bat, but instead of the head coach addressing the problem with the parents he sits her on the bench and only lets her catch the tough games until we get out ahead, he continues to have her in the starting line up to hit also. I can see her parents continue to get more aggravated as this continues. I told him I would talk with the parents and workout the issues but he hasn't. I fill for this girl because she doesn't understand what she done wrong and has asked the coach why she is getting as much playing time and his answer to her is "Im just seeing which catcher wants it more"

How would you handle this?

 

[Amy in AZ.]

Can you describe a practice? There may actually be too much standing around. I do know this much, a young lady should not be punished because of her parents. A coach either wants her on the team or he doesn't. If I am the parent of a #1 catcher, good teams are easy to come by.

It sounds like the head coach doesn't want to hear from you. It puts you in a difficult position.

 

[GunnerShotgun]

How would you handle this?

I would take my daughter and find a new team.

 

[InsidePitch]

As the AC do you think there is to much standing around? Do you see a cluster of girls talking for 5 minutes while other girls perform a drill? IF yes then there is to much standing around. From what you describe, it sounds like the HC is the problem adult in this scenario.

Saying there is to much standing around is a common issue with parents. I have that issue sometimes and will tell the coach there is to much standing around. Either get some help or make a better plan. I pay to much money and go to a lot of trouble to make sure my kid is at each practice and on time for her to be standing around.

 

[medicpelle]

I told him I would talk with the parents and workout the issues but he hasn't.

I'm confused by this statement. Whom is talking to whom?

Secondly there seems to be a lot of second and third party information being exchanged which typically tends to muddy the water on whats actually happening or being said. It's real simple, both the HC and parents are adults ( Well at least by age definition) and all parties need to have a sit down and communicate. Hash out what needs to be hashed out and move on. If you need to be there as a mediator then so be it. The problem will not solve itself and the only one truly suffering is the player. Fact is if it's not dealt with immediately a division will form with the parents then with the players.

 

[Momo'sDad]

Would like to hear some suggestions on what others have done in the past with parents that can be negative at times.

Here is my situtation: I'm a asst coach for a team and the head coach has an issue with one of the girls parents ( from what the head coach told me another parent told him that her parents had a issue on how he coaches paractices that the girls do to much standing around)

Stop right there.

After you and the HC speak, you both need to talk to the parent(s) at the same time. You cannot really establish a plan of action until you all share an understanding of what the concerns are. Based on what you've written here, there seems to be too much of a gap in communication.

 

[ahiggins1804]

I agree with the parents and have mentioned to him about having more productive practices he thinks the girls are getting what they need. The big issue with the standing around problem is he is trying to coach the orgs 8u, 12u and 14u all at the same practice and doesn't like others helping out.

Also i feel like if this catcher leaves we're going to lose our ace pitcher who also has a big bat because the parents of the two are good friends and the pitchers parents have already said something about why isn't she catching because that is the reason they came to the team for their DD to be with a good catcher that can handle their DD's pitching.

This is getting to be to much drama for me I believe the HC is letting his ego get in the way of us having a very good season.

 

[ahiggins1804]

I agree Momo's dad there is a communication gap and the gap is he doesn't want to take any suggestions. He has one of those I'm always right attitudes.

 

[Sweet Lou]

I agree with the parents and have mentioned to him about having more productive practices he thinks the girls are getting what they need. The big issue with the standing around problem is he is trying to coach the orgs 8u, 12u and 14u all at the same practice and doesn't like others helping out.

Huge problem right there. He has too much on his plate and doesn't delegate. That will cause problems with ALL 3 teams.

Also i feel like if this catcher leaves we're going to lose our ace pitcher who also has a big bat because the parents of the two are good friends and the pitchers parents have already said something about why isn't she catching because that is the reason they came to the team for their DD to be with a good catcher that can handle their DD's pitching.

This is getting to be to much drama for me I believe the HC is letting his ego get in the way of us having a very good season.

Sounds like you need to take this to the HC and the parents ASAP or your team is going to fall apart quickly.

 

[FP26]

Stop right there.

After you and the HC speak, you both need to talk to the parent(s) at the same time. You cannot really establish a plan of action until you all share an understanding of what the concerns are. Based on what you've written here, there seems to be too much of a gap in communication.

I agree with this. There is some very good advice in another thread (something about a Rogue Assistant Coach). But it is important to realize that sometime it is the HC that can be the problem. First thing to do is get all of the coaches together to discuss the situation, and then bring in the parents with concerns. The coaches all need to be on the same page, and the parents need to have faith in the direction of the team/organization. Without those things, you could be headed for problems. Good luck. Hopefully the HC can see that the players are the most important part of the equation.