Changing Teams

[gunslinger]

My DD has played for the same team/coach for the past two years. As with any team, girls have come and gone, but the main core of 5-6 players has remained. We've developed many friendships with the core families as well as the new ones.

At the end of the fall season, I began seeing postings for new teams/organizations. I decided to take my DD to a tryout and she was offered a spot with a new organization. As a family, we decided that it would be best for her to pursue this new opportunity. She is very excited about playing, although she knows she will miss her closest teamates from her old team.

I spoke with her old coach, whom I've become good friends with outside of ball, the day after we decided to change teams and told him that we felt it was a good opportunity for her. He said that he was happy for her and that there were no hard feelings.

Now, I've come to find out that another member of my DD's old team also tried out and when the coach found out about her, he had a totally different attitude with her parent. It seems that the old team is feeling that they have been deceived and that we should have let them know about our intentions.

Is this a common dilema that others face when deciding to try out or leave your current team?

 

[James Smith]

IDK, it depends on why they are moving. I know we have had some bad feelings because of some of the reasons, other times it is a congratulations and best luck. You know where we are at if it doesn’t work out, nothing to do with the player’s ability.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

This is just another episode on the soap opera we all live in called "Days of out travel softball lives".....

 

[Bouldersdad]

Or..... As the softball turns.....

 

[95mustang]

I've been one of those coaches that have had girls leave and it stinks. I understand that in the world of travel softball kids come and go, but it still stings when one of your girls that has been with you for multiple years feels the grass is greener somewhere else. I recently lost a pitcher to another team which was okay I understood, until I found out that she was actively recruiting girls from the team for her new team. I lost 2 more from the recruitment which caused us to have to pull out of two tournaments we had scheduled. So I can understand how the coach feels.

 

[James Smith]

Heck yes my DD is going to recruit her old teammates! Nothing you can do about it. There is a time to make the break though, there is no reason to leave the old Team in a bind.

 

[SCDad]

After 12U it becomes every young lady for themselves.

Feelings get hurt, things get said that should not be said.

It all works itself out in a couple of years.

After 12U, the great players have teams in their ear. The others don't. DO WHAT IS BEST FOR DD.

Always be pleasant. Don't enter into the fray. Don"t apologize either. There is too much on the line.

 

[DOG310]

DO WHAT IS BEST FOR DD.

This is the bottom line. Often, it is a matter of levels of commitment. Some are more serious about another sport or activity, while others are all about softball. My DD fell into the latter category and wanted to move forward along a different path than her teammates.

Nothing wrong with either choice.

 

[CoogansBluff]

DO WHAT IS BEST FOR DD.

I think we have to be careful when that is our default for every situation. And I'm not implying this is what this quote was meant to communicate.

But ...

''My daughter is committed to this team and we're halfway into the season, but this showcase team wants her right now, and we're leaving because that's what's best for DD.''

''This showcase team really needs a third baseman, and DD's best friend is committed to another team, but let's talk her into screwing her current team to make DD's new team better because that's what's best for DD.''

''Team A wants a commitment by Tuesday, so we'll commit, but secretly we're still trying out for three other teams because that's what's best for DD.''

''I'm a coach and my DD is a decent shortstop, and a really good shortstop shows up for tryouts and wants to join my team, but I'm looking for an outfielder instead because that's what's best for DD.''

So IMO, it's about doing the right thing, whether that's best for DD or not.

 

[mosftballdad]

My DD was one that left a team where the coach thought he had her locked up. I made it clear what we were looking for going forward and the girls that showed up to try outs were no where near the level we were looking for. She did go to another try out with a good organization and loved the try out and the coach. She called immediately after the try outs on Sunday and offered her a spot. The opportunity was too good to pass up.

The coach was pissed because we left and his other pitcher left (two separate teams). Lots of nasty stuff was said about both girls and parents. We both let it slide and several months later after the wounds have healed some things are better and calmer heads have prevailed. It is the way of travel ball...nothing personal...it's all business.