- Jun 1, 2015
- 501
- 43
Long post ahead - apologies for those in advance that don't like chapter books:
Back Story - 16U "rec" team (MWF games each week, no tournaments). "F" is a 12 year old on the team (one of 3) - been there since the start - was cautioned going in that she was likely to see the least playing time because of her age/abilities. Usually plays RF as a Flex because her bat is the worst on the team - 10 AB, 10 Ks this year (mostly looking). "Mostly" committed, though lacks focus (not paying attention during instruction, sitting on the field, drawing in the dirt, etc.). I'm the ONLY coach for this team (no ACs at all).
Last week, I lost 3 girls (2 injuries, 1 vacation), so I asked 2 nearby varsity players to join the team as initially guest players (1 or 2 games) to get us through the week. They agreed - did a very respectful job in their roles - and the team asked to have them come on to finish out the season. They do what I ask, no attitude, 100% respectful - bust their rear to make all the games/practices we have, even after joining the team later compared to everyone else, whereas some of my girls I've had all year dog it in practice, don't listen in games, etc.
This puts me at 13 girls (something this team has legit NEVER dealt with - usually I have 10 or 11 at the most), so I'm trying to rotate my 5 weaker players appropriately - all outfielders - my Achilles' Heel, defensively. The 2 girls that came on play LCF and RCF, so I usually have 2 outfielders (one as a Flex with a DP), so only 2 have to sit. (We adjust our rules for this league so we can have 4 outfielders at once - modified HS rules).
Last night, our team finished the last 25 minutes of a rained-out game and then scrimmaged the same team after for extra practice. "F" was in the original game lineup. I subbed her and another girl out for the 2 newer girls because we trailed by 1 run and the girls' focus was "we're close enough to win, we do what it takes to win". These 2 who subbed OUT were pulled because they played in a game Tuesday night, and the two that sat Tuesday night were IN the original lineup. They are told, "You're coming out JUST for this 25 minutes so X and Y can get in to help us, then everyone bats/fields in the scrimmage" which was true. We go on to tie the game. When the scrimmage begins, as I go to talk to everyone about the setup, etc., "F" tells me she's "leaving" (no prior notice of this), just has her bag/bat and headed out.
She walks away, and her father comes over (about 20 feet away, outside the dugout), in front of everyone, and blurts out, "SO IS SHE SITTING THE BENCH FRIDAY?" - "I don't know, why?" - "I NEED TO KNOW IF IT'S WORTH MY GAS MONEY TO GO FRIDAY IF SHE'S GOING TO SIT." - "I will decide on my lineup on Friday like I generally do - I'm the coach, this is my team, and I make the decisions on who plays/who doesn't." - "THIS AIN'T YOUR TEAM." - "Excuse me?" - I SAID THIS AIN'T YOUR TEAM - THESE PARENTS CONTRIBUTE A LOT TO THIS - IT AIN'T YOUR TEAM." ...and he and "F" walk off. My girls just stared at me like deer in headlights. The scrimmage was quiet after that for the most part. I later round out the father told her when the game was done and we were picking up the dugout to "Grab your ****, we're leaving".
Now with 13 girls, I'm not sure what is appropriate to do about playing time for "F" for our game on Friday. My parents/players sign "Codes of Conduct" that specifically state that playing time can be diminished/suspended for acts by the parents deemed "detrimental to the success/stability of the team" - I don't want to go that route and never have before - this is the FIRST parent issue that's come up all year, but a.) I've never been embarrassed like that before publicly, b.) "F"'s bat would do no good toward bringing us a win (we are 2-6-1, with 4 games to go), c.) She'd be one of the top 2 or 3 of girls I'd sit just based on effort/talent.
Any other coaches have situations somewhat like this? How DID and/or how WOULD you handle it? Thanks in advance if you made it all the way here - have a cookie and relax.
Back Story - 16U "rec" team (MWF games each week, no tournaments). "F" is a 12 year old on the team (one of 3) - been there since the start - was cautioned going in that she was likely to see the least playing time because of her age/abilities. Usually plays RF as a Flex because her bat is the worst on the team - 10 AB, 10 Ks this year (mostly looking). "Mostly" committed, though lacks focus (not paying attention during instruction, sitting on the field, drawing in the dirt, etc.). I'm the ONLY coach for this team (no ACs at all).
Last week, I lost 3 girls (2 injuries, 1 vacation), so I asked 2 nearby varsity players to join the team as initially guest players (1 or 2 games) to get us through the week. They agreed - did a very respectful job in their roles - and the team asked to have them come on to finish out the season. They do what I ask, no attitude, 100% respectful - bust their rear to make all the games/practices we have, even after joining the team later compared to everyone else, whereas some of my girls I've had all year dog it in practice, don't listen in games, etc.
This puts me at 13 girls (something this team has legit NEVER dealt with - usually I have 10 or 11 at the most), so I'm trying to rotate my 5 weaker players appropriately - all outfielders - my Achilles' Heel, defensively. The 2 girls that came on play LCF and RCF, so I usually have 2 outfielders (one as a Flex with a DP), so only 2 have to sit. (We adjust our rules for this league so we can have 4 outfielders at once - modified HS rules).
Last night, our team finished the last 25 minutes of a rained-out game and then scrimmaged the same team after for extra practice. "F" was in the original game lineup. I subbed her and another girl out for the 2 newer girls because we trailed by 1 run and the girls' focus was "we're close enough to win, we do what it takes to win". These 2 who subbed OUT were pulled because they played in a game Tuesday night, and the two that sat Tuesday night were IN the original lineup. They are told, "You're coming out JUST for this 25 minutes so X and Y can get in to help us, then everyone bats/fields in the scrimmage" which was true. We go on to tie the game. When the scrimmage begins, as I go to talk to everyone about the setup, etc., "F" tells me she's "leaving" (no prior notice of this), just has her bag/bat and headed out.
She walks away, and her father comes over (about 20 feet away, outside the dugout), in front of everyone, and blurts out, "SO IS SHE SITTING THE BENCH FRIDAY?" - "I don't know, why?" - "I NEED TO KNOW IF IT'S WORTH MY GAS MONEY TO GO FRIDAY IF SHE'S GOING TO SIT." - "I will decide on my lineup on Friday like I generally do - I'm the coach, this is my team, and I make the decisions on who plays/who doesn't." - "THIS AIN'T YOUR TEAM." - "Excuse me?" - I SAID THIS AIN'T YOUR TEAM - THESE PARENTS CONTRIBUTE A LOT TO THIS - IT AIN'T YOUR TEAM." ...and he and "F" walk off. My girls just stared at me like deer in headlights. The scrimmage was quiet after that for the most part. I later round out the father told her when the game was done and we were picking up the dugout to "Grab your ****, we're leaving".
Now with 13 girls, I'm not sure what is appropriate to do about playing time for "F" for our game on Friday. My parents/players sign "Codes of Conduct" that specifically state that playing time can be diminished/suspended for acts by the parents deemed "detrimental to the success/stability of the team" - I don't want to go that route and never have before - this is the FIRST parent issue that's come up all year, but a.) I've never been embarrassed like that before publicly, b.) "F"'s bat would do no good toward bringing us a win (we are 2-6-1, with 4 games to go), c.) She'd be one of the top 2 or 3 of girls I'd sit just based on effort/talent.
Any other coaches have situations somewhat like this? How DID and/or how WOULD you handle it? Thanks in advance if you made it all the way here - have a cookie and relax.