LOL! I don't have to deal with it, it's not really my issue and certainly won't phase my DD. As for contributing to the drama I'm not there at practice, I don't speak to the coaches and I haven't met more than 3 parents so far. But I understand your point, most parents play into it and the drama usually stems from the stands from my experience. We are the outsiders in this area, we aren't born and raised locally so we don't know everyone and don't have the last name.
High School Ball Drama
- Thread starter Jquick823
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LOL! I don't have to deal with it, it's not really my issue and certainly won't phase my DD. As for contributing to the drama I'm not there at practice, I don't speak to the coaches and I haven't met more than 3 parents so far. But I understand your point, most parents play into it and the drama usually stems from the stands from my experience. We are the outsiders in this area, we aren't born and raised locally so we don't know everyone and don't have the last name.
- Mar 9, 2015
- 321
- 18
This is what I tell my kids about life in general. Have to learn how to deal with the good and bad. There will always be drama at work, school, sports, etc. Go to practice, be a team player, lead by example, etc.
My freshman year in college, we had a "bad batch" of seniors on our team. They were pretty catty and didn't provide much direction. Since I never played as a freshman, I wasn't affected by it but one of my fellow freshmen, who started about 1/2 of the games, really bore the brunt of one particular senior who wanted to make her life miserable. Once that group graduated our team mellowed out and things were pretty good from then on. The upshot was that our freshman group all stuck together and created a strong core as we progressed through the years. When we became seniors, we remembered that old senior class and vowed to be better; so in the end it was a good experience, just painful to have to have gone through at the time. I'm 43 years old and I STILL remember how mean that one girl was.
For DD 3 her TB team is one of the places she goes to escape the middle school drama, such as mean and disruptive kids, girls selling drugs in the bathrooms, etc.
Cannonball
Ex "Expert"
- Feb 25, 2009
- 4,886
- 113
Ok, so I'm going to weigh in and give a few comments. Not everyone is going to like these comments.
First, if any team regardless of sport has a lot of drama, the chances of winning a state title are slim and none. A lot of coaches think that they can't do much about the drama. I don't know whether they can or not but I do know I address it. I once coached with a guy that was a master of chewing people out while complimenting them. I learned a lot. So, in dealing with the drama of softball before, I've called the team together and and pointed out what it takes to win. In doing that, I've been known to call out the names of a few dealing the drama and compliment them for being the teammates that are rock solid and who would never start drama. The wouldn't because they know first of all I won't stand for it but secondly, I know that they want to win conference, regional, sectional and state titles. I know that they can always be counted on to be bigger than that. I tell them how much I like them and are counting on them. I then tell the team that I expect for the rest of the team to be like them and not be ones who start or carry on drama. I would have to say that I don't think that my point has ever been missed.
First, if any team regardless of sport has a lot of drama, the chances of winning a state title are slim and none. A lot of coaches think that they can't do much about the drama. I don't know whether they can or not but I do know I address it. I once coached with a guy that was a master of chewing people out while complimenting them. I learned a lot. So, in dealing with the drama of softball before, I've called the team together and and pointed out what it takes to win. In doing that, I've been known to call out the names of a few dealing the drama and compliment them for being the teammates that are rock solid and who would never start drama. The wouldn't because they know first of all I won't stand for it but secondly, I know that they want to win conference, regional, sectional and state titles. I know that they can always be counted on to be bigger than that. I tell them how much I like them and are counting on them. I then tell the team that I expect for the rest of the team to be like them and not be ones who start or carry on drama. I would have to say that I don't think that my point has ever been missed.
There was a bit of drama on DD's team last week that involved my DD and another player. I called the coach, I know him, and asked him to handle it so that I didn't have to. Drama is now gone and they're back to playing ball.
- Feb 25, 2016
- 82
- 0
Get 25 girls in the same room and what can you expect? A little drama is unavoidable. Squash your differences and just enjoy the game. If it escalates to hair pulling or bullying over social networks, that's when you need to get to coach to say something to them or kick them off the team.
Exactly. Be suspicious of any "I overheard this" type of statements. For one, the person doing the reporting may have misunderstood. Secondly, there's always the possibility she could be making it up, or overstating it, for her own purposes. As we've seen many a time here, some people just like to stir the pot.
I'm a varsity coach dealing with some disgruntled players on the JV team because they didn't make varsity. Here is the outline of my talk with them. Sorry if it's a little long but hopefully it can help.
Why you didn't make varsity ( A players perspective )
1.The coach doesn't like me.... Be real that's a cop out work harder
2. Coach plays favorites
I have favorites but I don't favor them, I expect more of them. I favor hard workers that are committed to both self and team improvements that don't give up when they are knocked down or don't get their way.
3. It's political
I don't even know what this means and I'm sure the kid who said it doesn't either.
4. The coach picks his friends daughters.
All 8 of our coaches evaluate the players together and give input. I have the final say but not without help and assessment.
5.Coach is not fair.
I'm not fair this is competition, and competition is not fair.
Why you didn't make varsity (A coaches perspective)
1. Other players at this time are better than you. Bottom line if you were better than someone on varsity, you'd most likely be on varsity because I want that player(s) that can help us compete at the highest level and win.
2. Position and playing time
four 1st basemen or five catchers is not practical
3. You have a weakness in one or more areas
Throwing - speed and or accuracy
Fielding - speed and or accuracy
Speed - you move and think too slow
Mental toughness - can you play with pressure
Attitude --Attitude - Attitude Are you team 1st or me 1st?
Handle disappointments and setbacks
Hitting flaws - Mechanics , ability , work ethic
4. Commitment to self improvement over your 4 yrs. of high school or do you have the same weakness year after year.
5. Coachable Being coachable is not as easy today as it was when I was a kid. Today we make excuses and blame others. Make an honest assessment of yourself. Look around, if you were the coach and playing at the highest level possible is the goal, whom would you pick?
6.Your killing my dream with peer pressure and meanness. Resist human nature, but instead of working harder and being part of a softball family that challenges each other to be, act, and perform at their very best, you put down the hard workers and kill my dream of having the finest softball program at GHS.
Why you didn't make varsity ( A players perspective )
1.The coach doesn't like me.... Be real that's a cop out work harder
2. Coach plays favorites
I have favorites but I don't favor them, I expect more of them. I favor hard workers that are committed to both self and team improvements that don't give up when they are knocked down or don't get their way.
3. It's political
I don't even know what this means and I'm sure the kid who said it doesn't either.
4. The coach picks his friends daughters.
All 8 of our coaches evaluate the players together and give input. I have the final say but not without help and assessment.
5.Coach is not fair.
I'm not fair this is competition, and competition is not fair.
Why you didn't make varsity (A coaches perspective)
1. Other players at this time are better than you. Bottom line if you were better than someone on varsity, you'd most likely be on varsity because I want that player(s) that can help us compete at the highest level and win.
2. Position and playing time
four 1st basemen or five catchers is not practical
3. You have a weakness in one or more areas
Throwing - speed and or accuracy
Fielding - speed and or accuracy
Speed - you move and think too slow
Mental toughness - can you play with pressure
Attitude --Attitude - Attitude Are you team 1st or me 1st?
Handle disappointments and setbacks
Hitting flaws - Mechanics , ability , work ethic
4. Commitment to self improvement over your 4 yrs. of high school or do you have the same weakness year after year.
5. Coachable Being coachable is not as easy today as it was when I was a kid. Today we make excuses and blame others. Make an honest assessment of yourself. Look around, if you were the coach and playing at the highest level possible is the goal, whom would you pick?
6.Your killing my dream with peer pressure and meanness. Resist human nature, but instead of working harder and being part of a softball family that challenges each other to be, act, and perform at their very best, you put down the hard workers and kill my dream of having the finest softball program at GHS.
Last edited:
- Sep 28, 2015
- 109
- 0
I wish this was as cut and dry everywhere. I am beyond frustrated with my dd's varsity coach. My DD plays for a very competitive TB team, one of the strongest bats on the team, team captain, starting catcher. If not catching will play somewhere (1B or OF) Her bat is too strong to sit. She is being actively recruited
Then we go to HS ball. The coach is very involved in the local travel team (C level org at best). Had 10 returning players this year. Two seniors who haven't picked up a bat or glove since last school season ended are apparently going to be starters. Then he brings up two sophomores one may start over my daughter in the outfield. She is an outfielder. My DD played the OF last year with no errors. I told my DD to talk to him today.
My DD works about 6 days a week all year to improve herself to be passed over by kids to pick up a glove for 6 weeks a year If this isn't town politics nothing is!!!
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