JJsqueeze
Dad, Husband....legend
They let girls coach softball? From what I've seen in Rec you need a beer gut and a receding hairline to coach. I was overqualified.
feels like assistant coach is over stepping boundaries.
- Thread starter soxsfan09
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I agree with Sweet Lou's approach. Assistant coaches can be a great asset, but if you just want someone to do the "grunt work" with no input you are going to have a hard time finding and keeping assistants....
- Feb 12, 2014
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Sounds like you hit the assistant coach lottery. Someone who wants to help, learn, and be a part of the team. Seems as if she's excited to get started and you're not sure if you want to be there at all. Maybe it would be something to consider to changing roles, although I don't think that there should be much difference between a "head" coach and "assistant" coach for a Rec team.
Some of my best memories of my daughter's Rec experience are standing in the parking lot with the two other coaches talking about all sorts of situations after practice while our girls played tag. My wife never understood how we practiced for so long after dark! ;-)
When I started helping my daughter's team, I knew NOTHING about softball. The "head" coach helped me along and gave me responsibility and has become a very dear friend. Our DD's now play travel ball together.
Some of my best memories of my daughter's Rec experience are standing in the parking lot with the two other coaches talking about all sorts of situations after practice while our girls played tag. My wife never understood how we practiced for so long after dark! ;-)
When I started helping my daughter's team, I knew NOTHING about softball. The "head" coach helped me along and gave me responsibility and has become a very dear friend. Our DD's now play travel ball together.
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speaking of that, I lost two pounds of my gut last night with a line drive from my 3rd baseman.
Thank goodness she didn't shave my hair.
- Jun 18, 2013
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You have a good AC there. It sounds like you are overwhelmed by the beginning of the process and she is hitting a raw nerve.
I have gone through the last 3 seasons with what I thought were good ACs. They showed up at practices and laughed with the girls and did what I asked. They were at games and were generally helpful. We never talked outside of practice and games.
This season, I have 2 ACs that I have talked to more in 4 games time than the other 3 seasons combined. Granted, I have known one of them for > 10 years, but I had never met the other outside of seeing him coach his daughter's 8U team last year. We text regularly about games and talk strategies after practices. Our wives talk to each other and are becoming friends. I had to miss a game last week and both of my ACs called me to give me a detailed run down of who played where and how everything went. Last season when I missed anything I would here from my daughter what the score was and that was it. This has been the best season yet for me.
Talk to your AC and let her take on as much responsibility as she wants. You will have enough to deal with. Her doing more just makes it easier for you to enjoy your time.
I have gone through the last 3 seasons with what I thought were good ACs. They showed up at practices and laughed with the girls and did what I asked. They were at games and were generally helpful. We never talked outside of practice and games.
This season, I have 2 ACs that I have talked to more in 4 games time than the other 3 seasons combined. Granted, I have known one of them for > 10 years, but I had never met the other outside of seeing him coach his daughter's 8U team last year. We text regularly about games and talk strategies after practices. Our wives talk to each other and are becoming friends. I had to miss a game last week and both of my ACs called me to give me a detailed run down of who played where and how everything went. Last season when I missed anything I would here from my daughter what the score was and that was it. This has been the best season yet for me.
Talk to your AC and let her take on as much responsibility as she wants. You will have enough to deal with. Her doing more just makes it easier for you to enjoy your time.
Gosh, I ask those type of questions - just to make conversation. Coaches and I even text those sort of topics. She reached out to you and you have slapped her down. She may take her DD and run.
First off, I think it's great that you stepped up to coach a team. So many parents just don't want to put in the time.
You will learn quickly that this group has a vast wealth of knowledge and experience. They will not just agree with the poster to be nice. What they will do is give honest answers based on their knowledge.
It doesn't seem unreasonable for the AC to want to have a rule book and want to know where people are playing. Often they see something you might have missed. Just like playing requires teamwork, so does coaching. Some are amazing at time management to get through a lot of things, some are great instructors, some are good at handling parents.
Coaching these kids is a lot of fun but it's very hard. At 10U you have such a wide range of players that you need a couple AC's to really have good practices. Having one that appears to want to step up and help is a blessing not a curse.
You will learn quickly that this group has a vast wealth of knowledge and experience. They will not just agree with the poster to be nice. What they will do is give honest answers based on their knowledge.
It doesn't seem unreasonable for the AC to want to have a rule book and want to know where people are playing. Often they see something you might have missed. Just like playing requires teamwork, so does coaching. Some are amazing at time management to get through a lot of things, some are great instructors, some are good at handling parents.
Coaching these kids is a lot of fun but it's very hard. At 10U you have such a wide range of players that you need a couple AC's to really have good practices. Having one that appears to want to step up and help is a blessing not a curse.
I guess I'd be wondering why she didn't step up for the head coach job originally. Sounds like she's interested and enthused, and you said you took it because no one else wanted it. Find out if she wants to be head coach and you can either be the assistant or just watch.
If you want to be head coach then just let her know you're feeling your way along right now, and maybe ask if she has any suggestions. It's easy to say "what's the lineup?" It's not so easy to say "here's the lineup." You'll also be able to figure out if she's asking because she's interested in what the team will be doing or what her daughter will be doing.
As has been stated, one of the biggest responsibilities of being head coach is to be a communicator. You need to keep your assistants informed. But you also need to let them know how you're planning to coach the team - what are your overarching goals and plans? That might stop some of the questions.
I wouldn't be too bothered by her asking for her own rulebook either. If she's really good on the rules then you don't have to be. One less thing to worry about during the games.
If you want to be head coach then just let her know you're feeling your way along right now, and maybe ask if she has any suggestions. It's easy to say "what's the lineup?" It's not so easy to say "here's the lineup." You'll also be able to figure out if she's asking because she's interested in what the team will be doing or what her daughter will be doing.
As has been stated, one of the biggest responsibilities of being head coach is to be a communicator. You need to keep your assistants informed. But you also need to let them know how you're planning to coach the team - what are your overarching goals and plans? That might stop some of the questions.
I wouldn't be too bothered by her asking for her own rulebook either. If she's really good on the rules then you don't have to be. One less thing to worry about during the games.
Methinks the OP did not receive the "we feel you, dawg" responses hoped for.
I agree with everyone who said you are lucky to have such an enthusiastic AC. In 7 years coaching rec, I've yet to have an AC who wants to be that involved. She's not overstepping her boundaries, she's trying to learn and improve as a coach. Let her. Help her. Or get out of her way.
I agree with everyone who said you are lucky to have such an enthusiastic AC. In 7 years coaching rec, I've yet to have an AC who wants to be that involved. She's not overstepping her boundaries, she's trying to learn and improve as a coach. Let her. Help her. Or get out of her way.
- Oct 3, 2009
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I agree with most of the posters here, you have hit the assistant coach jackpot. And I would be dancing a happy dance in your shoes. Let her take on as much as she can and support her. It will make your job MUCH easier and more enjoyable. As somebody said or implied, this can be alot of fun if you have a partner(s) in crime.
