Who is the most responsible for player growth/performance?

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May 20, 2016
433
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Player, followed by player, followed by player.

If you don't have the drive, the best parenting or coaching in the world will make no difference.
 
Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
Parent is number 1. That is who puts a ball in their hand and creates the enjoyment of the game in most cases. A 4 year old has no idea how to put work in. They are playing and they need someone to play with. If it isn't fun, it's going to be hard get them to continue. Then it helps to have a coach they love at an early age. Many kids have been pushed to other sports by a bad coach. After enjoying and learning the game early, the players responsibility will gradually take the place of the coach's and then the parents. So when young, I say parent, coach and then player. Then it evolves into player, parent, and coach. Then finally to player, coach, parent. JMHO
I think this is spot on, in particular in today's day and age where kids do not play ball with their friends in the neighborhood much anymore (I was going to write almost the same exact thing) (y)

If you asked this question when my father was growing up (1940's/50's) the answer most of the time would have been the parents had very little involvement. My father played baseball and basketball in college and I don't think my grandparents could differentiate between the two sports (they were both immigrants, one from Lebanon and the other from Australia..)
 
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Nov 4, 2015
320
43
I think this is spot on, in particular in today's day and age where kids do not play ball with their friends in the neighborhood much anymore (I was going to write almost the same exact thing) (y)

If you asked this question when my father was growing up (1940's/50's) the answer most of the time would have been the parents had very little involvement. My father played baseball and basketball in college and I don't think my grandparents could differentiate between the two sports (they were both immigrants, one from Lebanon and the other from Australia..)

I played a million hours of wiffle ball, football, and basketball growing up with friends. But without starting out with my dad, I probably would have done nearly as much. My dad always talked about playing ball with his dad. Dad didn't spend nearly as much time with me as I have with my daughter, but again, I played way more on my own with friends than my DD does.
 
Apr 20, 2018
4,581
113
SoCal
There a different coaches for different things. Team coach: Manages the team, conducts practices, game time decisions, etc. At the lower ages, the coach is looked upon as the person showing them the "how to's" of softball. How to field, how to hit, where to throw the ball, when to steal,etc. Teaching them the game. As they get older the coach should be working on the nuances of the game, situational defenses, bunting situations, 1st/3rd, strategy. Ways to win a game.

Hired coach: Pitching, hitting, catching, fielding, Conditioning coaches. These people you pay to refine certain aspects of the game. This is where DD's get better and then bring their skills to the practice field to demonstrate what she has learned.

I never paid for a lesson until it was obvious my DD (8th grade)needed next level catching/hitting lessons since all of sudden I had no idea what I was talking about for the past 6 years. At some point mom/dad will have taught their kid all they know and needs someone else to take them to the next level. For much of what the coach was teaching, has already been taught by myself. She is just being told by someone in an "authoritative" position that she will listen to.

When we hit the cages(very rare), I am primarily the ball feeder with some comments to refine (stay back, wait for it, focus on hitting oppo, etc). Teaching for me is over for the most part.
This is an often overlooked piece of the puzzle. And it is very important to choose wisely. I am my DD hitting and fielding coach mainly because there are too many bad coaches out there teaching old school garbage. I was at the park a couple days ago with DD and there is a kid taking a hitting lesson and dad was shagging balls. Said hi and small talk and found out his son was going into HS and was going to try to make the team. I could see from the distance the kid hitting off the tee was not even in a good athletic stance and his swing was not very powerful or good. (bat drag) So I continue around to the backstop and listen in a little. And I hear the paid coach demonstrate and say, "So your front foot reaches out like you are stepping on thin ice and your back foot turns like you were squishing a bug."
So this father is paying somebody that is practically giving the kid zero chance of making his HS team. Parent must educate themselves to a certain degree to avoid this from happening. If you see a player on your team or even the other team whose DD goes 4 for 4 with 3 extra base hits, don't be shy, go ask them who is their DD hitting coach.
 
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Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
I played a million hours of wiffle ball, football, and basketball growing up with friends. But without starting out with my dad, I probably would have done nearly as much. My dad always talked about playing ball with his dad. Dad didn't spend nearly as much time with me as I have with my daughter, but again, I played way more on my own with friends than my DD does.
My father had no help from his parents as I stated..he was also 1 of of 11 children. My Dad worked with me a bunch but I played a lot with my friends as well. My DD (and her brothers) gets all of her "non-organized" ball activity with me. Just the way society has evolved over the years.
 
Apr 20, 2018
4,581
113
SoCal
I played a million hours of wiffle ball, football, and basketball growing up with friends. But without starting out with my dad, I probably would have done nearly as much. My dad always talked about playing ball with his dad. Dad didn't spend nearly as much time with me as I have with my daughter, but again, I played way more on my own with friends than my DD does.

When I (and probably you) grew up we had 40 or 50 kids between the ages of 5 and 15 within one block. Pick up baseball basketball, football games at the park were every day. Playdate?? What the hell is that? You knocked on your neighbor's door and said, Good morning Mrs. Jones, can Tony and Andrew come out and play, we are going to the park to play baseball. Even though there were 3 dirt infields with backstops at our park at the end of the street, we always played on the grass with the fenced corner of the park and used our bikes as backstops so we could have a homerun fence. And there was no such thing as a hitting or pitching coach. And we didn't even have u-tube either.
 
Apr 28, 2014
2,316
113
Depends on the age

8-10 Coach/Parent/player
11-14 Parent/Player/Coach
15-on Player/Coach/Parent
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
Depends on the age

8-10 Coach/Parent/player
11-14 Parent/Player/Coach
15-on Player/Coach/Parent
Kinda surprised at your youngest age response....
Simply because can see in your other bountiful wonderful posts how paying attention by the parent to not let kid get effected by junk ....might have played a greater role in your choice on this.

Thought you may have replied parent first because you wouldnt want to just let anyone be the greater influence than you the parent of a young child.

Younger the child can be greater influenced by another parent???
 
Nov 4, 2015
320
43
When I (and probably you) grew up we had 40 or 50 kids between the ages of 5 and 15 within one block. Pick up baseball basketball, football games at the park were every day. Playdate?? What the hell is that? You knocked on your neighbor's door and said, Good morning Mrs. Jones, can Tony and Andrew come out and play, we are going to the park to play baseball. Even though there were 3 dirt infields with backstops at our park at the end of the street, we always played on the grass with the fenced corner of the park and used our bikes as backstops so we could have a homerun fence. And there was no such thing as a hitting or pitching coach. And we didn't even have u-tube either.

Didn't grow up in a neighborhood, but was lucky to grow up when you could jump on a 3-wheeler (death trap) and round up 3-4 guys to play. We went through so many wiffle balls and nerf footballs it wasn't even funny. Had to hunt the baseballs because they were harder to come by. The first row of bushes or the ditch of the dirt road would be our home run fence. Great times!
 

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