When The Org “Hissy Quits”!

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Aug 19, 2015
1,089
113
Atlanta, GA
The team that my DD was on in 2019-2020 had all 21s and 22s on it. The HC and AC coach's DDs were both 21s. Although both excellent players (who never sat the bench ever), both decided they wanted to go to big SEC schools and not play softball. But the team forged on to play again this spring/summer. They played in March and April but in May, the team got an email (not a call, not an in-person meeting) that they were folding. Because the coaches' daughters wanted more time with their friends before going off to college. Never mind the rest of the girls who are committed and especially the 22s still trying to get recruited. What a complete D*&K move. We were so glad that our DD was no longer on the team. Talk about lack of loyalty to your players.
 
Aug 18, 2018
80
18
Ok. So let me get this straight. Team folds. Seniors are all done and they don't owe final payment. Non seniors not moving to a team in the org are still paying that last payment since it was a deposit.

That's BS, if a team folded like that I would not stay in org and want that deposit back.

Travel is an agreed contract, DD okays for you for this time period and we pay X. If we leave I get it and we forfeit that money. But if team fails to meet their commitment and folds then that money should be paid back since there's no services being provided for that amount paid in.



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Dec 11, 2010
3,649
113
@RADcatcher I've already said way too much about this.

In review:

The email came out while the team was still having a post game meeting. Email was sent by this ultra reasonable org head. Pretty funny, really. Could it have been handled better? Gee, maybe, lol

The team coach apparently didn’t know the ultra reasonable org head was going to do this. Yeah, a slight mis-step there, lol

The ultra reasonable org head had previously got in a beef with the coach of another team, (on field and during a game), causing his best coach to hissy quit.

Ultra reasonable org head disbanded DD’s mixed age team to back fill the players on the other team (16u) that went with the coach when the coach of the 16u team hissy quit.

But yeah, it’s because players aren’t loyal to the team. Or maybe it’s because the ultra reasonable org head needed an excuse to disband this team….

Like I said before, it’s over, I can mostly laugh about it now. It’s something that happened last year. A year is a really long time!

That being said, your assessment (guess) is a bit of a miss. If you want to make a point about player commitment or people scheduling lessons and not paying for them, this really isn’t what happened here. The org head hissy quit. Just like it says in the title.

Also, it didn’t seem like you understood my post about Venmo. My point was that if you use Venmo, and someone doesn’t show up, you can have them pay. Or better yet, in order to schedule a lesson, they have to pay at time of scheduling…. I know people bring the cash when they show up. It’s the other times that are a problem. No-shows are a problem, I think this is a good way to deal with it. I would tell them up front that you will be ruthless about this. Then be ruthless!

ETA: and for the second time, I want to make it clear that dd showed up to all the games and practices. I want to say again that if there were players not showing up, I wasn’t aware of it. Usually that is pretty obvious…..
 
Last edited:
May 29, 2015
2,375
113
I agree with both @RADcatcher and @Westwind ...

Overall there is a lack of commitment and communication in the softball world. Too many people want to have the benefits of running a business AND having built in friends and family with none of the responsibility of either. It will always go wrong.

I cringe when any business or employer says “We are family here.” No, no you are not. You are a business. Too many people, including the people running them, forget that’s what these teams are, — until the person running it gets tires of it, then they remember all of the sudden.

I cannot emphasize it enough ... contracts, contracts, contracts. Exit plan, exit plan, exit plan. Succession planning, succession planning, succession planning. If you created a team or an org, you are a business. You should know what happens next for your business after you get hit by a bus or hissy quit.

For specialty coaches, like @RADcatcher ... contracts and business plans! Let me know if you need help.
 
Dec 11, 2010
3,649
113
@The Man In Blue

Thats a really good post.

One of my DD’s was on a team that professed to be family, and it was a pita. A player joins a softball team to play softball. The family wasn’t looking for friends, they were looking for their kid to practice play ball.

I have made some lifelong friends of parents of my DD’s team mates. But it wasn’t because I endured team dinners and “team building” events.

Setting boundaries in writing is absolutely excellent. It looks professional and it can serve as a guide to “how to act” for those who truly don’t know how or what to do.
 

RADcatcher

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
4,094
113
California
I agree with both @RADcatcher and @Westwind ...

Overall there is a lack of commitment and communication in the softball world. Too many people want to have the benefits of running a business AND having built in friends and family with none of the responsibility of either. It will always go wrong.

I cringe when any business or employer says “We are family here.” No, no you are not. You are a business. Too many people, including the people running them, forget that’s what these teams are, — until the person running it gets tires of it, then they remember all of the sudden.

I cannot emphasize it enough ... contracts, contracts, contracts. Exit plan, exit plan, exit plan. Succession planning, succession planning, succession planning. If you created a team or an org, you are a business. You should know what happens next for your business after you get hit by a bus or hissy quit.

For specialty coaches, like @RADcatcher ... contracts and business plans! Let me know if you need help.
Appreciate the helpful suggestions @TheManInBlue and @Westwind.
Simply the standards/business guidelines had to be adjusted to meet the changing times.
Which those on the schedule were fine with the adjustment.
 
Last edited:
Feb 15, 2017
436
43
It's insane what we (parents) have put up with and gone through because of jackass, egomaniacal coaches and org heads. That comment is not restricted to any particular level of ball and the stories and BS is across the board...sure there are douchebag parents, players, umps and tourney directors as well. Just a little slice of life I guess. It's almost too painful to re-tell some of the stories.
One thing the head of the org that my daughter used to play for said the team belongs to the parents and the players and without them there would be no need for the coach or the organization

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Feb 1, 2021
228
43
That email reminded me of the time I had a major tourney orgs TD juuuuust about hissy quit.

DDs team won a National Championship tourney on a tiebreaker due to serious storms that damaged the fields just before the final game. TD said it would take 10 days to determine the winner and said it would probably be shared with the other team. I sent an email to the national orgs leadership asking why a tourney with clear tiebreaker rules would take 10 days to determine and ultimately be shared? Maybe I was out of line, but it was an honest question and it was our team's final game together before we broke up. I just wanted to leave happy and they did have VERY clear tiebreaker rules to determine the winner.

Before you ask why I sent it to the National Office and not him directly, the dude is a freaking hothead like you've never seen. He treats parents like dog crap and still does to this day. Oh, AND the coach of the other team in the championship was also a TD for the same org. He would have basically just responded with the same email and it would have gone nowhere.

The issue however was resolved in a few hours, yes, because of my email. Apparently the national office sent the TD my email and he sent me an UNBELIEVABLE response! He basically called me every bad word you can think of and blamed me for why umpires don't want to umpire games anymore. LOL, I have no idea why that was even put in the email. I don't yell at umps, ever. I had never even met the guy. It was just a filthy nasty brain dump of a man with no good anywhere in his soul.

I have kept it in my email for the past 4 years for the right time to post. Maybe it's time. He threatened to assault me and said he was going to throw the trophies in a ditch and would tell me where to go get them. I don't give a rats rear about my DDs trophies but it was some really off-the-wall, bi-polar BS.
 
Apr 26, 2019
180
43
That email reminded me of the time I had a major tourney orgs TD juuuuust about hissy quit.

DDs team won a National Championship tourney on a tiebreaker due to serious storms that damaged the fields just before the final game. TD said it would take 10 days to determine the winner and said it would probably be shared with the other team. I sent an email to the national orgs leadership asking why a tourney with clear tiebreaker rules would take 10 days to determine and ultimately be shared? Maybe I was out of line, but it was an honest question and it was our team's final game together before we broke up. I just wanted to leave happy and they did have VERY clear tiebreaker rules to determine the winner.

Before you ask why I sent it to the National Office and not him directly, the dude is a freaking hothead like you've never seen. He treats parents like dog crap and still does to this day. Oh, AND the coach of the other team in the championship was also a TD for the same org. He would have basically just responded with the same email and it would have gone nowhere.

The issue however was resolved in a few hours, yes, because of my email. Apparently the national office sent the TD my email and he sent me an UNBELIEVABLE response! He basically called me every bad word you can think of and blamed me for why umpires don't want to umpire games anymore. LOL, I have no idea why that was even put in the email. I don't yell at umps, ever. I had never even met the guy. It was just a filthy nasty brain dump of a man with no good anywhere in his soul.

I have kept it in my email for the past 4 years for the right time to post. Maybe it's time. He threatened to assault me and said he was going to throw the trophies in a ditch and would tell me where to go get them. I don't give a rats rear about my DDs trophies but it was some really off-the-wall, bi-polar BS.
So, where are the trophies? Maybe you can channel the coach and do an expletive laden poem with clues to find them? We could have our own version of Discuss Fastpitch's Forrest Fenn's treasure.
 

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