What is the goal to all of this?

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Dec 2, 2013
3,410
113
Texas
What is the goal of all of this? Your goals will change year to year and season to season depending on the age. You can have a pie in the sky dream of playing in college, but your goals will need to be reassessed continually. The biggest goal is does my DD want to play again this upcoming season? Yes (goal accomplished). Did my DD get better? Yes (goal accomplished) No (keep working, seek out outside help). Did DD make the All Star team? As she gets older. Do you want to make the Hittin' Kitten' local TB team? Is she getting better? Does she just want to play for the HS team? This will happen to most of the kids along the way as their goals change from REC, All stars, TB then quitting. My DD is 1 of 3 girls that will be playing in college out her entire 2019 class from her Rec league. There are others that could have gone on to play but decided that being a NARP (non athletic regular people) was their path.

There is a kid that was my last pick on my 10U All star team. She did not do very well at all that summer. She actually stopped playing for a bit and only played for her private school, but I kept in touch with the family and coaxed back to playing. She got better! Fast Forward to her Senior Year. She led the district with 14 HR's! She will be going to a great D3 school in Texas. Her goals changed year to year and they adjusted.

I agree with some of the posters above. You can spend so much money on TB over the course of time that would have paid for 4 years of college, but the time is well spent with family and good friends. Some of these National 14U teams that have potential D1 talent that travel every weekend out of state. Think about those costs? If that's your goal, and you can make it work and you are okay with getting a 50% scholarship at an out of state school, then that's your goal. Keep it all in perspective and don't get caught up in the hyperbole. Parents will say the weirdest things to justify their decisions.

Has anyone seen the college transfer portal???? Wow! Sounds like lots of goals have changed for those players/families!
 
Jul 16, 2013
4,659
113
Pennsylvania
😂 I laugh because I’m a strong advocate for female athletics. Many times I’ve gone to bat for female sports teams at my kids’ school. And what makes you assume I’m a dad? I don’t believe I ever mentioned my gender in any post. I apologize if I gave that impression. I’ll take no offense to being called a dad. I’m a 5’7” bucket mom who didn’t play on a hoops travel team. And I grew 8 inches over one summer. Yep. I was a tiny tot. Did my 5’5” sister, also a hoops scholar, play travel ball? Nope. Both of us full scholarship athletes: part academic/part athletic. Me two year. Her four year. 20+ years ago, of course. My DD never took to basketball. That’s why I’m here on this forum. Because she does like softball. Will she be a college star? Nope. She doesn’t have the dedication for that level. And that’s ok. I’m here to ask questions and learn from more experienced people who know about softball skills.

Honestly, I don’t care if my kids play beyond HS. That was my dream as a player. I’m leaving that choice to them. I’ve told them of the hard work it takes, and that, in reality, full athletic scholarships don’t exist these days, but only for a very select few who are among the top in the nation and who probably can’t hack it academically. Those athletes are only sought after for their athleticism in whatever sport.
I know if my kids get scholarships in anything, it will be something other than sports. My shameless brags: my two youngest read and comprehend on a high school level. They won’t even be double digits for a few more years. My 14 YO: selected to represent her state at a prestigious leadership program. 1 of 60 students worldwide. All three test off the charts. Nerds? Yep. Athletic? Some more than others. I’m not really concerned about their potential college careers in athletics. That’s a bonus, if that were to happen.

I started this thread because I was pondering about the lengths parents will go to to make their kid a star and why they do it. A little 5 year old on a tee ball team who plays 30-40 games
a summer, or a parent who has an 8 year old daughter “who is looking to pick up—has a rocket arm at 3B and a big stick,” seems a bit extreme to me. I mean, really. Is the 8 YO looking to pick up or is mom or dad looking to pick up? Was the 8 year old also offered the chance to go to the zoo and eat popsicles? Or go to a swimming party? I’m sure there are a few prodigies, very few, who want to play ball, but my guess is they would rather go to the zoo. At 7/8 I was riding my bike all summer, swimming, and maybe playing 10 tee ball games for the rural league. My parents weren’t looking for me to “pick up.” And believe me, I was athletic enough to do such a things. Have I bought the $200 glove? Yep. Have I built an indoor, full length batting cage? Yep. Will it make my kid a star? Nope. We have spent some money on equipment. No doubt. Mainly because we don’t have access to facilities in our area and we don’t want to travel two hours to practice. We can afford to do it that way, thankfully. We tried TB with the 14YO. She hated it, and she was good enough to play. Hated the time away from home, hated the nasty parents, hated everything about it. Nearly everyone, including players, I’ve ever heard speak about TB, hate it for several reasons. Two common ones: money and time. I know a family who is strapped for cash, owe money to banks, yet they continue to pour their resources into TB for their DD. She is fairly athletic and might be able to go to a JUCO or small four year. They’ve spent $$$$. More money than she will get in scholarships, I would bet. It just doesn’t make any sense to me to do that- to sacrifice the family finances, sanity, quality time- for a slim chance at a slim scholarship. Getting upside down financially or having a stressed out household doesn’t seem worth it. I’m just guessing there are more families of that nature, than there are who can afford it and do it only because their kid loves it-they love traveling, being away from friends, late nights, etc.

FYI. I have found this thread quite interesting and don't want to get in the way. But I have to admit that I thought you were a dad as well. My apologies. Your screen name of "Ken2" is why I assumed you were male. Perhaps others made the same mistake. Carry on...
 
Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
Yep. Totally agree with you. I was a different cat. I’m just wondering why the model has changed? Why such a push now? The number of athletes on any given team 40 years ago, is the same number as today: 9 BB/SB on a field, 11 on the gridiron, 5 on the court, etc. Why such this fierce competitiveness, when the scholarship numbers are the same? The credence given to female sports has remained substandard in my opinion. It’s better, but still not on par.

Public education in many parts of the country is abysmal. So why aren’t parents investing $$$ in good private schools for their kids to get a leg up in academics, where there is much more scholarship money, versus investing in TB/elite teams/prospect camps, etc when the scholarship money for female athletes is much less and much harder to obtain?
Why the model changed is a good question. I am sure there are people on here who have been around long enough to have some insight into that. I am guessing at some point somebody decided that if they wanted to seek the best competition for their kids they would have go outside of their local area. Once that happened the floodgates probably opened. All I know is that horse has left the barn..

Again the competitive aspect of it really hasn't changed from the perspective of people seeking the best competition possible..that has always been the case for many athletes/parents..again that is a personal thing. The thing that has changed is that now things are less local..seeking the best competition means playing teams from surrounding states and all over the country. At the end of the day the kids do benefit from a competitive standpoint from this but it comes with a steep price tag. For the moment, for my family, it is worth it. Come talk to me when my 1 year and 4 year old sons are old enough and I may have 3 in TB at the same time(it wouldn't be for more than a year or two since my DD is 9)..you might have to find me living in a cardboard box on the side of the road but I would be willing to revisit the topic if necessary :LOL:
 
Last edited:
Feb 10, 2018
496
93
NoVA
Interesting conversation. As with others, travel sports was not something I'd ever heard of growing up (early to mid-80s). In fact, I can't remember any girls I knew playing softball or even it being out there as an option. My DD got into travel ball 3 years ago now (started with a second year 10U team), basically by accident. Had no idea what we were doing or getting into. The team was associated with our local LL, which my DD was enjoying and doing well in, and she had several friends from school already on the travel team. We tried out and were offered a spot. Probably were the 11th or 12th of 12 at the time and have slowly clawed our way up, becoming a key member of the team. I do sometimes step back and wonder why we are doing all this, and we are really only playing locally and regionally. The costs are relatively low for travel ball, but the time commitments are still very high. We've stuck with it because she loves playing the game, loves being with her friends, having "adventures" staying in different places and the occasional hotel, etc. It has also meant my DD and I spending a tremendous amount of time together.

I have no illusions about her playing at a D1 P5 school. But I've never really understood why that seems to be the goal for so many, as if achieving anything less than that represents a failed softball "career" and failed athlete. Athletes at that level are simply made of different stuff--and probably 99.8% of people are not made of that stuff no matter how much TB you play or how many private lessons you get. As I've heard before, there is a level out there for everyone. Our goal is to prepare my daughter as best we can to make and contribute on her competitive HS team. If she wants to play beyond HS at any level in college, that will be up to her.

As for why the model has changed so completely over the last generation or so: I am sure there are a variety of reasons, but one of them certainly has to be the business of travel sports. It is a multi-billion dollar a year industry in the US and, given that, there are incentives to keep the money rolling in. It may not be the parent volunteer coaches, but there are people making their living off of travel sports. Worth a read:

 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,133
113
Dallas, Texas
Honestly, I don’t care if my kids play beyond HS. That was my dream as a player. I’m leaving that choice to them. I’ve told them of the hard work it takes, and that, in reality, full athletic scholarships don’t exist these days, but only for a very select few who are among the top in the nation and who probably can’t hack it academically.

Congratulations. I have a pretty thick skin, but you succeeded in insulting me.

My DD#1 did get a full ride. She could and did "hack it academically". She has two Masters Degrees, and is a frequent speaker in her area of expertise.

I started this thread because I was pondering about the lengths parents will go to to make their kid a star and why they do it.

Geez...you don't get this. Parents can't make their child a star. The only person who can make the child a star is the child.

My kids loved playing travel ball. They are in their 30s now, and I asked them about whether they felt "cheated" out of their childhood. They both howled with laughter. They said, "Dad, we got to play with our friends all day, every weekend growing up. We loved it."

Nearly everyone, including players, I’ve ever heard speak about TB, hate it for several reasons.

You need to improve your survey techniques. I coached TB for many, many years. I helped start what is now the largest TB organization in Illinois. The kids love travel softball.

I’m just guessing there are more families of that nature, than there are who can afford it and do it only because their kid loves it-they love traveling, being away from friends, late nights, etc.

Parents shouldn't do what their kids like? Its their money and their time. You are under no obligation to do what someone else does.

All I'm doing is telling you the truth: You can build the equivalent of Jerry's World in your backyard and hire Lisa Fernandez as her personal coach. If your kid doesn't compete regularly against TB players, she will not be as good as the TB players.

Is is worth putting the time and money into TB? Depends on the kid and the parents.
 
Last edited:
Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
As for why the model has changed so completely over the last generation or so: I am sure there are a variety of reasons, but one of them certainly has to be the business of travel sports. It is a multi-billion dollar a year industry in the US and, given that, there are incentives to keep the money rolling in. It may not be the parent volunteer coaches, but there are people making their living off of travel sports. Worth a read:

This is why it isn't going away. I guess the question I have is what started it? Like I said it probably just started with a few teams wanting to play better competition and realizing they would have to move on from their own little corner of the world to do so. When I was growing up in the late 80's, early 90's, the only way you traveled is if you won. You would make an all star (or Legion) team and then you would play postseason tournaments and if you continued to win them you would play further and further away, sort of like how Little League baseball is. It was a huge deal to a kid from MA when our Pony league all star team was able to win enough to go play in Ohio.
 
Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
Great article, and sad to read that it seems parents and wealthy investors are just exploiting kids and family finances, for the most part. Joey Baseball is unique. Most of the kids playing are not like that. He would probably be great without some of the opportunities provided to him like private coaches. He sounds like a baseball prodigy.
I've seen that kid..there are probably 50 kids his age in El Toro right now who will end up being better MI then him..His father is a model for everything that is wrong with youth sports.
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,133
113
Dallas, Texas
This is why it isn't going away. I guess the question I have is what started it?

My DD started playing TB in 1993.

The reason for the traveling is that fastpitch softball teams were few and far between until 1996 or so. The SEC and the Big 10 didn't have softball until 1997. The southern states didn't have fastpitch as a high school sport until 2000. Pony League and Little League didn't have fastpitch until around 2000. Whole states didn't have fastpitch teams...Florida didn't have a fastpitch team until 1996.

Simply to find a team to play required most teams to travel to a weekend tournament somewhere.
 
Jul 16, 2013
4,659
113
Pennsylvania
My DD didn't start playing travel ball until she was 12 years old. She had attended some tryouts and offered spots prior to that, but we always decided against it because of the time commitment (when I say "we" I am including DD as part of that decision). Her goal when she was 11 was to play high school softball. She had no thoughts about college softball at that time. Her rec league ended at 12u, and her school did not have a junior high program at that time. So she had her choice of either joining a travel team when rec was over, or not play softball at all until she arrived at high school. When she was playing rec ball at 11, she was invited to try out for the little league all star team. She was chosen and started practice. All of a sudden she was on a team with other 11 year old girls that had the same level of love and commitment to the sport. Whereas her rec team was filled with, well, "rec" players. She always wanted to work more and play more, while most of her teammates were more interested in other things (and there is nothing wrong with that). When she finally got a taste of practicing/playing with other girls that had that same level of commitment, she was hooked. Before she even played the first all star game, she was asking me to research tryouts for area travel ball teams. Once that decision was made, she never looked back. As she continued to grow, her interests gradually changed as well. She developed an interest in playing in college and started thinking about potential majors. Ultimately she decided that her ultimate goal was to become a Doctor in Physical Therapy, and she chose schools that offered guaranteed programs, allowing her to complete the entire 7 year program at one school. She also wanted to play softball, but that was her secondary goal. After numerous college visits, camps, and coach meetings, she finally decided to choose a school that met all of her goals. She was offered the guaranteed seat into the doctorate program. She plays for the softball team. She loves the campus. And she received some pretty good academic scholarships. It's a D3 school so there is no athletic money. In all, the situation has worked out pretty well for her. She is extremely happy with how things have worked out and claims that she wouldn't change a thing.

From my perspective, I also enjoyed the ride. I was a coach throughout much of her career. I had the opportunity to spend a great deal of time with her and watch her grow, both as an athlete and an individual. I'm sure I could have done a lot of that through family vacations as well. But there are things that I was able to see through the lens of competition, that I think I would have missed otherwise. There are moments that I will remember and treasure forever. Times when she was faced with adversity, and fought her way through it to be successful (win or lose). I am definitely pro-travel because of the experiences my family has had. It may not be the same for everyone. Ultimately you need to determine the best path for you and your DD. Hopefully your choice is as fulfilling as mine has been. Best of luck!
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,133
113
Dallas, Texas
Colleges at the highest level, and I could be mistaken, don’t give 100% athletic only scholarships. In other words, if tuition, room/board, and books cost $100,000 for four years(Duke, Vandy, etc), they don’t give an athletic scholarship for $100,000.

In softball, the pitchers usually get a full ride (books, tuition, room and board). The catchers often get a full ride. The position players rarely get a full ride.

My DD#1 got a full athletic ride for 3 years, and a 50% athletic ride for a year. She got another 50% non-athletic ride for a fifth year....I have no idea where that money came from. All I know is that it had something to do with videotaping soccer games.

Usually, players get a mix of athletic scholarships and academic/"leadership" money.
 

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