Trying out for a new team

[Littlewoofy]

My daughter is my first child to play on a competitive travel sports team so I'm new to this and looking for guidance She is currently on a 10U team moving up to 12U in 20-21. She has been offered her spot for the upcoming season on her current team before tryouts. Her team hasn't been doing well and the development hasn't been there. My daughter is looking to tryout for 1-2 other teams which are more competitve to see if she likes the coaches and they are a better fit for her. What is the ediquette on how to deal with the current team? Unfortunately all tryouts are the same 3 days, I'm trying to create options for her and let her see other coaches but don't necessarily want to lose her spot on the current team in case we don't find a match or she doesn't make the team of her choice. Tryouts for the new teams are Monday and Tuesday. Current team is Tuesday Wednesday. Do we go to the new teams Monday and Tuesday and tell the current coach we can only make Wednesday. Let her know ahead if she makes a new team? Or be completely upfront ahead of time. Again I'm trying not to burn bridges and explore other opportunities. Sorry for the long post and thanks in advance.

 

[Blueriverdrivers]

We went through this same thing a month ago. You have to do what you think is best for your daughter. Sure some people might be upset at first but they will understand if you are going to a better more competitive situation. Hell in the end they will be happy for you. Too many parents are just looking to get that window sticker to put in their rear window to say they are on the team. A lot of girls want to be competitive and win.
I would definitely go to the other tryouts. You don’t want to miss out on a good opportunity. If you go and it’s not for you or your daughter then you go back to your other team. If it is what you are looking for then go for it. Don’t worry about hurting coaches feelings or other parents.

 

[OmniscientFan]

And if your daughter gets an offer from multiple teams, you'll have a decision to make. I had my 10U daughter try out for five different teams over the last two weeks. She is no superstar by any stretch, but she got offers from three 10U's and two 12U's. They often give a 24-hour or 48-hour window for you to accept or decline. I did several of these types of responses for both of my daughters this year, so as to not burn any bridges. (They were free agents, so to speak, as we were not going back to their organization from this year due to lack of refund and general mismanagement issues.) Three of the coaches responded in a nice manner, while two didn't respond at all. Oh, well.

Template:

Hi Coach ________,

We regretfully inform the organization that __(daughter's name)__ is declining the offer to play on the __(team name)__ 10U travel team for the 2021 season. It was a well-organized tryout and we greatly appreciate the efforts of the coaching staff, but we are looking in another direction for __(daughter's name)__ in softball next season. Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Your Name

 

[Littlewoofy]

Thank you for the responses. I agree with all of the replies.

I think part of the problem is my daughter is more competitve than most of the team. She wants to be a great player personally, plus win games. She's young, but has dreams of playing college ball. As a parent I need to put her in the best position to do that regardless of organization. Most of the girls on her current team are there to have fun with their friends, win or lose.

 

[tamss13]

After Monday''s workout you will know. You will have a feel for the players and the coaches of the new team after one practice and your direction will be clearer for you and your DD.

 

[Littlewoofy]

@tamss13 - I agree 100%. She wants to see what's out there so that's what we're doing. I told her if she makes a team but she's not feeling it, we say no thanks and go home.

It stressful, hard to wait until Monday . But I know it will be perfectly clear

 

[radness]

And if your daughter gets an offer from multiple teams, you'll have a decision to make. I had my 10U daughter try out for five different teams over the last two weeks. She is no superstar by any stretch, but she got offers from three 10U's and two 12U's. They often give a 24-hour or 48-hour window for you to accept or decline. I did several of these types of responses for both of my daughters this year, so as to not burn any bridges. (They were free agents, so to speak, as we were not going back to their organization from this year due to lack of refund and general mismanagement issues.) Three of the coaches responded in a nice manner, while two didn't respond at all. Oh, well.

Template:

Hi Coach ________,

We regretfully inform the organization that __(daughter's name)__ is declining the offer to play on the __(team name)__ 10U travel team for the 2021 season. It was a well-organized tryout and we greatly appreciate the efforts of the coaching staff, but we are looking in another direction for __(daughter's name)__ in softball next season. Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Your Name

Nice post!
Like the template!
*Noted that 2 of 5 coaches did not respond at all.

Seems a fairly consistent average on attention to
( imo )
an important detail.
Communication!

Good for you OmniscientFan for a courtious no thank you !

 

[Chris8]

Nice post!
Like the template!
*Noted that 2 of 5 coaches did not respond at all.

Seems a fairly consistent average on attention to
( imo )
an important detail.
Communication!

Good for you OmniscientFan for a courtious no thank you !

As a coach and a parent. This drives me nuts. I always respond to players/parents. It's just courtesy and respectful....granted not always easy.

As a parent our 16U daughter has been leading her efforts not her parents. She's directly communicated with orgs and coaches. "2/5 did not respond at all"....seems about right in her experience. Her comment was...."I'm a 15 yo girl and the coach/adult who's in their 40's/50's/60's can't even respond to me.....that sure says a lot about them...." Wise observation from a 15yo. The team she selected did communicate well and she made connections with the coaches at the tryouts. It wasn't the reason for selecting this club, the level of play and opportunities had to be right too...but the good communication was an indicator that other facets of the team would be handled well.

to OP @Littlewoofy will you please come back and update us on what happened. "the rest of the story". Specifically I'm curious what you did with her current team, advising them that you were going to other tryouts...and how they handled the situation.

 

[Littlewoofy]

Thank you all for the advice!

@Chris8 - I'll definitely post back later next week and let everyone know how it went

 

[Shiloh]

3 days, 3 tryouts. You should be able to make this work. Just let the coaches know up front that DD will only be able to attend for one day.

Vet the coaches as much as you can. What is their style? Carrots or sticks? Which of these works for your DD? How much practice time? What do they work on as a team vs what should they be expected to work on individually? How many players on the roster?

Ask where the team needs the most help. Does this match your DD’s skills/desires?

Ask where they might see your DD fitting in (position, rank i.e. #1 pitcher, #2 SS etc) and in the batting order.

Great coaches will develop players but sometimes only if they see potential. So ask about DD’s potential.

And don’t just go for a brand name esp at 12U. Playing time is what matters most. College is a long way off.

One step at a time.

Best of luck!