Sex Offender Spectator

[Easton33]

I was just hit with this yesterday and I want some feedback.
One of my best players has a brother in jail for rape. Players mom last night was telling me in casual conversation that he is getting out soon. She started describing him and his tattoos and said "oh you will see them at the games". Immediately my antenna went up but I didn't say anything. I know this will be a sticky situation but the overall well being and health of my players come first. (Also have several little brothers and sisters running around). I think, I even though I may not like it, it may be alright for him to go to the local softball complex and watch. There are probably several there that no one knows about. We travel some though, and I know I don't want him with us for hotel stays. I know that the conversation to keep him away will blow up and I may lose a player but I think I have to do it. Anyone ran into this before? What are your thoughts and what would you think if you had a dd on the team?

 

[ConorMacleod]

My first question would be what are the parameters of his parole? As a RSO (registered sex offender) is he even allowed to be there under the terms of his parole?

Very sticky situation if it isn't against his parole. But if you're that uncomfortable, you pretty much have to address this with the parents. And certainly the other parents have a right to be informed.

 

[WARRIORMIKE]

If he's registered as a sex offender then he can't be Around the girls. If not then they need to know boundaries

 

[Easton33]

My first question would be what are the parameters of his parole? As a RSO (registered sex offender) is he even allowed to be there under the terms of his parole?

Very sticky situation if it isn't against his parole. But if you're that uncomfortable, you pretty much have to address this with the parents. And certainly the other parents have a right to be informed.

Thanks Connor, I just assumed he would be allowed since she brought it up. Any idea where and how I can find the terms of his parole?

 

[PEPPERS]

I was just hit with this yesterday and I want some feedback.
One of my best players has a brother in jail for rape. Players mom last night was telling me in casual conversation that he is getting out soon. She started describing him and his tattoos and said "oh you will see them at the games". Immediately my antenna went up but I didn't say anything. I know this will be a sticky situation but the overall well being and health of my players come first. (Also have several little brothers and sisters running around). I think, I even though I may not like it, it may be alright for him to go to the local softball complex and watch. There are probably several there that no one knows about. We travel some though, and I know I don't want him with us for hotel stays. I know that the conversation to keep him away will blow up and I may lose a player but I think I have to do it. Anyone ran into this before? What are your thoughts and what would you think if you had a dd on the team?

Contact your local law enforcement, each state has different guidelines so depending on the charge and guidelines he may not be allowed to attend the games. That would solve your problem.

Your park or rec league may have rules about offenders attending also, check the rules of the park or rec.

 

[JJsqueeze]

I think the shark you see is less dangerous than the shark you don't. I guarantee that your team has been around plenty of dangerous sex offenders at games. Many friendlies in SoCal look like they are sponsored by prisons if you were to judge by the spectators.

I think the real thing to guard against is the tumult this can cause within the team. I would respectfully talk to the mom and let her know that while his debt will have been paid, being convicted of rape is something that he will have to live with forever and one of the things that is perfectly natural is for people to not want the guy convicted of rape hanging out with a girls softball team, so while you understand the family's desire to allow him to support his sister, you would really appreciate it if he kept a nice distance (watch from the fence in the outfield), not go on any away tournaments and show respect for the other parent's desire to keep their daughters safe and not have to feel on edge because of the presence of someone convicted of rape in the stands or close proximity to the team.

 

[iMlearning]

offender

We have a sex offender that would go to where we used to practice and play rec games. He was quite a large man and would stand at a distance and watch. We had a friend on the force check out his situation and he was allowed to be there but had to keep a certain distance. Our friend talked to him one night and let him know he had the right to be there but it made several people uncomfortable. He was polite and stayed away. .. he still goes to the park to get exercise.

 

[riseball]

Seems a bit unusual to discuss something like that in casual conversation. The other party may have been testing the waters to see if this would be an issue with you. You need to understand the circumstances of the rape charge in relationship to your well founded concerns. Is he an adult or a juvenile. Rape is generic lay term that encompasses a variety of aberrant behavior. An issue with an ex-girl friend or wife although egregious does not warrant the level of concern as something involving a minor child. You need more information to decide a smart course of action.

to the best of your ability find out more about the charge. You can then evaluate the facts as they relate to your situation. Then once he is released contact the probation office in the county where he lives. The PO will explain the terms of the probation and help you with your concerns. Then even if it is not against the terms of his probation they can exert influence in a multitude of other ways.

 

[Jojo]

I think the shark you see is less dangerous than the shark you don't.

Agreed. I've been around long enough to have witnessed this many times.

Once I was even contacted by one of my parents. There was a man going to the local league games in the area, not just softball, but soccer and other girl sports and taking pictures of them. He seemed harmless but a concerned parent called the police and they questioned him and things were not adding up and turns out he was selling pictures of the girls on-line on not so reputable sites.
My parent called me because she was called into the police station and had to identify her DD in one of the pictures they found on his camera.

As far you particular case, the one thing that strikes me strange is, why does he have to be at the games? Can he not be trusted to stay home?

 

[coachbob]

I think the shark you see is less dangerous than the shark you don't. I guarantee that your team has been around plenty of dangerous sex offenders at games. Many friendlies in SoCal look like they are sponsored by prisons if you were to judge by the spectators.

Squeeze
We are at one or two OC & surrounding friendlies each month, and while I agree there are some unsavory looking characters milling about, we haven't had any problem. I would love to know if there are any we should avoid. You can PM me.

Thanks