Players who bypass high school softball

[Out in Left Field]

This forum and others would not be in existence if there was not drama on TB teams, wow what a blanket statement that it is only HS. And 90 percent is from parents, not the kids. I told my boys to remove themselves from any drama, and they played for a coach who would not tolerate it from parents. Then there was no drama. I also clamped down on phones, etc.

Lots of complaining on this board about hS, but no one doing anything about it.....the HS coach is paid by you. You are also a parent who can tell the drama parent to stop or if you or the kid are the drama, change or be the parent. Do something.

 

[riseball]

Right or wrong the the TB and HS softball experiences are very different. The biggest mistake a HS coach can make is to try to run their program like TB. And a TB coach cannot run their team like a HS team. If players are going into it thinking it will be the same they are in for a shock. Likewise the college softball experience is very different than TB or HS. Which is why college rosters shrink significantly in the fall season as some players find out that college ball is not for them.

 

[Doug Romrell]

And as Doug points out having a HS Coach who is also a TB coach is a really bad idea. That situation always leads to some level of controversy.

Oh, he needed to do it to build the HS program, as softball was weak in this area.

HOWEVER, the old saying "Absolute power corrupts absolutely" seems to apply. I asked the HS coach in the summer of 2013 if my team might practice from time to time on the high school field. I was turned away, as that field is completely scheduled up with his PRIVATE travelball organization teams from 10U on up through 18U. I hadn't realized that he assumed he owned the field, which is actually owned by the school district. Oh well, it wasn't a big deal. We just go practice elsewhere.

Having my own summer team in the HS coach's school area is seen as trespassing, even committing a sin. The coach won't say it, but I use a variant of the Hanson principle in this regard--judge them by their actual actions not by what they say to you (talk is cheap).

 

[starsnuffer]

Choosing not to associate oneself with an utter jerk is an admirable trait and not something to be looked down upon.

Infact, I have much less respect for "adults" that automatically assume that other humans should compromise their morals, judgement, self respect, and safety to "participate in something bigger than themselves".

All we ever have in this life is time. How we choose to spend that time and who we choose to spend that time with are the two most precious decisions a human can make. Choosing to not waste ones time in the presence of a jerk is nothing to be ashamed of.

-W

 

[Doug Romrell]

Of course, there are "jerk" coaches in both high school and summer competitive "traveball" teams. I think keeping one's ego out of the stratosphere is part of being a good coach. Yet it seem to be impossible for some.

Let me also say that I would NEVER want to be a high school coach! It's generally a no-win situation with parents. That doesn't mean there aren't some very real problems with some of those coaches. There are problems with coaches in all sports, high school or not. It's just that some of the problems are due to abuse of power.

 

[riseball]

It might be that these myriad of reasons are more prevalent than I want to believe. My daughter is just entering high school. We've not fully experienced it.

You noted that your daughter played. If she did, I can't help but think that she had the school spirit necessary to have enjoyed and thrived in it, but there comes a point where it becomes unbearable for reasons out of her control.

Nothing against school spirit but it had nothing to do with that. She could care less. She lives to compete. At everything. When she comes home she still goes through the high scores on the X-Box and if she is not #1 she will play until she is. She plays softball because she is very good at it and it gives her the opportunity to compete. Truth be known if she could she would play ice hockey. But she was born to pitch a softball. Softball will pay for her bachelors and then her MBA. With those tools she will go into the business world to compete.

 

[CoogansBluff]

Choosing not to associates oneself with an utter jerk is an admirable trait and not something to be looked down upon.

Infact, I have much less respect for "adults" that automatically assume that other humans should compromise their morals, judgement, self respect, and safety to "participate in something bigger than themselves".

All we ever have in this life is time. How we choose to spend that time and who we choose to spend that time with are the two most precious decisions a human can make. Choosing to not waste ones time in the presence of a jerk is nothing to be ashamed of.

-W

FYI, in case it was it was something that I said ...

Key point: I'm not talking about teams ... whose coach is abusive or a total jerk. I get that.

 

[CoogansBluff]

Nothing against school spirit but it had nothing to do with that. She could care less. She lives to compete. At everything. When she comes home she still goes through the high scores on the X-Box and if she is not #1 she will play until she is. She plays softball because she is very good at it and it gives her the opportunity to compete. Truth be known if she could she would play ice hockey. But she was born to pitch a softball. Softball will pay for her bachelors and then her MBA. With those tools she will go into the business world to compete.

Good trait. But is there also value on a college team for someone who has that same sort of drive for her school?

I remember talking with a high school tennis player years ago who wound up going to Florida. She was nationally ranked. I asked why she played HS tennis, why it was important to her. It was school pride and the idea that she was playing for her community and her friends on the team. She said her school had to be the best at everything it did.

Isn't that the kind of kid you want on a college tennis team? Or does it matter? I don't know.

Years later, another D-1 recruit at the same school quit in mid-season. Not because she was being mistreated, or bad coaching. Just decided it wasn't worth her time, and did it in mid-stream. I wonder how she would do in college. If I can remember her name, I might go and look her up.

 

[CoogansBluff]

The girl that played for a competing TB org and sat the entire season on the Varsity bench while coach played lesser contributors from his own org. did not come back to HS ball afterwards. OP might judge her, I will not.

When the OP said he was ''finding myself being judgmental,'' that was not a point of pride. That was simply an acknowledgment, which was followed by several questions seeking insight to that I could later decide if being judgmental was appropriate. My goal here is to learn, not win an argument.

 

[starsnuffer]

FYI, in case it was it was something that I said ...

No, I just think it had to be reiterated.

Remember, HS coaches are pulled from pools of volunteers who can make themselves available after 3pm. Travel coaches (and rec ball) are pulled from volunteers who can be available after 5pm or even later. The former pool is very shallow, has not been cleaned in some time, and has some questionable objects floating in it.

I think that as more schools open up to having younger women who played the sport recently coach their HS programs, things will change. But until that time, really, having a "jerk" for a coach really is a big thing. If the team has drama or issues, I have to ask who is in charge of the team? What kind of adult blames children for their own success and failure?

-W