Not Pushing at 10U.

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May 3, 2018
75
18
Hope to get there soon. Probably won't happen today, though. My DD is making her pitching debut tonight. I'm going to do my best to not yell key phrases that make absolutely no sense to anyone but me and maybe, just maybe they make sense to DD. I think my best case scenario is freaking out on the inside, but quiet on the outside. Probably need to watch her innings from the truck on GC.

The looks I get when I holler out "dead fish" to DD is quite humorous!
 
Aug 2, 2019
343
63
I refrained from yelling the ridiculous cues. She reverted to HE mechanics. It did not go well. I suggested that next time she pitches how we have been practicing, it could help. She's going to think about it.:confused:
 
May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
She won't miss anything life changing by not playing travel ball at 10U. Hell, half the girls that are dedicating their childhoods to travel ball at 10U won't be playing by High School.

You're right - half of my DD's team from 10U TB isn't playing in HS. For some, the TB experience was too much. For others, they decided a different sport was a better fit. The half that are still playing are all pretty awesome players, and on a path towards playing college ball. IMO, whether or not a 10yo will still be playing in HS is irrelevant to the decision of whether or not to play TB at 10U. Make the choice based on their needs and wants at that moment. For my DD, 10U rec ball was boring and frustrating, and she asked to play TB. For her it was the right move at the right time.

EDIT: I disagree with the notion that young players are "giving up their childhood" (or something to that effect) to play TB. I've met a whole lot of young ladies that thrive on the hard work and dedication of playing a sport at a high level. It's not for everyone, sure. But for some, it's the right path.
 
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Strike2

Allergic to BS
Nov 14, 2014
2,044
113
This a 1000 times. She won't miss anything life changing by not playing travel ball at 10U. Hell, half the girls that are dedicating their childhoods to travel ball at 10U won't be playing by High School.

Sometimes the hardest part, especially if your kid has talent or potential, is realizing that it is THEIR talent or potential and doesn't belong to anyone else. The best thing you can do is give your honest opinion and advice and let her decide. What other people think.....who cares.

From my personal perspective....My DD is good. Damn good. Not top of the nation good, but good enough to say she is better than most. She's only a Freshman and she'll have plenty of offers from colleges. Not top line like Florida, but enough. Thing is....she has zero interest in playing past high school. She has zero interest in attending showcases. She has zero interest in being anything other than the best high school player she can be. She is told constantly how crazy that is, how much she is wasting this, that or the other thing, and on and on.

But the fact remains what she chooses to do (or not do) with her talents is HER choice.

THIS is the result of too much emphasis on playing in college, especially at the older ages. Whatever happened to playing the game because you enjoy it, and working to do your best even if there is no "next level" goal? DD enters final years of travel ball without any serious interest in playing in college. She's not "damn good", but a solid player who always gives max effort and never throws attitude towards any coach or team mate. She likes the idea of playing in college and could probably make a team somewhere, but realizes that where she's likely to end up going to school just isn't a match for her ability. Inevitably, we are quizzed about playing plans for college, and are met with incredulous looks when they learn that playing softball is not a priority.

I'm just happy that she insisted on playing another year even after I gave her a list of good reasons why she should consider quitting!
 
Sep 19, 2018
928
93
Sometimes the hardest part, especially if your kid has talent or potential, is realizing that it is THEIR talent or potential and doesn't belong to anyone else. The best thing you can do is give your honest opinion and advice and let her decide. What other people think.....who cares.

I feel like am pretty good at this. That is why I was OK with her playing down. but I did start the thread because of what other people said. Just to make sure.

We've had two practices. After the first practice she told me she made a mistake and wants to move up to the 12u team now. sigh. Her current team has 10 kids AND I agreed to be the AC. There is only 2 of us coaching. So moving up now is a no go.

My wife did ask dd if she wanted to play on the middle school team. DD was adamant, YES!!!! It is a spring sport so is a full 2.5 years away. But all of the travel girls in our town play school ball. So, if she wants to compete / start she'll probably need to start travel in spring of 2021.
 
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Jun 12, 2015
3,848
83
THIS is the result of too much emphasis on playing in college, especially at the older ages. Whatever happened to playing the game because you enjoy it, and working to do your best even if there is no "next level" goal? DD enters final years of travel ball without any serious interest in playing in college. She's not "damn good", but a solid player who always gives max effort and never throws attitude towards any coach or team mate. She likes the idea of playing in college and could probably make a team somewhere, but realizes that where she's likely to end up going to school just isn't a match for her ability. Inevitably, we are quizzed about playing plans for college, and are met with incredulous looks when they learn that playing softball is not a priority.

I'm just happy that she insisted on playing another year even after I gave her a list of good reasons why she should consider quitting!

I was 14 or so when I decided I'd go to college. At 9 or 10 I didn't even really understand what college was. Of course at 9 DD thought playing in college sounded awesome. They ALL do at 9 and 10. By 12U she was saying she'd only do it if she could just play softball and not take classes. lol She may change her mind again 5 more times before she graduates from high school. We have had people imply that we're wasting her talent by not putting her on one of the big name teams that travel all over, but it isn't what she wants. So really it would just be a waste of our time and money to do that. She plays for love of the game and she works to get better because she likes the feeling of accomplishing something. If she decides later she wants to play in college we'll course-correct then. I don't want to risk burning her out on the off chance she might want to play in college.
 
Jul 14, 2018
982
93
My wife did ask dd if she wanted to play on the middle school team. DD was adamant, YES!!!! It is a spring sport so is a full 2.5 years away. But all of the travel girls in our town play school ball. So, if she wants to compete / start she'll probably need to start travel in spring of 2021.

This has been DD's motivation since she started playing travel as a second-year 8U. Now you've got something you can use! Make sure she understands that the school ball starters have been in travel for a couple of years, and if she wants to play on her school team then she's got to move beyond just rec.

If you played at Spookynook, you're probably near me geographically. There are a ton of teams around, if she didn't feel like she fit in with her last team, try another one. And do some camps and clinics as well. DD has become adept at jumping right in with a group of strangers because I've made her do it so often!
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,132
113
Dallas, Texas
EDIT: I disagree with the notion that young players are "giving up their childhood" (or something to that effect) to play TB. I've met a whole lot of young ladies that thrive on the hard work and dedication of playing a sport at a high level. It's not for everyone, sure. But for some, it's the right path.

My DDs are in their 30s. Both played in college. One won a national championship in hoops. The other was all-conference D1. They both, of course, played TB (hoops and softball)

Full disclosure: They never had BFFs on their TB teams. They liked the kids of their teams and treated them with respect, but they didn't hang out with them other than for sports. They both played their chosen sport about 6 months out of the year. The other 6 months they practiced their chosen sport, but they played other sports or did band. Neither one approached burn out in their sports.

I asked them if they felt they gave up their childhood. They thought that was the funniest thing they heard. They both had a blast. For them, playing softball/basketball was fun. It was "play". They said they would do it all again in a heartbeat.
 
May 5, 2019
20
3
Minnesota, USA
My 2 DDs started when they were 8/10 (now 20-22) and I have coached/instructed 100's of other youth players...

So I have learned that you must simply ask her to "TRY IT"... or have another coach/parent/player ask her...

Your DD just needs some direction and a little encouragement... (i.e. young players just need to feel confident and secure)

If she is bored playing with girls that are at a lower "skill level", then moving her up might be a great "opportunity" for her!

But as @Eric F and other members have noted...

Don't FORCE her... just point her in the right direction.. and ask/help her to TRY IT... and she will hopefully like it!

Make it FUN and keep moving her forward... to become more amazing every day!
 
May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
My DDs are in their 30s. Both played in college. One won a national championship in hoops. The other was all-conference D1. They both, of course, played TB (hoops and softball)

Full disclosure: They never had BFFs on their TB teams. They liked the kids of their teams and treated them with respect, but they didn't hang out with them other than for sports. They both played their chosen sport about 6 months out of the year. The other 6 months they practiced their chosen sport, but they played other sports or did band. Neither one approached burn out in their sports.

I asked them if they felt they gave up their childhood. They thought that was the funniest thing they heard. They both had a blast. For them, playing softball/basketball was fun. It was "play". They said they would do it all again in a heartbeat.

EXACTLY! This might not be every kid, but it is some of them.

For my DD, she has picked up enduring friendships along the way - as have my DW and I. Some of these extend back to the beginning of our softball journey.
 

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