Leaving a team when they've done nothing wrong....

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Jul 16, 2013
4,656
113
Pennsylvania
I think #2 catcher will be happy. Unfortunately she plays for her private high school team as an 8th grader so the #3 may be filling in until May. This fact was actually one of the reasons we almost didn't leave. We felt terrible about leaving them in a bad spot. But we didn't want our window of opportunity to close. But, at least we did it now instead of waiting until March and the beginning of the Spring.

As an ex-travel ball coach it sounds to me like you handled the situation professionally and with class. That is all I ever wanted. If one of my players moved on to bigger/better opportunities, I was happy for them and felt as though I did my job.
 
Jul 31, 2015
761
93
*SIGH* Blech.....so as the title suggests, we left our team of 3 and a half years yesterday and they have done nothing wrong.

Sorry, but this one may be a long post.

A little backstory. We have played for the last 3.5 years for a local A class 14u (well....10u to present-day 14u) team in a small, local organization. All the girls were within 45 minutes of where we practiced. The HC did a hell of a job of developing local girls into A class players. Some of the girls have played with this coach since 8u. We typically played within an hour or two of our home area with the occasional jaunt into an adjacent state. If there was not enough competition in the local tournaments we would play up in an older division.

Well, back in October a really good national team about 4 hours from us got my DD's name and number from a friend of mine that coaches an A class team in Mississippi. They needed a catcher for the Ronald McDonald tournament in Texas. I couldn't work anything out for that weekend because I was out of town for my 40th B-day, however they dropped a little nugget that they were looking for a permanent catcher for the Spring/Summer. We turned them down and didn't think much of it. Well, our paths cross again when USSSA hosted an All-State games after the Fall season and my DD got partnered up with several girls from the interested organization in the 16u division, even though my DD is a first year 14u player. They got to see my DD in action behind the plate and she went 2 for 4 with a double and a single. Needless to say, I got a few more messages with some interest. Again, we turned them down. They hosted tryouts and were not able to get a catcher but picked up a few good bats and great fielders. So, again, they reach out to us. This time they had a tournament schedule and a plan for practices being that we are 4 hours away. So, this time we listened to what they had to say. Then I contacted the coaches which are all current or former D1 softball players, one of which is a former D1 catcher. Asked the hard questions, came up with pros and cons lists, etc. Held them off until the new year and we were finally able to work out a day and time to go to one of their practices. They had some talent. They had the defense, they had the pitching, and they had the bats.....the only missing piece was a catcher. They had girls that could catch but were not catchers as their primary position, if that makes sense. Well after some lengthy conversations over dinner and a long ride home we decided that this team would be a good fit.

My DD has been wanting to play a more national schedule and this new team is playing plenty of Triple Crowns, Showcases, the Ronald McDonald, T-Bolt Showcase, and the Colorado Sparkler. So it was the national schedule my DD wants. Also, from a developmental standpoint, having a coach that is a former D1 catcher fresh out of college was a huge plus. Unfortunately catchers are one of those positions that don't get a whole lot of time during a practice. Plus, they are as good as advertised. They checked a lot of boxes for us.

Now comes the sucky part.....breaking away from our current team. Sunday morning was an emotional one in our household to say the least. Our first phone call was obviously to the head coach. It caught him completely off guard, I'm sure. I mean hell, my DD literally just sold 29 squares on a Super Bowl board they were doing as a fundraiser. I'm sure it looked like we were completely onboard. The fact that we were having conversations and going to other team's practices did weigh heavy on us. Our second phone call was to one of the assistant coaches that my DD had an incredible relationship with. He treated her like his own daughter. That one was rough but we got thru it. We then called the other AC but he didn't answer. Before getting off the phone with the HC we made sure that it was okay that we addressed the team on GroupMe and he was fine with that. Typed up a big long sappy post and hit send. We got nothing but well wishes from all the girls, parents, and coaches.

BLECH.....that sucks!!! Things would be so much easier if the coaches were A-holes or if their was drama on the team. But there wasn't. The coaches are great, the parents are great, and the girls were great. We just felt like this was the proper move to get the experience and exposure that my DD wants. Anyways, sorry about the long post but this is the first time we have ever had to quit a team. The other times that we have had to change teams is because the coach was moving up with older girls, etc and we just had to go try out for new teams. So yeah, leaving a team that has been home for 3 and a half years kind of sucks. Ah well....onward and upward. It does make me feel better that one of the AC's said that we could absolutely come back if we didn't like it. That takes some pressure off of it. We will see I guess.


TL:DR....left an A class team that my DD has been on for 3.5 years for a national team and it sucks because the team has never done anything wrong.

You did the right thing, and you did it well.
No need for regrets.
 
Apr 25, 2019
295
63
Your decision is not uncommon.

Absolutely. I have read about it plenty of times here but it couldn't prepare us for what it was going to be like when the time came.

As for an update though, even though we are not required to attend the practices that are 4 hours away (we are required to go to the ones that are 2 hours away. We have girls from all over and meet at a field in the middle) we took the trip over the weekend in order to get fitted for my DD's uniform as well as take headshots for the recruiting flyer. So far so good. The parents seem chill and my DD seems to be fitting in well with others on the team. Everyone has been super accommodating and inviting. Fingers crossed this continues.
 
Apr 11, 2016
133
28
We are now in a similar boat, except that DD is playing for a C team trying to be Div B but we know will never get there. The team will be as good as the HC's daughter, which is a mid B at best. We go on vacation and hang out for poker nights frequently. We are even neighbors. DD just went on a private tryout with an A team, and she was like, "I want that." The A team is with a very good organization and will give DD a chance to play college if she ever chooses to. With the current team, she'd never get a chance. We will have to break the news soon. Most of the girls on her current team is also from her school, so it'll be tough on her.
 
Dec 2, 2013
3,655
113
Texas
We are now in a similar boat, except that DD is playing for a C team trying to be Div B but we know will never get there. The team will be as good as the HC's daughter, which is a mid B at best. We go on vacation and hang out for poker nights frequently. We are even neighbors. DD just went on a private tryout with an A team, and she was like, "I want that." The A team is with a very good organization and will give DD a chance to play college if she ever chooses to. With the current team, she'd never get a chance. We will have to break the news soon. Most of the girls on her current team is also from her school, so it'll be tough on her.
There will always be the haters that hate that you are improving while they stay status quo. After y'all leave the other parents will be looking around like what just happened? Where are they going? We need to move too! FOMO is real. The minute your kid steps on the field with a team full of "playas" it's palpable. The vibe is totally different.

As I always say, If you ain't in the loop, you ain't in the loop. Once you get in the loop, you realize you were out of the loop! You can tell other parents about what is inside the "loop" but they won't know, until they get in the loop. And only then, they will give you that look with the head nod as you pass each other at the field (slow motion).
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,264
113
As an ex-travel ball coach it sounds to me like you handled the situation professionally and with class. That is all I ever wanted. If one of my players moved on to bigger/better opportunities, I was happy for them and felt as though I did my job.
??
 
Sep 3, 2015
372
63
There will always be the haters that hate that you are improving while they stay status quo. After y'all leave the other parents will be looking around like what just happened? Where are they going? We need to move too! FOMO is real. The minute your kid steps on the field with a team full of "playas" it's palpable. The vibe is totally different.

This is 100% true, and very satisfying.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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