I freaking hate pitching

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May 12, 2016
4,338
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Thanks - We go to a Tincher Coach...... And that's the other thing..... for a 9/10 year old to learn that Rotation throw.... Jesus!!!!! So many things to go wrong.

I almost also regret starting her with Tincher - But, again, we'll see. I think Denny is coming to our town in a few months so, we'll see him... And I read his blog.

What also sucks about youth Sports and Pitching is that in the Rec leagues I see... the team that celebrates, Carries the trophy off the field and gets all the glory on Facebook is the same team coaches that cried all year about having no pitching and it not being fair..... So instead of Growing pains of working thru 2-3 girls learn a windmill, they trot out Girls just lobbing the ball and Win it all.....

So, the girls that Work at it 100x more get Zero Reward
.....

9/10 year olds, Rec league.. all the glory on FaceBook, come on man!!, lol. Growing pains are necessary to learn the proper way to pitch. Those girls who were taught to lob the ball over the plate will be lobbing the ball over the plate for rest of their lives if they do not experience these growing pains. The girls who went through the growing planes will have moved on to the next level or they will be one hell of a Rec pitcher. I'm happy for your DD for having fun doing something challenging, being mentally tough and dedicated, good on her!!
 
Dec 4, 2010
40
8
Lots of great advice here. I know its hard to try and enjoy the ride at this stage, but after dropping off DD#2 at college a few weeks ago would give anything to be back on a bucket at those early years. She was a #2 or #3 pitcher 10-14U, was not asked back to play on her first travel team at 10U, but as mentioned earlier once she caught up to everyone else's size and strength surpassed most and is a better player, teammate, and person beacuse of the early struggles and commitment to continuosly get better.

Pitching is like playing a second sport so while not easy, she wanted to do it. What cannot ever be replaced is all the time spent with her during these times...pushing her when needed, backing off when I could, letting her struggle, being mad at her, being happy, nervous, excited, etc. All the struggles are what makes the journey, just wish I had a better perspective of that back then.

10-12U parents are typically idiots, espeically if its their first DD going through travel. Its so easy to lose sight of this being a game...wish we would have been able to enjoy it more than we did vs getting too wrapped up in the results, especially early on.

She is playing in her first D1 double header this weekend against a team that will probably destroy her team...but either way we will be stopping for ice cream after the game, should have done that alot more.
 
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Sep 3, 2015
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OP, I hear you. My DD was the least intimidating kid on the team when she started playing and got into pitching in kind of the same way. She was small, not physically gifted, glasses, the whole bit. She was about 8 when she started. We played on bad rec and travel teams but she kept pitching. I didn't know where it would take her but she got better, we found a better PC, she moved to A ball and look at her now. She's 14, 5'8, skinny like a pole but man that kid can pitch. High 50's, great rise and be drop. All the flamethrowers and younger phenoms are pretty much gone and she has risen to the top.

It's a great feeling to be really good at something, especially knowing all of the hard work that you both have put in. It's also a great time to be together and have something. If she loves it, enjoy that ride together. I've been through those 21-2 games, I've been to tournaments where you know you have no chance. Things change.

Sent from my Pixel 2 XL using Tapatalk
 
Jan 22, 2011
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Don't have time right now to read through all the responses, but here are some quick thoughts-
1) Javasource did a great spiel about how the work ethic required to become a good pitcher is excellent preparation for being successful in life. I'll have to see if I caught that in video I took and can get permission to post it.

2) I never wanted my daughter to be a pitcher. I wanted her to be a catcher, but she has been a reasonable successful pitcher up to now. Now that she is 13, she needs to decide how much work she wants to put in to continue pitching, because 14u is a hitters game.

3) Try not to let your daughter see you stress out. When my DD pitched her first 14u PGF game I was nervous as heck, wound up watching most of the game from inside the snack bar where I could watch the game but she not see me.

4) It's her journey. As I tell her every 3-6 months, she has to want to be a pitcher. She can't do it because she thinks her parents want it. If she wants to be a pitcher, I'll spend money getting her the best pitching coaches possible. But its her journey, it has to because she wants it. Sometimes I half think she goes to pitching lessons because the two instructors I have her working with are great men and teachers so she wants to spend time with them, not necessarily because she wants to be a pitcher. But that is worth $45 of my money per week in my opinion at this point in her life.
 
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May 24, 2013
12,461
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So Cal
[MENTION=16100]Reaperjet[/MENTION]

The big thing that struck me from your first post is how hard this is for you. This isn't about you. It isn't your journey, it's hers. From your description, what I envision is a young player who is determined to succeed. You want her to quit because she isn't good right now. She wants to do the work it takes to get good. I suggest you celebrate her effort, not her results. Celebrate her determination to keep battling even when she isn't having a good day.

You're probably right that she won't play for Alabama, or any other top D1 school. So what? Is that the only goal that makes the journey worthwhile? IMO, softball is filled with life lessons about the value of hard work, learning to handle failure, teamwork, accountability, and so much more. My kid has loved playing the sport since she started at 8yo. She has worked hard, and has a goal of playing college ball. The reality is that she probably wont make it to the level of a top D1 player, but there are TONS of college softball opportunities out there - D1, D2, D3, NAIA, JC. The right fit is out there for my kid.

As others have mentioned, what is happening in her pitching right now is zero indication of the future. I've seen more 10U phenoms than I can count fade away. Many quit the game. The ones that have early body size and strength eventually get caught and passed up by smaller girls who developed good technique. Move a big, strong 10U back 5 feet and give her a bigger ball, and she becomes mediocre. I've seen that a ton, too. The two pitchers currently on my DD's 14U TB team are far from "big". The tallest of the two is 5'-5", and pretty lean. They both throw low-50s and survive with good control and decent movement. Both will play college ball, if they decide to keep playing that long. I believe it was Cat Osterman - one of the best pitchers ever to play the game - who was told at 12U that she should quit pitching because she would never be good enough.

Maybe your kid will shock the hell out of you and end up being the WCWS winning pitcher for Alabama. Someone's kid has to be that one. Whoever it is is going to be someone who was absolutely determined to succeed.
 
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Nov 17, 2017
73
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Also - her softball performance is NOT a reflection on you. You haven't 'failed' if she has a bad game or season.


.


It's not that I feel it's a reflection on me....Or that I have failed at anything other than helping put her in a really Stressful position early in her life that just maybe kids can do without........ If I knew then what I know now and the time and effort you need to put in to something that is mostly Hard Knocks I certainly would have steered her towards being the best Shortstop/Hitter she could be.....lol

I'd never recommend a Dad with a young girl to pitch.... I say the opposite..

I feel it's a lot of time for a 10 year old girl to spend on 1 activity when they have social life, Homework and other activities... Again, granted, if your kid is the next great thing, like she's an Olympic Gymnast or whatever - more power to you.... I just feel like it's a HUGE mountain to Climb.

And I also think it's important for 9/10 years olds to experience Success from the hard work...


Yeah, and Hopefully this thread turns into some Amazing story one day :)... I'm not going anywhere - just Venting in a place I knew I'd get some support

THANK YOU!!!
 
May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
I feel it's a lot of time for a 10 year old girl to spend on 1 activity when they have social life, Homework and other activities... Again, granted, if your kid is the next great thing, like she's an Olympic Gymnast or whatever - more power to you.... I just feel like it's a HUGE mountain to Climb.

What if that's what the 10yo girl WANTS to do?

In my experience, picking which 10yo softball player is going to be good in college - or even HS - is worse odds than betting it all on black in Vegas. Of the players that were "good" at 10yo that played with my DD, more than half aren't even playing at 14yo. The ones that have gone on to become talented 14U TB players with realistic chances at playing at a high level all have one thing in common - years of relentless, dedicated, hard work. 10yos can stand out on natural athleticism alone. Unless they put in the effort, they quickly get passed up by kids who put in the work.

And I also think it's important for 9/10 years olds to experience Success from the hard work...

If you want instant success, softball is not the sport for that. At any position. Softball is a game of failure.
 
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Jun 8, 2016
16,118
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Also - her softball performance is NOT a reflection on you. You haven't 'failed' if she has a bad game or season.
I am going to take the devil's advocate position on this for a second, since I do feel this way sometimes since I am the one who has taught my DD pretty much everything she knows to this point
regarding softball.

Question, if your daughter takes a college course and doesn't learn the material correctly do you only blame your daughter or should
some of blame be put on the instructor? I know that when I teach my college courses, if a kid puts the work in and still does poorly I feel horrible about
it and do some soul searching to figure what I could have done better. It doesn't mean I am a bad person or a failure at life in general, only that I have failed this student in some way..
How is it any different when you teach somebody to play a sport, other than the definition of failure by the student to needs to be reworked to be reasonable for the sport being played
and the overall natural ability (which also gets factored in when speaking of failure in academics) and age of the "student" needs to be considered. Plus in sports, you gave them half
of your genetic makeup so there is that too, but that is uncontrollable obviously. So ultimately their performance, at least part of it, is a reflection of you.

I've had this "discussion" with my
wife many times and while I understand what she is trying to accomplish (and you in turn) with the argument, logically it doesn't pass the smell test to me..

I think the bigger point here is that failing at a sport isn't the end of the world, regardless of where the blame is put...
 
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Nov 17, 2017
73
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9/10 year olds, Rec league.. all the glory on FaceBook, come on man!!, lol. Growing pains are necessary to learn the proper way to pitch. Those girls who were taught to lob the ball over the plate will be lobbing the ball over the plate for rest of their lives if they do not experience these growing pains. The girls who went through the growing planes will have moved on to the next level or they will be one hell of a Rec pitcher. I'm happy for your DD for having fun doing something challenging, being mentally tough and dedicated, good on her!!


I get it.. You know that Facebook comment was only B/C you want to see your kid succeed, to taste that feeling, even just once..... hey the team that won last year with Zero pitching - That was a magical ride and story for them... I almost cried...lol... They won like 3 games all year and rolled the playoffs... they did work hard, and it paid off.... I was so happy for them.

Nobody on that team worked at Pitching tho, they all enjoyed their free time and took grounders and Swung the bat a bunch lol.......
Pitching is an entirely different World from anything else in the game....

I'll talk to her before her 1st Travel game - I want her to know that it's not going to be easy this other team is Loaded for bear.
 

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