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HS Career is over

Sep 29, 2010
1,084
83
Knoxville, TN
Sorry to hear this. I don’t have to tell you and the other catcher parents how thankless the job of catchers, even the really good ones, can be. I just remind DD it’s the role she chose and there are others in the catching fraternity who do know their struggles. Although most who haven’t caught will never understand. Be proud to be a catcher and all that comes with it, good, bad and ugly!
 

Strike2

Allergic to BS
Nov 14, 2014
824
43
I'm sorry that happened to your kid.

I've grown to despise awards banquets. Most of the time, they're done very badly with respect to recognition. A handshake and a public mention is often as good as something that will end up in a cardboard box in a couple of years, if not sooner. That doesn't help an upset kid, but I assure you, she's not alone in this. Most of these awards are little more than recognition of "popularity" even if decided by the coach rather than a capricious group of teenagers. I recently attended an awards banquet (not softball) that lavished $10 plaques on some clearly less than stellar individuals for their alleged great deeds while DD sat quietly knowing that she's on her way to a far brighter future. High school is such a small part of what hopefully will be a far more significant set of achievements later in life. Don't let whether you received a cheap token define your experience.
 
Last edited:
Jun 19, 2014
825
28
Raleigh,NC
I have a feeling that she will love playing college ball even more. One of my daughter’s college teammate played 16 games with a total of 28 plate appearances her entire high school career. As a college player, she leads the team with 8 homeruns and is one of the team captains. She acts and looks like a team captain.


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Dec 5, 2012
4,103
63
Mid West
So DD HS career is over and they had their awards banquet the other night. Warning: Venting will start now. They did not even give her one word of recognition at the Softball portion of the night. She was devastated and I am left heart broken for her. I have never seen her cry so hard. She feel into my arms when we got home. This kid got 2nd team All District her Freshman year, 1st Team-Soph, Jr, and Sr years. Academic All District all 4 years. This is recognition from the other district coaches. Career Stats .444 avg, 11 HR, 34 dbls, 80 Rbi's,. This year HBP 10 times! Highest OBP .583. Slug .792. No other player in the past 10 years had these numbers over 4 years.

The coach said that she let the girls vote. Popularity Contest. They gave the Most Improved Player and Defensive MVP to the same person. How is that even possible? She gave up on several balls that went under glove, she let balls fall in front of her, she didn't throw anyone out. She has been on varsity for two years. My catcher has bruises all over body for blocking all the errant pitches. She gunned out many runners this year. She called the games from behind the plate. I could go on. I really want to email the coach and ask her how can my DD who led this team for 4 years not have her name on one single plaque over her career. She rec'd a participation certificate. Wow. Really! Such a disservice and slap in the face. This is how she will remember her HS career. I told her to finish out her summer run and look forward to the memories she will make playing on a college Softball team.
Wow .. that's awful. My heart breaks for her. If anything this is a teaching moment of perseverance!
Good luck moving onto college, I hope it gives her better memories.
 
Jun 27, 2018
199
28
I have a feeling that she will love playing college ball even more. One of my daughter’s college teammate played 16 games with a total of 28 plate appearances her entire high school career. As a college player, she leads the team with 8 homeruns and is one of the team captains. She acts and looks like a team captain.


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That right there gives me hope for the future...


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May 22, 2015
376
28
Illinois
Man, that's the pitts. As long as she knows in her heart what she meant to the team & the value she brought that's what really matters. A little recognition goes a long way though, so some acknowledgment would've been nice. Oddly enough I could see this same thing happening to my DD. She's a leader on the ball field, productive player, and year round work ethic is unreal for a high school kid. However she's not miss popular and is somewhat quiet away from the ball field.
 
Mar 26, 2019
82
18
Central Ohio
I'm so sorry this happened to your DD. From what you have described, she was definitely deserving of recognition. Having teammates vote might be a good idea for a couple awards, but many times the most talented athletes aren't popular among their peers, because many are jealous or have other reasons. The coach should be the one to recognize girls in your DD's situation. She was the MVP of the team and is moving on to play college ball. Tell her to keep her head up and she will make headlines in college.
 
Jun 27, 2018
199
28
Mudrunner I think you hit on something. I’ll try not to make this long, but I have a feeling I will. My daughter is also quiet and very much an introvert away from the field. She has a very small circle of friends and she likes it that way. Crowds and loudness overwhelm her. However on the field she has no problem being loud and calling out plays, and cheering on teammates.

Last season as a freshman she was at a private school with a big student body. She played every inning on JV and hit around .700.

She moved to a new school this year. Public school. That’s not the problem. Her teammates are not the problem. Her problem is she is not being given a chance by the coaches. They seem very set in their ways. Hesitant to change up anything. Starters miss practice (when we have it), with no consequences. Before you all say how do I know they are not excused, I’m talking about when it rains and they move practice indoors, the girls in school say they don’t feel like going, so they don’t. Sometimes we don’t even have practice. My DD works very hard all year. She takes hitting and catching lessons as well as tee work on her own. She is quiet, like I said. It always seem like she’s trying so hard to do the right thing and it doesn’t matter. She can’t wait to get back with her TB team.

So far this season I think she has seen 10 innings on defense. This isn’t a performance issue. When she played she did well. It just seems she’s in the background, an extra. 18 kids on the roster. Sometimes at practice only the starters work on situations and everyone else goes off to the side and works off tees. She’s done well. She has had a conversation with the coach. She just said the other catcher is better. My daughter can live with being the back up. But she’s not getting any innings anywhere on defense. Or actually hitting for that matter. (More on that in a bit) But she’s like how does she really know the other catcher is better when the coach barely ever saw her catch? They don’t catch in practice. When she got in games she did fine. She’s known on being a cool calm catcher. She doesn’t throw much. She doesn’t have too. She’s a great blocker and doesn’t get many steal attempts. The other catcher is more aggressive in throwing. The coach might like that. It’s ok. The other catcher is a great kid. This is not a slam on her. She actually would prefer to take some innings off. She also wants to try another position but that’s not happening either. My daughter cheers on all her teammates. I’m proud of her.

Hitting-this is where I think the trouble started. Her very first at bat with this team
She stuck out looking. I hate that more than anything but I didn’t say anything to her after the game. I knew the coaches already got in her ear. This is also unlike her. She said she doesn’t know what happened. She just froze. But I know this set her in a hole and she’s struggling to climb out. She was told they put her at DH because she can obviously hit, (they see it in practice). But ever since then in a game now she’s in her own head because the pressure to show the coach she can play. They told her if she don’t hit she don’t play. So now it seems she gets maybe one bat a game. Sometimes none. That translates into one or two bats every two weeks. How can a kid break a slump only seeing a pitcher one or two bats a week. They don’t do live pitching in practice. Anyway that’s her story. She’s fighting and continuing to cheer her team. I give her credit. It’s hard sometimes. She needs to return to the player she was last HS season and the player she was last Fall with her tournament team.


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Aug 12, 2014
540
18
But she’s like how does she really know the other catcher is better when the coach barely ever saw her catch? They don’t catch in practice. When she got in games she did fine.

So now it seems she gets maybe one bat a game. Sometimes none. That translates into one or two bats every two weeks. How can a kid break a slump only seeing a pitcher one or two bats a week. They don’t do live pitching in practice.
This is my big peeve - coaches who don't give kids a chance. How do you know how good a player is if you don't give her an opportunity to show it (even in practice)?
 
May 2, 2019
12
3
Wow. That's a bummer, OS. I recommend writing that letter, if for not other reason than to maybe open his eyes so future players don't have the same crappy experience. IS wish your DD all the best in college ball.

As the only freshman on the varsity team this year, and a the leader in almost every offensive category, I hope my DD doesn't have the same BS happen to her.
Two seasons ago my daughter (a freshman) led her HS varsity team in every major stat category offensively and defensively. She was named to numerous media related "teams" including an area all star team that rarely has freshman make the team.

Prior to the banquet her coach gave me a call to basically say that she wasn't going to give my DD any awards so she could learn to humble herself. I was quite surprised because if there is anything my 5 kids are not is conceited. Confident and capable, absolutely 100% but arrogant, cocky, uncoachable, absolutely not. It wouldn't fly in my household ever.

I was stunned to say the least, I didn't say much over the phone, just let her talk and I said ok coach is there anything else. She said no, I told her to have a good evening, and that was that.

I decided to email the coaching staff ask specific questions about how athletic recognition was determined, spoke briefly about my experience as a coach/admin and asked for advice what they would do if they were a parent in my shoes.

After they replied (all 3 with very different responses) I zipped them to the AD and VP.

I received what I'd call a blanket/expected response from the AD saying that "awards were up to the coach".

I further emailed the coaches in the league to find out how a player could lead the team and league in so many categories and be left off the all-league list. Their answers basically lay at the feet of our own HC.

We sat our DD down and explained earning things, what does deserve mean, what exactly an award is, being recognized at future jobs, and just life lessons in general. To our surprise, she already knew what we were alluding to and took it like a champ.

The banquet was the following week.
 

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