But sometimes this means making them stick out a non ideal situation (not talking abusive, totally different story), for the long term benefit of learning to honor commitments
how quickly some quit and move on
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radness
Possibilities & Opportunities!
- Dec 13, 2019
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Do you honor your commiment to someone who doesnt honor theirs?!
When situations change
can be time for a new assesment.
Not saying team hoping is the answer to change, that in itself is change.
To the point of learning lifes lessons, sometimes the lesson is recognizing being in a bad situation to move on.
like this situation~ kid joins a 12u team. coach says he will have no more 14 players on the roster. 3 weeks later they have three new players and the roster is now 17.
Several families may be fine if it doesnt effect there kid,
But the other players that do suffer playing time....dont want to stay.
The fact the coach did not follow through with what he told the players/parents that thought they were making a commitment to a 14 player roster. Paying for 60-70% playing time and now only getting 30%.
So players leave. ...in this case in the 1st month.
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again, if you
agreed, does not apply when you are blatantly lied to either, that is different. in this case I do not believe any guarantees were made to anyone (certainly not to DD, but we were confident because HC sought DD out as tryout season rolled around and wanted her to come out for his). this is a girl getting a few less innings at primary position than she thought (unless she really thought she would get 90% of the innings, which is unrealistic for this position), and sitting about one inning per game, which most girls do unless it is over in 3)
radness
Possibilities & Opportunities!
- Dec 13, 2019
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Understand different scenario's.
What stands out (to me anyway) is people have different reasonings for both goals of raising their children and figuring out the crazyness of team sports.
that's nice that you felt confident with the head coach seeking out your daughter to play for their team. But there are other people who have been in that exact situation and the coach did not follow through with what they told the family. Just because someone is a coach or a parent or player it does not mean they can't change their mind and can't replan how they're going to structure their team. Because a month later after picking players that coach may realize they didn't do a good job and need to re-evaluate the roster.
Or family picked a team they later see has a wrong fit.
things are always changing.
Perhaps leave the door open for opportunity is wise.
this is not pro or college. FAmilies are paying teams, not other way around. once coach accepts a player, they need to live up to all the expectations that were laid out, as long as the effort is still there on the part of the player. even if they realize they made a mistake, they have to accept the consequences, not go out and replace player midseason. if it means they are not competitive as they thought, so be it, you still need to play the girls you selected and develop them. That is what most families are really paying the team for (shwocase teams may be different, but as long as it is up front, OK).
radness
Possibilities & Opportunities!
- Dec 13, 2019
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Like the commitment to the roster you are commenting on!
It may simply be some coaches/parents/players
are interested in growing by putting in the time.
Others want/expect to win the next weekend after tryouts?!
Exactly why I avoided ever making promises regarding playing time or positions. Playing time is earned. Positions are earned. Yes, everyone had an opportunity to play on any team I coached, but they didn't always play as much as they wanted or the position they wanted. If they decided they wanted to leave, fine. But they could never tell someone (at least honestly), that they were promised something and didn't receive it.
FWIW, by the time we got to 16u, we no longer held tryouts. We had very low turnover, were very happy with our roster, and only added players that we knew and sought us out. Very little drama, and that is how I liked it.
- Nov 18, 2013
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I have a different take on this. The coach has let’s say 12 paying families. Do they cater to the one where the girl isn’t working out or the other 11 families? They can still work with the player to develop her and find playing opportunities. I believe they owe it to the rest of the team to upgrade a position if it’ll help them advance deeper in bracket play.
While there’s more to the game than winning, if you knock off a high caliber team with multiple college coaches following them it can quickly draw those coaches into following your team.
I’ll never forget 14U nationals when a smart rear parent with a team from Louisiana was quick to point out the colleges were there to watch his team and not ours. After beating them and a couple other high profile teams we had several coaches following our little no name MN team. That never would have happened if the coach wasn’t always looking to make us better.
no problem with after season is over, telling a girl/family we are not bringing you back, my whole point is once a coach accepts a player, they have a moral obligation to develop that player (barring lack of effort, etc.) througout the season, and you cannot develop if you do not play. just as I think a player leaving mid season (absent abuse type issues) is wrong. there should be a commitment both ways (I have seen in team contracts before that if a player leaves on their own midseason, they are still liable for all dues, not certain how enforceable it is), player to team (work hard, show up, be a good teammate), and team (ie coach to player, ie reasonable playing time, instruction, encouragement). upgrading a spot in midseason to me is just wrong (now bringing someone on in case of LT injury, girl leaving team, entirely different).
I wouldn’t let either of my DD switch teams mid season unless there were serious issues with the coach or other players that weren’t addressed after talking to the coach. My DDs have been there in the past with not getting the time or position that they wanted and my message to them was to continue to put in the work both at and outside of practice. If a change of scenery was needed i would do it after they finished their commitment to the team. Running away from a challenge isn’t something I’d want to teach my kids and persistence is an important lesson to come away with from youth sports in my opinion.
If the coach misrepresented something such as roster size or just turns put to be an rear that would be a different story. I see some large rosters here in NJ that makes me wonder how they keep them all happy. Age certainly would play a part in expectations for playing time but that should be spelled out by the coach during tryouts.
If the coach misrepresented something such as roster size or just turns put to be an rear that would be a different story. I see some large rosters here in NJ that makes me wonder how they keep them all happy. Age certainly would play a part in expectations for playing time but that should be spelled out by the coach during tryouts.
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