Help understanding the mentality of 10/12u tryouts

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Mar 28, 2020
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I am having a hard time with understanding the mentality behind softball tryouts. Then seem too cut throat for 10 and 12u girls.

My background…I have 28, 27, and 24-year-old children. They all played travel sports. Now we have two kids 12 and 11 that we are trying to figure out how they got here…LOL

My 11 year goes to try outs with one of her friends as moral support. During the try outs all the girl’s positions are up for grabs.

That is what I don’t understand. If the athlete improved over the year and they worked, hard no problems, why do they have to try out for their position again?

I can see it for maybe 16U or 18U that are nationally sponsored, but these are 10U and 12U Low A and B teams.

As a parent you paid as much as $500 plus a month to play under a coach….your child has improved, worked hard, private trainers but they could lose their position to someone off the street that happens to be more gifted.

How does that build team loyalty?

My oldest daughter played on the same travel basketball team from 7th grade until she graduated. They only replaced two girls. One moved and the other, well, she was done with basketball. They are friends to this day. They are like sisters. Every girl on that team got a full ride scholarship every single girl

My second daughter’s team started at rec and grow into a travel team. All of them got some sort of scholarship and we had allot fun. Heck the dads are coming out to watch her baby sister play.

Sorry for rambling….I am having a hard time with this…..putting everyone up for grabs….I don’t get it……it doesn’t make sense to me.

One tryout they cut the girls at the end and two of them were balling. The Dad said it a good lesson to learn. Why do they have to learn this lesson at 10/11 years old? They have their entire lives to work hard for something just to lose it to better talent…..but why at 10/11 I am having a hard time with this mentally.

I need help understanding
 
Apr 28, 2014
2,316
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Truth is that all of the positions are not up for grabs, just the one's who didn't improve. Problem is that in today's society if you tell a parent that their kid didn't improve or is not good enough they will sue you or bash you on social media. So because of that coaches say every position is up for grabs and behind the scenes they tell the kids who are staying that they are guaranteed a spot.
 
Mar 28, 2020
285
43
Truth is that all of the positions are not up for grabs, just the one's who didn't improve. Problem is that in today's society if you tell a parent that their kid didn't improve or is not good enough they will sue you or bash you on social media. So because of that coaches say every position is up for grabs and behind the scenes they tell the kids who are staying that they are guaranteed a spot.

Ok that makes sense.......I am telling you it was driving me crazy. Why let a kid go that works hard.....but if that is cover then I get it.......Social Media wasn't big when my girls played.....
 
Apr 28, 2014
2,316
113
Ok that makes sense.......I am telling you it was driving me crazy. Why let a kid go that works hard.....but if that is cover then I get it.......Social Media wasn't big when my girls played.....
My kid wasn't good enough at 11. Luckily her coach told her point blank. She took that and used it as motivation. Only 6 years ago but different culture. We weren't happy as parents but knew he was right and now she's better for it.
 
Mar 28, 2020
285
43
My kid wasn't good enough at 11. Luckily her coach told her point blank. She took that and used it as motivation. Only 6 years ago but different culture. We weren't happy as parents but knew he was right and now she's better for it.
yea same with my current 11 year old.....she is more talented than my older two girls were at this age, but she isn't mentally ready. She gets bored easy and just wants to have fun. So she goes with her friend to support her during tryouts.....seeing girls crying isn't helping my case.... :) LOL
 
May 29, 2015
3,731
113
Truth is that all of the positions are not up for grabs, just the one's who didn't improve. Problem is that in today's society if you tell a parent that their kid didn't improve or is not good enough they will sue you or bash you on social media. So because of that coaches say every position is up for grabs and behind the scenes they tell the kids who are staying that they are guaranteed a spot.

I'll modify that ...

Truth is that all of the positions ARE up for grabs. Except the positions played by the daughters of each of the four coaches, the head coach's neighbor's kid, the daughter of the mom/dad who keep the book/Gamechanger, and the sponsor's twin daughters. So ... ALL the positions ARE up for grabs if you want to play LF.
 
May 6, 2015
2,397
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yeah, it basically gives coaches an out to cut whomever they like, and it may not always be related to the player (crazy parent, none of those here right ;), parents who own or dont have a pole barn, whose parent is on board of local rec league so can secure free lighted fields, etc.)

but it can be beneficial to the kids as well. on DDs first real travel team (10u), team was very good, after tryouts (on phone, not on field) Hc talked with all three of us, said DD was welcome back, but was 3rd on depth chart at her preferred position (and no better than second on depth chart at secondary position), and said if PT was our goal, we might want to look at other options, very constructive discussion, we left for other teams (still trying to get off that merry go round). DD still sees that HC for lessons (only about 4-5 families left now a few years later on that team).

but telling them immediately after tryouts on the field or parking lot or whatever, that is just plain wrong/stupid. make it phone call the next day or whatever.
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
Mentality is the perspective we bring!

Awareness of the dynamic around us is the knowledge we take with us.

Deciding where you fit in with your own
*goals, common sense, principles, is how deciding the best fit tends to happen.
 

Strike2

Allergic to BS
Nov 14, 2014
2,044
113
For many, if not most established teams, the "tryout" with "all positions open" is kabuki theater. In order to attract new players (and their parents), the team needs to put on a decent show. Having all your best players out there is far more impressive than holding a small workout for the few spots that may be open. It's tedious and potentially stressful if the coach doesn't communicate your status ahead of time.

That said, if someone really isn't welcome back, the HC should let them know ahead of time. This isn't the NFL...cutting a current player after a tryout is a crap thing to do. I have much stronger words for anyone who does that to a 10/11yo.
 
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