Help! Do I say anything or not? (long read sorry but needed)

Welcome to Discuss Fastpitch

Your FREE Account is waiting to the Best Softball Community on the Web.

Jun 20, 2015
848
93
Well I have my suspicions.

The new coach was 26 at the time and all the men were at least 55. I believe the AD wanted a younger female because she could relate to the players better and was a player not too long ago.

The guy who ran the program the year the HC died told me he met with the AD and told him that the female was not ready to be a HC yet. He even offered to show her the ropes as it were for a year. I guess she wasn't open to that and said no, I'm ready now.


Sounds like a recipe for the fuster cluck that you are dealing with now.
 
Dec 15, 2018
809
93
CT
I think many reasonable adults overestimate the value of being a former player and underestimate the difficulty of transitioning from player to coach.

I definitely place some value player experience, but I would value more a player who has played for a really good coach - or a known "coaching school".

F'rinstance, my college wasn't known (until very recently) for its baseball program - I think my senior year we went 14-38 or something. But the HC was recognized as being an excellent coach (picked many times as AC for team USA). Just from the guys I played with in the mid 90's, there ended up being 5 D1 coaches (including Duke, ND, Columbia), and a bunch more other college level and HS coaches.

Anyway, something to be said for coaching trees, and not just plucking a former player because she played.
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
Few things stick out on this.
1. With your years involved they did not consider interviewing you NBE for varsity head coach.
2.The AD hired someone else.
3. New head coach spoke upfront to you about loyalty to them.
Did you at that point say
'i will be loyal to the school and help you new HC the best you can?' or did you just jump on board?
4. LETS NOTICE THIS~
Anytime programs coaching change
THERE WILL BE CHANGE!
immediatly or over time.
Change was inevitable!
5. People complaining
AKA parents.... if they want change should speak up to the AD. or complaining means nothing.
6. Are you on board or not?
Yes if you speak up against the HC there will be some oddness.
Because at this point do you actually think your one complaint standing alone is
influence enough to get rid of head coach?
Remember you were not first choice in the first place...
Rather seems you were the only one left from the old crew.
The new HC threw you a bone ASKING are you on board to support them. And you accepted!!!
*if your individual style of coaching is not in agreement with her coaching style
YOU NEED to make a decision for yourself!!!
Because
7. What you have is an JV coaching position offered ( or rather) kept on by the new VHC.
Speaking up will absolutely put your JV HC position in an awkward position.

My simple advice,
if your planning to still coach at that h.s.
Focus on your j.v. team!
Advise those whom may be complaining in your ear to take there complaints to a level that may help like the AD. Or Principle.
Generally speaking you are not the complaint department!

*Work with what you have to make your players have the best experience they can have.
Lead by example!


( btw have noticed parents will complain to anyone who will listen, they complain to start a fire for someone else to put out. IF it were a real and truely horrible thing going on
*Do you think the parents would have already immediatly contacted the principle???!!!
Because at some point the AD is part of this delema, if it is one.)
....you have a team right?!
 
Last edited:
Jan 5, 2018
385
63
PNW
Few things stick out on this.
1. With your years involved they did not consider interviewing you NBE for varsity head coach.
2.The AD hired someone else.
3. New head coach spoke upfront to you about loyalty to them.
Did you at that point say
'i will be loyal to the school and help you new HC the best you can?' or did you just jump on board?
4. LETS NOTICE THIS~
Anytime programs coaching change
THERE WILL BE CHANGE!
immediatly or over time.
Change was inevitable!
5. People complaining
AKA parents.... if they want change should speak up to the AD. or complaining means nothing.
6. Are you on board or not?
Yes if you speak up against the HC there will be some oddness.
Because at this point do you actually think your one complaint standing alone is
influence enough to get rid of head coach?
Remember you were not first choice in the first place...
Rather seems you were the only one left from the old crew.
The new HC threw you a bone ASKING are you on board to support them. And you accepted!!!
*if your individual style of coaching is not in agreement with her coaching style
YOU NEED to make a decision for yourself!!!
Because
7. What you have is an JV coaching position offered ( or rather) kept on by the new VHC.
Speaking up will absolutely put your JV HC position in an awkward position.

My simple advice,
if your planning to still coach at that h.s.
Focus on your j.v. team!
Advise those whom may be complaining in your ear to take there complaints to a level that may help like the AD. Or Principle.
Generally speaking you are not the complaint department!

*Work with what you have to make your players have the best experience they can have.
Lead by example!


( btw have noticed parents will complain to anyone who will listen, they complain to start a fire for someone else to put out. IF it were a real and truely horrible thing going on
*Do you think the parents would have already immediatly contacted the principle???!!!
Because at some point the AD is part of this delema, if it is one.)
....you have a team right?!
All good points RAD and yet my DS baseball team had similar situations. But players, former players, parents Took concern to AD and principal. Only when with in a weeks time the coach threatened to fight players in the parking lot and a subsequent DUI where he hit a off duty sheriff....did he get the opportunity to “resign”
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
All good points RAD and yet my DS baseball team had similar situations. But players, former players, parents Took concern to AD and principal. Only when with in a weeks time the coach threatened to fight players in the parking lot and a subsequent DUI where he hit a off duty sheriff....did he get the opportunity to “resign”
This is a HUGE POINT ☝☝☝

Notice the HC was not removed in lue of predicament.
Only to cause what sounds like damn good video we missed ;)

AD is NOT the top at a high school.
AD did the hiring of said HC.
So whom is ultimatley responsible for correcting problem?
Either AD has a problem they know and let go or
AD has to~
1. Do nothing see if gets worse.
2. Apply pressure to VHC
3. Apply pressure back onto complaining jvHC
 
Last edited:
Jan 5, 2018
385
63
PNW
I think many reasonable adults overestimate the value of being a former player and underestimate the difficulty of transitioning from player to coach.
Exactly it’s the flip side for the “daddyball” complaint

know a player who left a team because they felt it was daddyball and needed non parent/former player coaching. Went to team
With former college player non-parent coaches etc. left that team because of bad coaching. And it was bad coaching. The parent said we
Should never have left first team. We didn’t realize we actually had good
Coaching

good coaching is good coaching. Regardless of dad/mom or non-parent/former player

look for good coaching
 
Jan 5, 2018
385
63
PNW
This is a HUGE POINT ☝☝☝

Notice the HC was not removed in lue of predicament. Only to cause a what sounds like damn good video we missed ;)
That was my point

was actually a hit and run DUI Too.

this guy was a tool and shiuld
Not be coaching anyone let alone youth.
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
That was my point

was actually a hit and run DUI Too.

this guy was a tool and shiuld
Not be coaching anyone let alone youth.
h.s. coaching situations can be like a toilet trying to flush but wont,... just a swirling bowl of ____!
Where plunging to try and fix just causes back-splash.

@NBE you come across as a good person in softball!
Keep your hands clean and keep doing the right thing with the players you get to coach.
Your team can have a great experience!
 
Dec 11, 2010
4,713
113
F'rinstance, my college wasn't known (until very recently) for its baseball program - I think my senior year we went 14-38 or something. But the HC was recognized as being an excellent coach (picked many times as AC for team USA). Just from the guys I played with in the mid 90's, there ended up being 5 D1 coaches (including Duke, ND, Columbia), and a bunch more other college level and HS coaches.

Anyway, something to be said for coaching trees, and not just plucking a former player because she played.
This is an AWESOME point.

A great example of an adult modeling behavior and players learning from it. Or as I like to say “show ‘em how they are supposed to act”. This coach inspired his players. They are going on to inspire other players. That is different level stuff.

Hey, y’all..... We talk about developing players. That misses a step in the process. We should be putting effort into developing coaches. When that process “takes” and you start having clusters of good coaches in one spot, great things happen. It starts hitting critical mass and it sustains itself. Goodness begets goodness.

This is a long process. It takes years in the real world. It’s worth it. In softball, in your workplace, at home.... get it to critical mass.
 
Last edited:

Forum statistics

Threads
42,830
Messages
679,478
Members
21,445
Latest member
Bmac81802
Top