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Dec 11, 2010
2,968
113
@Rolling Hard at some point you will obviously talk to your DD’s future college coach, and in depth. There is a great thread elsewhere in this section about what questions you should ask. I just want to make sure that people understand that ***a showcase*** especially ***their first showcase*** will not be that time or place with very few exceptions.

In the excellent book “Finish It”, the author wrote about how Patrick Murphy made an early point with freshmen that “this isn’t about you. The sooner you understand that, the better this will go for you”. (I probably mangled the quote but you get the idea.) I think it’s good for players to understand that early. It will serve them well.
 
Apr 16, 2010
888
43
Alabama
@Rolling Hard at some point you will obviously talk to your DD’s future college coach, and in depth. There is a great thread elsewhere in this section about what questions you should ask. I just want to make sure that people understand that ***a showcase*** especially ***their first showcase*** will not be that time or place with very few exceptions.
Definitely true. Do not try and strike up a conversation with them. One thing I have watched is how they interact with other coaches and carry themselves in public. I have spent a lot of time talking to coaches at tournaments about our team. The ones that are open and friendly towards me and other coaches seem to have a good reputation among people I ask about them as far as how they treat players on campus.

At the Legacy one year I watched a coach get absolutely ticked off because a mother had stopped for 10 seconds and sat behind the back stop to tie her small child's shoe. She was rambling about "Doesn't she know how to act at a showcase?" and "I wouldn't recruit anyone off that team.". We were in between games and I had just made it to the back stop to hang our fliers. No umpires even close to coming to the field. It left a bad taste in my mouth and it's a person I would never want my DD around.
 
Dec 2, 2013
1,480
113
Texas
Sometimes I wonder if what DD's HS coach wants - because the players he always plays - have the worst attitude (IMO) when they don't get a hit. He is usually coaching 3B so he might not see the crying when they walk off the field. I get being upset but being a total jerk to your teammates is what drives me crazy. DD will always try to say something nice to them or give them a high five and they breeze past her.
DD had twin teammates that were like this starting in 10U. They could not handle failure, and would go to the end of the bench and boo hoo their brains while being utterly unconsolable EVERY time they got out. As a coach, I hated it and I hated that they could not control themselves. Crazy story in 10U. We were in the championship game against a team that we just could not get past. They had a pitcher (BIG12) that was dominating us every time we played. So we were in the middle of getting run ruled and I am yelling directions to the CF who happend to have the same name as pitcher. I see that she is upset and crying. I call time and walk out to see what is going on. She tells me that I can't be yelling at her while she is pitching. Huh? OH!! No I am was telling CF to move over. I ask her if she is having fun. She says NO! I then say give me the ball. I tried taking the ball from her and she wouldn't give it to me. I attempted 3 more times and we are going in a circle. Felt like that scene in the Bad News Bears movie. She finaly relented, another pitcher came in and we got run ruled for a valiant 2nd place finish.

By the time HS came around these two girls were all about themselves. Most seasoned TB players would share info about the pitcher's tendancies when they go by the next batter, not these girls. DD would stand there watching them breeze past them not wanting to share anything while DD had her High 5 hand raised. They were still living in the grief of getting a ground out, pop out or whatever. It was all about themselves. Pretty poor attitudes, but other lesser girls would worship these girls while lavishing them with attention. It was sickening to watch. My DD was so ready to leave HS.

One of the twins was the pitcher, and could have played somewhere in college, but she expected for whatever reason that college coaches would come to her. I doubt that she ever sent any emails to any coaches. She did attend a camp with my DD at her future college and looked pretty good compared to the other pitchers there. I asked mom how it went when we got back home and she said the coach didn't email them. Are you effing kidding me? Totally delusional and would put blame on others rather than themselves.
 
Jul 14, 2018
525
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Just want to say thanks for all of the great info on this thread so far. DD is playing in her first showcase this weekend. She’s only in eighth grade, so it’s just to get a taste of the experience before it starts to count.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Mar 28, 2014
775
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The idea or belief that the coach is some unapproachable God is bullshit. If a coach was interested in my DD then he going to have to talk to me too. She is my DD. There is no magic birthday in which she is no longer my DD. I would much rather have my DD go to a school where I could say "people I trust my DD's life with" than A P5 school with a berating, tyrannical, old school jerk coach.
Speak it loud so they can hear you in the back pews!!!!

Yes brother, YES! If the coach doesn't want to talk to me then the coach won't be blessed with my DD attending thier school. This one way street stuff is BS. My DD ain't recruiting no coach, the coach is recruiting my DD. If my DD is not good enough to be recruited and has to do all of the recruiting then so be it, she'll be just fine in life without having played softball for some prima donna softball coach who thinks they don't have to do some crootin'.
 
Jul 28, 2016
16
3
Speak it loud so they can hear you in the back pews!!!!

Yes brother, YES! If the coach doesn't want to talk to me then the coach won't be blessed with my DD attending thier school. This one way street stuff is BS. My DD ain't recruiting no coach, the coach is recruiting my DD. If my DD is not good enough to be recruited and has to do all of the recruiting then so be it, she'll be just fine in life without having played softball for some prima donna softball coach who thinks they don't have to do some crootin'.
So do you and Rolling Hard have committed daughters? I mean I get it. You want to be part of the process, but like it or not, most all coaches aren't really interested in what you have to say, especially in the early stages..
 
Jul 22, 2015
425
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So do you and Rolling Hard have committed daughters? I mean I get it. You want to be part of the process, but like it or not, most all coaches aren't really interested in what you have to say, especially in the early stages..
I haven't found that to be the case. Maybe not for the initial conversation, but coaches want parents to be involved because there simply isn't much sense in them getting very far down the recruiting path if mom or dad are going to say no in the end.
 
Mar 28, 2014
775
93
I haven't found that to be the case. Maybe not for the initial conversation, but coaches want parents to be involved because there simply isn't much sense in them getting very far down the recruiting path if mom or dad are going to say no in the end.
Mom and Dad write the checks for that portion of school that isn't covered by scholly so the coach better be listening to what the parents say, and yes I mean early on, or like you say they won't get very far with kids and will end up with a roster of walk-ons.

Any coach that thinks they can bully parents into thinking they don't matter won't last very long.
 
Dec 2, 2013
1,480
113
Texas
When college coaches were recruiting my DD, I don't ever remember them asking to speak with me. Yes. Ultimately the parents are involved in the process, but it's more like a fly on the wall experience. At showcases, coaches wanted to speak with DD, not me and most conversations did not include me for the most part. Did I speak with the coach during the campus tour? Yes, but I was in the back seat. Coaches were more engaged with DD, and I would comment here and there since DD was the star of the show. When DD was offered a spot at the end of the tour while we were in the office, and she said yes. Coach looks at me and mom and says is mom and dad okay with this? Every experience will be different for every player. Good luck!
 
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