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Coach Leading Personal Attacks

Jul 17, 2008
2
0
I am currently having a huge problem on my team.

This past week I was pitching in a game where absolutely nothing seemed to go our way. We made at least 10 errors on defence and had only 3 hits. Although we lost by 7 runs I allowed only 2 earned runs.

After the game we were discussing what we need to do to improve before our upcoming tournament and what we were doing wrong during that particular game. Our head coach and several players proceeded to tell me that regardless of the score, I still pitched well. That is when the problems started.

The assistant coach on the team stepped in right away and contradicted their statements and started to place the blame entirely on me, in front of the entire team. I only allowed 4 hits the entire game (a double and 3 singles), yet somehow I was "rocked". She continued this personal attack on me until my father, another assistant coach stepped in.

After all this the coaches had another meeting where this coach expressed some more hateful comments geared toward me and my father. All of these comments came as an absolute shock to everyone, including the head coach.

The big dilemma I am facing is whether or not I can continue to play for this team. The head coach assured us that he would deal with this situation, but I don't think I can play if the assistant coach is allowed to stay on, especially after she expressed so much hatred toward me. What should I do if this assistant coach is still part of the team? Do you have any suggestions on how I can get this situation off my mind (I've tried distracting myself with other activities, but all thoughts drift back to this)?

Please help.
 

Jul 14, 2008
10
0
I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
As far as you are concerned, I don't think there is anything *you* can do.
Your father, being an assistant coach, should discuss with the head coach and resolve to change this behavior or remove her from the coaching staff. Trust in them that this will happen and don't consider leaving the team until you are 100% sure nothing has been done and nothing is changing.
There is no reason for that, especially in front of the team. It sounds like you did very well.
 

Ken Krause

Administrator
Admin
May 7, 2008
3,420
38
Mundelein, IL
This is definitely an issue for the head coach. He has to inform this assistant that under no circumstances is she to attack any individual player. Failure to comply means she's not coaching anymore.

One of the jobs of an assistant is to mitigate any harshness coming from the head coach. (Head coaches sometimes have to take a hard line in order to bring a team out of the doldrums, but it should never be directed at an individual either.) If the assistant is causing the problems, there is a breakdown in roles and responsibilities.

It sounds like your head coach was doing the right thing in bringing the team together and asking what they need to do in order to improve. He was probably blind-sided by the assistant and thus not prepared to deal with it at the time. I would say trust him to handle the situation. If there isn't a change, then you might want to think about other options.
 

halskinner

Banned
May 7, 2008
2,695
0
I am currently having a huge problem on my team.

This past week I was pitching in a game where absolutely nothing seemed to go our way. We made at least 10 errors on defence and had only 3 hits. Although we lost by 7 runs I allowed only 2 earned runs.

After the game we were discussing what we need to do to improve before our upcoming tournament and what we were doing wrong during that particular game. Our head coach and several players proceeded to tell me that regardless of the score, I still pitched well. That is when the problems started.

The assistant coach on the team stepped in right away and contradicted their statements and started to place the blame entirely on me, in front of the entire team. I only allowed 4 hits the entire game (a double and 3 singles), yet somehow I was "rocked". She continued this personal attack on me until my father, another assistant coach stepped in.

After all this the coaches had another meeting where this coach expressed some more hateful comments geared toward me and my father. All of these comments came as an absolute shock to everyone, including the head coach.

The big dilemma I am facing is whether or not I can continue to play for this team. The head coach assured us that he would deal with this situation, but I don't think I can play if the assistant coach is allowed to stay on, especially after she expressed so much hatred toward me. What should I do if this assistant coach is still part of the team? Do you have any suggestions on how I can get this situation off my mind (I've tried distracting myself with other activities, but all thoughts drift back to this)?

Please help.
Ok. First question; is that other asst coach's daughter on the team??? Is she a pitcher??? There is obviously some team politics going on here. Is she trying to get the head coach's job???

You pitch the best you can pitch and, GO OIUT AND PROVE HER WRONG!

People are going to be talking trash about you if you are a pitcher worth her salt. Granted, that trash talk usually comes from the other team. but it's still trash talk.

If the other coach's kid plays a different position, did she make errors that game??? Is the coach trying to draw attention away from her own kid's errors??

If this is how the asst coach is, the head coach of a team sometimes has to play surgeon and cut the cancer out before it spreads.

And he better do it quick from the sounds of it, before this coach creates so much discontent there is a major falling out among the parents. Is the coach trying to start her own team???

Something is behind the attacks. Find out what it is.

Hal
 
Jul 17, 2008
2
0
Thank you very much for all of your reply's so far.

To address Hal's reply, this coach doesn't have a daughter on the team but she does have obvious favourites (one of which is the third pitcher). It's interesting that you mention that she may be trying to take over the head coaching position, because I have noticed that she is often unhappy with the way my head coach sets the lineups and runs things.

Unfortunately I don't have a lot of options available since the season is winding down up here and we only have two major tournaments left. I am still awaiting a call from my coach to find out whether or not he has dismissed this coach.
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
5,744
38
Dallas, Texas
Sparkie, my DD was a successful D1 pitcher, so I'll tell her what I would tell her:

If you are going to play in college, you better get used to a** chewings--whether deserved or undeserved. It comes with the territory. If you are going to quit every time an assistant coach doesn't like the way you pitched, prepare to change teams every couple of seasons.

You chose to be a pitcher. You are the people the press interview after a game. Pitchers get much more credit than they deserve when the team wins, so, don't be surprised when you get more blame than you should when you lose.

Your team lost. Since there is no "I" in "TEAM", it is your fault (along with everyone else on your team). Personally, I think the HC was crazy to tell you how great you did when the team lost. That makes no sense at all.

Some questions:

How many walks did you allow? (If you walked even one batter, you didn't pitch well.) Did you pitch the best game you could?

Your job as a pitcher is always "get the next batter out", no matter what. Stats like "earned runs" and "unearned runs" are stats that a Daddy keeps to prove that his DD can pitch. The only stat that really matters is whether you won, and the only thing that matters is whether you pitched the best game of your life.
 

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