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Coach dislikes my DD ?

May 9, 2008
432
0
Hartford, CT
First of all:
1. we knew my DD would not play or pitch all the time when we decided on her team.
2. we do realize the best players play

She has gone to more practices than most of the players, she works hard and she always has a good attitude at practice.
She is pretty much ignored when she is there (by the coach)

She is not the most athletic or skilled player by any means.

She cannot hit. We have taken her to several batting coaches and the concensus is that plate time is needed as most of tis is in her head....mechanics pretty good.
Her coach will not put her a bat because she cannot hit ....we are going in a circle with this one.

Second pitcher on team with little pitching time, but very good performance when she does pitch. She is a good pitcher. (45-47, hits spots extremely well, varies speed often and effectively) .. Pitcher #1 deserves to be #1.
Coach was told that my DD needs to pitch more by someone above him.

At practice she practices only in the outfield, no infield at the mound.
She catches outfield fine, good arm, knows where to throw when.

My biggest concern:
We have played some very weak teams. Several mercy by 10-12-15+ runs by 3-4 innings. The level of the opposition was very clear prior to creating line up.
Why are the least played players on the bench for these games?
Why is it necessary to pound a team like this and not play kids who sit most of the time?

Do we stay...or do we put her on a weaker team so she plays more?
 
Jan 15, 2009
585
0
Personally, I'd put my daughter where she would play more. Doesn't sound like this team would miss you, but somewhere else she could be fill a larger role and develop her skills.

Sounds like there is no commitment to improving the weaker players on the team, that's going to hurt when 2-3 of the top leave/quit/move/get jobs in a few years and your wondering why you didn't pitch #2 and #3 more in games where it didn't matter if you won or not.

Personally, in league play I like to put the struggling batters at the top of the lineup to get them more cuts, knowing that they will get less or none in some games at tournaments unless they can make progress during league games.

We had a #3 pitcher in 12U that we pitched every third game that 2 years later is a great pitcher that has been contacted by 2 different club programs to pitch for their 16U teams next year.
 
May 9, 2008
432
0
Hartford, CT
Coach DD likes?

My DD plays LL as well.
Pitches and 3rd base ... but 14 kids on team and equal play so she doesn't get enough time there either.


I am wondering if I am justified in my feelings ... but I do realize the areas where she is weak...
play weaker teams should put in the four who get very little time but doesn't.

Pitcher #3 plays 100% as she is catcher / 1st base....pitches a little less than my DD, is no where near the level my DD is (my DD pitches 1st 4 of game we are 6-0, puts #3 in 5th and she walks 5 and the score is now 6-4, then puts #3 back in inning 6, we are now up 6-5, puts in #1 to finish)
(walked 8 in game this weekend)
(my DD generally walks 0-3 in 7 innings, similar to #1 stats as far as walks)


At some p[oint we will have to find a venue for her to hit ... it will notg et better unless she is given time and patience.
Others have been given a lot of chances ...
I do the stats keep the book....

talking to him is not useful as he considers it a challenge/insult ...
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
5,921
83
Dallas, Texas
IMHO, the coach is a ***k. He doesn't know how to teach.

For me:

(A) During the elimination part of a tournament, put the best players out there who will give my team the best chance to win. I will substitute players, because I don't want someone exhausted on the field.
(B) During the pool games, generally 3B and SS are rotated less than the other players.
(C) During the weekly friendly games, everyone plays the same--except the SS and 3B, who sit out more.

I feel my job as a coach is to teach. I'll teach as long as the kid is willing to stay out there. As a result, every kid I ever had could bunt better than 95% of the other players at a tournament, could field a ground ball, could catch a pop-up or fly ball, knew how to throw and knew how hit the cut-off man, and knew how to run the bases. If a kid can do that at a reasonable skill level, there is no reason the kid can't play.

As to the question, "Should you stay or should you go?" First, go talk to the coach. Try to find out his reasons. Sometimes, coaches make mistakes. The good coaches will listen--it may not change anything, but they will listen.

If he says, "This is it. She isn't going to play anymore." Then, you should factor that into the equation as to whether to stay or go.

Ray
 
Jun 6, 2009
240
0
My DD plays LL as well.
Pitches and 3rd base ... but 14 kids on team and equal play so she doesn't get enough time there either.


I am wondering if I am justified in my feelings ... but I do realize the areas where she is weak...
play weaker teams should put in the four who get very little time but doesn't.

Pitcher #3 plays 100% as she is catcher / 1st base....pitches a little less than my DD, is no where near the level my DD is (my DD pitches 1st 4 of game we are 6-0, puts #3 in 5th and she walks 5 and the score is now 6-4, then puts #3 back in inning 6, we are now up 6-5, puts in #1 to finish)
(walked 8 in game this weekend)
(my DD generally walks 0-3 in 7 innings, similar to #1 stats as far as walks)


At some p[oint we will have to find a venue for her to hit ... it will notg et better unless she is given time and patience.
Others have been given a lot of chances ...
I do the stats keep the book....

talking to him is not useful as he considers it a challenge/insult ...


It sounds like to me you have made up your mind. The qustion is what does dd say ? IF you guys are in agreement then the decsion is easy. I have pretty much always been of the opinion that you must do what you think is in the best interest of your dd. The best TEAM is not necessarily the best PLACE for your dd.
 
May 9, 2008
432
0
Hartford, CT
DD unliked?

Lack of play time started with 1st scrimmage.
Players told that if they didn't come to practice, no field time in scrimmage...three players missed 2 of 3 practices on a weekly basis...my DD missed none for months...my DD sat 4 of 7 innings .. the above three played entire scrimmage.

Been sitting pretty much all games, sometimes entire weekends.

Although she is my DD and my view is probably "rose colored" ... I do realize she has work to do...
but all this sitting has resulted in deterioration of skills and ends up with her sitting more ...a nasty cycle...

I kind of made up my mind ... would stil like to to work it out if possible ...
but I'mnot that optomistic about it.

Last two weekends she has said to me "I'm done with this" ...

LL Tournaments start and she will play a lot more for that team ... hopefully we can bring skills back up.
Between both she will be practicing 5x per week and LL games she is the primary pitcher...she will get more infield practice in LL...

Travel has 4 more weekends ..two are away and we are thinking of not going....$400-$500 each weekend to sit ... not sure we want to spend it if we aren't staying anyway.

Difficult as we are not the "give up" types...but it really does seem as though she would not be missed ...
although director wants her pitching more...the coach is the one at the games.
 

obbay

Banned
Aug 21, 2008
2,201
0
Boston, MA
Hitting- I highly recommend getting a jugs net, a tee and a bucket of balls. Also get a couple dozen golfball sized whiffle balls. Get her lots of practice swinging the bat, hitting off the tee and soft toss with the golf balls. One-arm swings help a LOT. Do it year round. Not as much in the off-season (don't overdo it) but enough to keep her on track.

I'd find another team. Based on what you've said, sounds like DD would benefit more from a weekend at home, maybe hit the batting cages. I don't advocate quitting, but I do advocate "stopping the bleeding". I think the experience could actually be hurting your DD. That coach sounds like he would bring in another pitcher over your DD rather than recognize her paying her dues.

My DD was in a similar situation this season only it was in LL. ( I whined about it in another thread) She moved up to Senior League (U16) and has been getting less and less playing time. She is a good hitter has a strong arm, in the field plays 1B well, catches pretty good, but all other positions she's inexperienced and needs work.

The coach has treated her like the worst player on the team, now she is.

The playoffs start this week. She likes the team and wants to stay with it. I am over my anger and am working on rebuilding her skills and confidence. For the first time, I will actually hire a coach to work with her to improve her fielding skills and restore her confiidence.

Funny thing is, this was THE team we wanted her to be on. We were afraid that another team with less desireable teamates or coaches would get her in the draft. I have found that it's more fun to play for a team that doesn't win all the time but appreciates you than to ride the pine for a "winning" team.
Best of luck whichever way you go.
 
May 9, 2008
432
0
Hartford, CT
Coach Dislikes

I was angry for a while ... more confused and kind of resigned to the fact that this isn't the place for her at this point.

She has this weekend off (no tournaments and she is going away with town friends) Skipping Travel and LL practices Fri Sat as well....

She chokes at the plate .... decides too late to swing ...
We do T work in basement back yard, have all that set up . probably not enough practice, but we do what we can as we are not here much with 3-4 practices during the week and 6-8 games every weekend.

She can catch fly balls w/o too much problem .. infield pretty good...better than average arm. When she tried out for Travel she made 5 teams...so although I'm "rose colored viewed", she isn't awful...certainly deserving of play time.

She will play a lot in the LL Tournaments ...especially with the pitching changes this year. She is the #1 pitcher on this team.

She generally walks less than 3 batters per game...most hits are pop and infield grounders off her (mostly right side) ...a high end team would pound her, though.
She is a hard working, not necessarily athletic, kid with a really good attitude. With some attention and time on the field she would have grown much more. She really tries and she is capable of more.
She may not go to a D1 school (only 13 so who knows what he future is) but she has not been given the time and chances that others have been given.

One kid got hurt, back too early, parents medicating so she can play...not hitting, dropping balls, but she is playing every game all game ...

Life isn't fair....DD has to learn that....she will have to work harder to make a 13U (watching teams here that should not be a problem).
We knew she wouldn't play all the time, but we did feel that they lesser experienced/skilied players would be played when possible and since even when we are ahead by 10+ runs, they still don't get time ... it is only about winning ...
 

obbay

Banned
Aug 21, 2008
2,201
0
Boston, MA
Does she choke at the plate in LL too, or just in Travel? If it's only travel may be the more advanced pitching.

If it's LL too, I think it's just that she needs a lot more bp. take her to the batting cages and use a speed that she can hit. Then give her a lot of practice at that speed. get her used to hitting the ball. It may take a few visits, but it will come.
then continue to reinforce it with more.

When she feels more comfortable, try the Bonds Drill - have her take a step closer to the machine (without changing the speed). as she adjusts to that, take another step closer, etc..
 
May 9, 2008
432
0
Hartford, CT
Hitting choking at plate

She chokes in any real pitching situation.
Pitching hasn't been that great in Travel .... we've seen some slow pitchers, some average, some fast.
My DD is better than average pitching ....
............ top 33% of what we have seen so far.

Batting practice every week ... hits machine fine ...
I agree that more is needed...
not disagreeing with that at all....

But real pitching is something she needs .....
swings late .. mostly because she is afraid she will swing at a ball and not a strike (travel screams at them if they do that)(more hesitant now)
Lets strikes go by too...

Our first year travel...learned a lot about what we want and need versus what we don't ....
Told my DD that it was a learning experience ...don't leave unhappy, just think about what she/we will look for in her next team now that we have this season to compare.


The coach is skilled technically....but he is mean spirited and so insecure that he can't allow a loss to develop his players for future. Has to 6-0 in evey tourn or it is a failure ...
they are afraid to make a mistake ...

He thinks he is preparing them for future ...but I disagree that young girls should think it is OK or normal to be screamed at by males ...
they are just rolling their eyes and mumbling under their breath at this point ...

Still trying to figure out if we just leave now...should we spend $800 to go to 2 Tournaments just to sit there ...
Hate to be jerks ...
should I talk to the guy above coach .... he likes my DD and has been very supportive ...

At this point I'd just say why we wouldn't come back as it just doesn't seem like a good match ... site some examples ...
 

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