"Bully" coach or are we over reacting.

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Aug 19, 2015
1,118
113
Atlanta, GA
It happens, and it's a tough situation to deal with. Hopefully you know a coaches methods before you make the commitment! There's one in our area, a high level D1 coach who also coaches TB for HIS organization. And this guy is an excellent coach, and VERY well connected! He's Hell on wheels, you better have very thick skin before you even think of playing for this guy!

I don't know your coach, but I promise I'd put my money on the coach I'm taking about! You'd think this guy has a permanent bullhorn somehow attached to his throat, loudest human being I've ever heard!

There's a big difference between being loud and shaming girls on the field in front of parents, the other team, and teammates. That is not any way to improve performance, especially in a teenage girl. Also, there's a big difference between wanting to perform well for the coach because you respect him and being terrified to screw up because you're expecting to be dressed down loudly at a game.
 
Jul 29, 2013
6,782
113
North Carolina
There's a big difference between being loud and shaming girls on the field in front of parents, the other team, and teammates. That is not any way to improve performance, especially in a teenage girl. Also, there's a big difference between wanting to perform well for the coach because you respect him and being terrified to screw up because you're expecting to be dressed down loudly at a game.
I absolutely agree! I later posted just what a great coach this guy is, but he's beyond tough to play for! And you being from Georgia, I'd just about bet you've seen this coach before?
 
Apr 20, 2018
4,581
113
SoCal
I love when these type of coaches fail. Hate when they secede. Was watching a game (2nd year 12u) with a buddy and the HC is coaching 3rd. Count is 2 and 0. Third pitch FB and batter fouls it straight back. 2 and 1. Next pitch is a screw ball in on hands which batter gets jammed and checks her swing for a called strike. HC takes a few steps towards the batter and bellows loud enough for every body within 100 yards to hear, "If you are just going stand there and you don't want hit, I got 4 girls on the bench that do." FIrst base coach (another loser) walks towards her and piles on, equally loud "You have been warned, this is your final warning". I tell my buddy "she going to strike out on a ball way off the plate in the dirt." Sure enough she goes down swinging on an ball in the dirt. BTW this was the first inning of a pool game.
This team had to very good pitchers that carried them to pgf (didn't go far) but team completely disbanded and coach doesn't have a 14u team this year. Thank God.
 
Jul 16, 2008
1,520
48
Oregon
It's always amazing what parents put up with because they think it's "coaching".

No the coach shouldn't be making anyone cry. That is not coaching.

Just from experience, sometimes it doesn't take much to have that happen. I never say anything about errors, missed plays in front of the team, I pull them off to the side and talk to the player. Showcase this past weekend, our LF dropped a routine flyball, let 2 drop in front of her, and let a foul drop (this was in 1 inning). I pulled her off to the side and said we cannot allow the other team additional outs. You need to try and catch those balls. Ummm yeah she started crying... I didn't even raise my voice at all....
 
Jun 27, 2018
291
28
Had a coach like this last year. First year 16u. I should have expected it when at our first team meeting he vowed to work in his anger management. He would curse at the girls. He would outright yell at them. He yelled at my daughter once at practice (catcher) that if she called that play in an actual game it would be a s**tshow. Made her feel completely stupid. This was a PRACTICE. Last Fall when she first joined the team she had a batting average of .600 with a slugging percentage of .800. By the Spring she couldn’t hit a beach ball due to him messing with her swing and getting in her head. She was constantly afraid of failing. He called her swing a “preschool” swing. She goes to a hitting instructor who is proven and he is teaching her at this point a pretty advanced swing. He also told her last Spring she should give up catching because “it will not get her into college”. I believe this was to make way for some of his friends kids to come and join the team this year. He wanted my daughter to basically become a DH. He said this was her path to college. (Remember this is the guy that called her swing a preschool swing). Anyway, now she is playing on an 18u Gold team as a catcher and thriving behind the plate. Her hitting thankfully is coming back as well. And she’s very happy again. Her confidence has returned.


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Aug 27, 2019
640
93
Lakewood CA.
I love when these type of coaches fail. Hate when they secede. Was watching a game (2nd year 12u) with a buddy and the HC is coaching 3rd. Count is 2 and 0. Third pitch FB and batter fouls it straight back. 2 and 1. Next pitch is a screw ball in on hands which batter gets jammed and checks her swing for a called strike. HC takes a few steps towards the batter and bellows loud enough for every body within 100 yards to hear, "If you are just going stand there and you don't want hit, I got 4 girls on the bench that do." FIrst base coach (another loser) walks towards her and piles on, equally loud "You have been warned, this is your final warning". I tell my buddy "she going to strike out on a ball way off the plate in the dirt." Sure enough she goes down swinging on an ball in the dirt. BTW this was the first inning of a pool game.
This team had to very good pitchers that carried them to pgf (didn't go far) but team completely disbanded and coach doesn't have a 14u team this year. Thank God.

This sounds just like her coach except he doesn’t have backup from AC’s (they are both pretty cool).


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Jun 11, 2013
2,619
113
I don't even know what the issue is? You have an adult embarrassing you kid over and over and you wonder if you should leave? I wouldn't let a teacher do this to my kids, I wouldn't let boss to this to my kids.
 
Aug 19, 2015
1,118
113
Atlanta, GA
I absolutely agree! I later posted just what a great coach this guy is, but he's beyond tough to play for! And you being from Georgia, I'd just about bet you've seen this coach before?

We may have had this coach before, LOL! Our coach last year started out being encouraging, but tough. But by the end of the year, he was screaming and blaming girls on the field, throwing temper tantrums in the dugout about bad calls, and telling his girlfriend/the team manager, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!" while he was in the middle of raging in the dugout in front of the girls (she was telling him to sit down and calm down).
 
May 17, 2012
2,804
113
Just from experience, sometimes it doesn't take much to have that happen. I never say anything about errors, missed plays in front of the team, I pull them off to the side and talk to the player. Showcase this past weekend, our LF dropped a routine flyball, let 2 drop in front of her, and let a foul drop (this was in 1 inning). I pulled her off to the side and said we cannot allow the other team additional outs. You need to try and catch those balls. Ummm yeah she started crying... I didn't even raise my voice at all....

This is a great point. Teenage girls can cry if the wind changes direction.

This has been my experience as well and another reason I don't single out individuals by yelling at them or demeaning them. They will beat themselves up without my help.

Now yelling at the team of teenagers occasionally to get their attention that is another matter.
 
Last edited:
Jul 14, 2018
982
93
HC takes a few steps towards the batter and bellows loud enough for every body within 100 yards to hear, "If you are just going stand there and you don't want hit, I got 4 girls on the bench that do." FIrst base coach (another loser) walks towards her and piles on, equally loud "You have been warned, this is your final warning". I tell my buddy "she going to strike out on a ball way off the plate in the dirt." Sure enough she goes down swinging on an ball in the dirt.

As a pitcher, DD loves this. The one she hears most often is a coach getting on his players: "This girl throws everything over the plate, you better be swinging!" That's her signal to throw three eye-high fastballs. Easy out.
 

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