Attitude

[ATF_Butcher]

well having 3 10 year old pitchers would be outstanding, but the all star team scooped up all of them from our park. they took 5 of the 6 pitchers our park has. we have to result to 9 year olds.

thanks for the info halskinner and ang4yanks.

 

[coachkoot]

Our U14 team also has a problem with attitiude. We have a pitcher that is a reasonable pitcher, but only wants to play that position or second base which she would be third on the talent list. Even when she plays second, she doesn't appear to "try" very hard. Her mother is the manager of the team. I questioned the head coach (I am an assistant) and his repsonse was that this was her effort level. Other girls on the team are noticing this and are getting really miffed at this girl and it is disrupting the chemistry to the point where they question their own motivation if a player that gets the most playing time, pitching and other positions, doesn't have to give 100%. I guess if you don't try, you don't make mistakes. It's very disheartening, as a father of a pitcher on the team and an assitant coach of a great bunch of girls who want to win, to see their desire dwindle.

 

[ATF_Butcher]

boy it really went south saturday. we started my daughter in the last game and that really made little miss attitude mad. little miss attitude being the one this story is about. the problem is we only had 9 players for this tournament. so i couldn't bench her. well her first at bat she just stood there with her bat on her shoulder and watched 3 strikes go by. i was so furious i could have exploded. i didn't say anything. well two outs and she was next batter. she hits a dribbler to first base and gets out. the umpire calls ball game. she walks to the dugout and slings her helmet as hard as she can. it bounces off a pole and hits one of the girls right in the shin. i had enough. i told her that that was completely unaccaptable. i told her in a stern voice to go and apologize. she walks over and say sorry in a very mean way. i told her that she was acting very unsportsman like. she fires back at me that she doesn't care. i told her that was apparent. well while the little girl is squatted down in the dugout that got hit her moms runs to the dugout screaming. her mom is a pretty big lady by the way. i am gald she is on my side. anyway when little miss attitude gets back to the dugout she packs her things and leaves the dugout. the mom of the fallen child is screaming at the girl and the mother. the mother doesn't do anything to little miss attitude. not even telling her what she did was wrong. our season is over and i will never pick this girl up again. the thing is there was alot of other coaches from our park there and seen this.

she is so very talented, but her talent is not seen because of her attitude. it is a sad thing.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

Hi. Does your DD have a pitching coach? The elbow shouldn't be under much strain and I was wondering about her delivery. Is she snapping her elbow?

 

[madskilz]

Okay - so here is the real deal with Little Miss Superstar....

1. Mommy is continuously telling her that she is a superstar.
2. Mommy is telling her that she is the best player on the team
3. Mommy is telling her that only reason the team wins is because of her pitching and that the team can't win without her.
4. Mommy tells her that this team sucks and the coaching sucks and that she will never play on this team again. "It's not your fault honey, the team really sucks and no matter how good you pitch, they will screw it up"...
5. Mommy tells her that she is the next Jenny or Cat and that she is the only person on the team that has a shot at going to ASU or Florida of Alabama.
6. Mommy tells her that she could play for any team she wants because she is so good. "Honey, all of the good teams want you. Just watch what they do when you quit."

Do you see the pattern?

And how do I know this - because I went through this very thing when I was coaching 10U ball. The bottom line is that if Mommy isn't onboard with you, you can't fix the problem. And it sounds like Mommy knows everything.

My advice - dump her. She and her mother are a "cancer" that will eat away at your team and your organization. That will send a message to her and the rest of your team that you mean what you say. Your club will go on and will be successful - keeping in mind that success isn't just wins and losses, but developement of your kids.

Rest your daughter. It's just softball. It doesn't mean a thing compared to the health of your child. She will appreciate it as well.

For what it's worth.

 

[Magglio36]

attitude and the mental game

Hello everyone,
I read this post with a lot of interest. The team that I play on has two pitchers, myself being one of them.

"The problem is when she starts to walk a few batters or the defense makes a few errors she blows up and gets a horrible attitude."
Walking a batter or even two is inevitable, it is going to happen. It happens at all levels of baseball including the pros. The most important thing that I have to remember as a pitcher is to keep my composure whatever happens. It is sometimes easier said than done.
During one game, I got myself into a bases loaded situation about which I got frustrated. I realized quickly what I was feeling and that getting frustrated would be the beginning of loss of composure. I had to get myself back in the game mentally, being focused and ready for the next batter. What I am getting at is attitude determines performance. Going back to the bases loaded situation, I had two ways I could have responded. I could have let my frustration get the best of me, which could have resulted in another walk or something that wouldn't have helped the team, or I could allow myself a moment to get focused again and face the next batter with determination to get the out that I need. The end result, my attitude was one of determination (postive) rather than frustration (negative) and my attitude determined my performance. This is true when defense makes errors too. It is going to happen during a game.


"She won't listen to me or the other coach. I try to calm her down, but it is almost impossible. "
The team manager recognizes when I am losing composure and he is there to help, advise, calm me down, whatever I need. However, the manager/coach can only do so much. She has to make a decision for herself recognizing that her feelings are getting the best of her which is not helpful to the team and have ways to calm herself. Part of baseball is "failure." Things are going to go wrong and when things do go wrong is when attitude is most important. Attitude determines performance.

<"I want to ring her neck sometimes. What do I do? Should I bench her? The problem with putting her in the feild is she pretty much gives up on softball all together after she falls apart. I have tried to be positive with her, but she blocks everything I say out. When she strikes out or gets out on the bag she walks back to the dugout. I put my hand out to give her five and she walks past me. It is driving me crazy. >"
Seems as though she may be getting down on herself too much. A pitcher does have a lot of responsibility, however, part of that responsibility is how you are to yourself. She has a responsibilty to the team and to herself. If she allows herself to let her feelings get the best of her, than the end result is falling apart.
One of the many things my pitching coach has told me is "the most important pitch is the next one." There is an awareness of what is going on around you, where your baserunners are, whether or not you are ahead in the count of the hitter....Those things are an awareness, but not what is going to "control" you. Let me go back to the bases loaded situation I referred to earlier. I was aware that I was in a bases loaded situation and I was aware of happened to get us there. However, that did not change my attitude to negative even though I was in a tough scenario. I was able to focus on the next pitch and ended the inning without damage done by the other team.
Instead of thinking about the negative, focus on the positive. One of the things I find myself doing if I am in a negative mode is I think back to something postive happening (ie: the last strikeout of a hitter) and I keep that in my awareness telling myself that I can do it again. All the best.
Lori

 

[madskilz]

You sound like a very level headed "team player". I don't think we are talking about a "team player" here but rather an individual. This type of player and parent will completely dismantle a team in no time. I've seen it happen, and nobody wins.

 

[CoachB25]

ATF, REST YOUR CHILD! She is done and so, it is up to the other girls. Regarding the spoiled pitcher, she can be handled by "I feel statements" such as young lady, I extended my hand and you were disrespectful, I feel you really want to be taken out of the game. THEN DO IT. Young lady, you are upset and disrespectful to your teammates. I feel you think you are better than them and so, need to come out of the game. While this may seem harsh, it shows that your opinions on her actions have value and she'd better learn to get in line. Otherwise, you are winning by losing. In other words, you might win the game but are losing the child. JMHO!

 

[ATF_Butcher]

Hi. Does your DD have a pitching coach? The elbow shouldn't be under much strain and I was wondering about her delivery. Is she snapping her elbow?

Yes she does. i am not sure if she is snapping her elbows. i will pay attention to that and let you know.

 

[CoachKevin]

I also had a similiar experience with a 10 y/o player (this one wasn't even a pitcher). At her last tournament we only had 9 players. She flipped out the attitude again (after SEVERAL talkings to during the year), I called time.... removed her from the field and finished the game with 8 players. We even took the out everytime her at bat came up. She wasn't invited back the next year.