Are you really prepared to play college softball?

[Orange Socks]

I was on a Facebook thread for parents at DD’s school. Its similar to this with parents seeking advice or sharing experiences. I liked it for the comedy. There was a big thread about the cafeteria not being opened for breakfast and lunch for kids returning from break early. Many seemed to think their kids were incapable of finding food for themselves for a day. Another was a Mom was distraught over where her son could find a haircut in a town of 35k people. Not just looking for a good place. Her concern was he couldn’t get it cut! Not saying you’re like this. I just found it funny how I’ll prepared some kids are for the real world. You’ll see a lot of similar issues of softball players not being ready.

Yes!!! I am on similar group for my DD's school. Total comedy. One parent was so worried last that her kid wasn't getting hydrated enough and she was going to drop off a case of water at his dorm. Are you kidding me? I decided to pile on this group of hand wringing parents. I said what did we do 25 years ago when water bottles was not a thing? Did we fall out in the middle of quad walking to class because we were dehydrated? Aren't there water fountains in every building on campus? I think our kids know how to find water. I posted this video. I killed that thread as it dried up withered away.

 

[justanotherguy]

To add: I would spend the money on a reputable private test prep tutor instead of those boot camp, test masters type of one day deals.

Honest question, where would I even find one?

 

[Cannonball]

I would have her take those tests immediately. You need to see a base line to see where she stands so she can set goals. This will also help you determine how much academic aid could be available. I cannot stress this enough. Every college coach I talk to asks about scores. Does not matter what division they coach. Many kids think their kids are High Academic until those scores come back. I have a kid on my 18U team that is really interested in a local D3 program in which the coach really likes this reciprocally BUT her ACT score is 8 pts away from being a realistic recruit. To add: I would spend the money on a reputable private test prep tutor instead of those boot camp, test masters type of one day deals. I totally wasted my money on those. The real progress is going private and you should consider it an investment that will yield big returns.

We had the dd take the ACT four times. The difference of 2 points was $10,000 at one university. We did the ACT coaching at a local place where 2 were in a session. It was good money spent.

 

[Cannonball]

Honest question, where would I even find one?

The guidance counselors at your HS should know of some.

 

[_MIA_]

We had the dd take the ACT four times. The difference of 2 points was $10,000 at one university. We did the ACT coaching at a local place where 2 were in a session. It was good money spent.

All the emphasis these schools still place on standardized test scores is silly imo. Your DD wasn't any less prepared to excel in college when her ACT score was 2 points less. My roommate freshmen year has a perfect SAT score but barely made it past the first year...good kid, smart as hell..not fond of studying..LOL!!

 

[chinamigarden]

There is so much more to college then HS it can't be described. One persons experience will be 100% different then her roommates. This forum obviously focuses on the softball team aspect, and some people remind you that the academic side is tougher. Well to everyone who thinks that their kid having a 3.9 GPA and a 30 on the ACT means the school side will be easy, you might be right or you might be wrong. Often times the best HS academic is in over her head at college, she had skated by her whole HS career on a great memory and intellect. But those alone won't do it in college. Does she know how to study? Does she know how to research? Does she know how to ask for help and who to ask?

Then you have to ad in the extra household stuff. Does your dd know how to do her laundry? Does she know how to sew on a button? Can she feed herself? Manage her money? If you do all of that now, who does it when she goes to college? And no the answer it not you. She has to know how to live without you, otherwise she will be home much sooner then you expect.

Adversity? Can she handle sitting the bench? Can she handle her first failed test? Can she figure out how to balance her life?

Social opportunities? Wow there are thousands of people around your DD every day. Which ones are suitable mates, which ones are looking to take advantage? Which ones might break her heart? How can she deal with that if you have always managed her social calendar? If you are one of those dads who frowned on dating in HS. How is she going to handle a man who has been dating for years when she never learned how to fend off the clumsy advances of a boy, she has not developed defensive methods. Its like never letting your DD hit off of live pitching and then sending her to college go hit in D1.

My DD was #1 in her class in HS, varsity in 3 sports and played in the band. She was the busiest kid in school, we were certain college would be a breeze. She made the engineering program at her university and after 3 weeks she was certain that she would be tossed out of the program due to grades. She didn't know how to study and research. She never had to to succeed at HS, so these weren't tools she had. Plus she didn't want to ask for help because she didn't do that, other people asked her... Long story short she turned it around and worked it out. However her program was chock full of students who were academic stars in HS. By the end of the first semester 2/3rds of the freshman in her program had dropped out of the engineering classes. And full disclosure, my dd didn't play on the University team, she played on the Club team, 2 practices a week and triple headers on Saturdays. Plus a couple of weekend tourneys. Much more free time then most of the college bound softball players will have.

College is hard, don't take your eye off any aspect of it or you will lose all of it. If your dd is a stud athlete, make sure she also has some experience in the other aspects of life. It is more important then you might think.

 

[_MIA_]

My DD was #1 in her class in HS, varsity in 3 sports and played in the band. She was the busiest kid in school, we were certain college would be a breeze. She made the engineering program at her university and after 3 weeks she was certain that she would be tossed out of the program due to grades. She didn't know how to study and research. She never had to to succeed at HS, so these weren't tools she had. Plus she didn't want to ask for help because she didn't do that, other people asked her... Long story short she turned it around and worked it out. However her program was chock full of students who were academic stars in HS. By the end of the first semester 2/3rds of the freshman in her program had dropped out of the engineering classes. And full disclosure, my dd didn't play on the University team, she played on the Club team, 2 practices a week and triple headers on Saturdays. Plus a couple of weekend tourneys. Much more free time then most of the college bound softball players will have.

The thing about engineering is that many kids just choose that major because they are told they can get a good paying job when they graduate (which is true in many cases) instead of actually choosing it because they love to problem solve, etc (not saying that is your child, just my observations as an Associate Professor in Aerospace Engineering). If you don't enjoy the subject it makes it really hard to bear down and study at 9 PM on a Friday night when the rest of your friends are out partying...

 

[chinamigarden]

The thing about engineering is that many kids just choose that major because they are told they can get a good paying job when they graduate (which is true in many cases) instead of actually choosing it because they love to problem solve, etc (not saying that is your child, just my observations as an Associate Professor in Aerospace Engineering). If you don't enjoy the subject it makes it really hard to bear down and study at 9 PM on a Friday night when the rest of your friends are out partying...

I imagine that is true in many programs.
My DD was always busy in HS so she was forced to schedule and keep organized to get things done. College felt like she had more free time so she started to put off things. But she worked that out fairly early. She is in her final year of a 5 year program, she will graduate next summer with a bachelors in Electrical engineering and a Masters in Biomedical Engineering.

 

[Strike2]

There is so much more to college then HS it can't be described. One persons experience will be 100% different then her roommates. This forum obviously focuses on the softball team aspect, and some people remind you that the academic side is tougher. Well to everyone who thinks that their kid having a 3.9 GPA and a 30 on the ACT means the school side will be easy, you might be right or you might be wrong. Often times the best HS academic is in over her head at college, she had skated by her whole HS career on a great memory and intellect. But those alone won't do it in college. Does she know how to study? Does she know how to research? Does she know how to ask for help and who to ask?

Then you have to ad in the extra household stuff. Does your dd know how to do her laundry? Does she know how to sew on a button? Can she feed herself? Manage her money? If you do all of that now, who does it when she goes to college? And no the answer it not you. She has to know how to live without you, otherwise she will be home much sooner then you expect.

Adversity? Can she handle sitting the bench? Can she handle her first failed test? Can she figure out how to balance her life?

Social opportunities? Wow there are thousands of people around your DD every day. Which ones are suitable mates, which ones are looking to take advantage? Which ones might break her heart? How can she deal with that if you have always managed her social calendar? If you are one of those dads who frowned on dating in HS. How is she going to handle a man who has been dating for years when she never learned how to fend off the clumsy advances of a boy, she has not developed defensive methods. Its like never letting your DD hit off of live pitching and then sending her to college go hit in D1.

My DD was #1 in her class in HS, varsity in 3 sports and played in the band. She was the busiest kid in school, we were certain college would be a breeze. She made the engineering program at her university and after 3 weeks she was certain that she would be tossed out of the program due to grades. She didn't know how to study and research. She never had to to succeed at HS, so these weren't tools she had. Plus she didn't want to ask for help because she didn't do that, other people asked her... Long story short she turned it around and worked it out. However her program was chock full of students who were academic stars in HS. By the end of the first semester 2/3rds of the freshman in her program had dropped out of the engineering classes. And full disclosure, my dd didn't play on the University team, she played on the Club team, 2 practices a week and triple headers on Saturdays. Plus a couple of weekend tourneys. Much more free time then most of the college bound softball players will have.

College is hard, don't take your eye off any aspect of it or you will lose all of it. If your dd is a stud athlete, make sure she also has some experience in the other aspects of life. It is more important then you might think.

Lots of good points here. Playing college sports is hard. Living away from home for the first time is hard. College-level academics are hard, and STEM is harder. The wisdom of sending 18yo kids far from home to "sink or swim" while trying to manage all of this is questionable and, at a minimum, involves significant financial risk.

While I'm sure that SOME college athletes sucessfully manage a STEM workload, that's unusual, and probably unrealistic for most. Combine that with now having to live on their own, and there are many likely areas of failure. I've seen my share of kids who went off somewhere because that's where they thought they wanted to go boomerang right back home. More often than not, their parents didn't have their own "college experience" out of HS and didn't know what they didn't know. They get lost in the desire to see their DD continue to that "next level" and fail to see the minefield ahead. While this kind of failure usually isn't the end of the world, it's not what anyone wants, and it will cost tens of thousands of dollars to get the kid back on track.

For some, playing college sports is a realistic way to pay the bill. However, there are trade-offs in terms of available study time and even opportunity cost. Will going to that far off college to play a sport result in an extra year (or two?) to get through school? How much debt with they have? Will the degree be worth anything at the back end? I know of a player who was probably the best HS infielder in the state who graduated from college with a degree that pays fast-food wages. If your DD really has the grades and scores to get into a good university and study something worthwhile, she probably can get a significant portion paid for on the academic record alone. Living expenses at many schools are as much as the tuition, fees, and books. If the kid can live at home, at least for awhile, the savings are huge.

 

[justanotherguy]

The guidance counselors at your HS should know of some.

I appreciate your enthusiasm. LOL. My DD goes to an online school. It was totally reformed at the hand of the govt this summer. It's now so bad my DD is very seriously considering going back to her crime ridden hell hole of a local school system. NO ONE will answer any call or email from me. When it was owned and run by a for profit institution it was awesome. Now that the govt stepped in it's unreal how bad it is.

I'm going to ask my local home school Facebook group. Hopefully some will know.