A very special hitter:

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Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,854
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On this site, I have mentioned a few times that I have a very special young lady who hits with me. She has a ton of home runs this year and her average is really high. In fact, recently she has been intentionally walked a bunch and area coach have decided that she they will never throw her a strike. This young lady is tall and very strong. As important, she is fast and really in shape. She is a multiple sport athlete and qualified for our middle school in track as well as a sprinter.

This morning, we got an early start with her hitting. Her mom wanted me to give her a lesson before their next middle school state game. During the session today, some really troubling stuff happened. This young lady is unlike many of her teammates and other players in general. She spends so much time practicing. She is so driven. As we worked on her "flaws," she said to me that she will never be any good. She said that she practices so hard and she fails so much. The reality is that she rarely fails. A wake up call sounded in me and I once posted it here about my dd. That is the reason for this thread.

For some players, they can't keep "failure" in perspective. This young lady is not being pitched to and so is now walking. She views walks like she is hurting her team. The more she hit the more frustrated she became today so I stopped at one point and told her I didn't want to yell at her so she needed to take a small break, I would pick up the balls and we would hit some more. That is when she opened up. Long story short, this young lady, and some of the dds here on this site, need to be told that the game does not define them and they can't let the game define them. Home runs do not define her. They have to be told that failure is a part of life but it has to be put into perspective. Losing a game does not mean failure. It means a team lost a game. Making an out is the same or having a bad game. No one is perfect. You can't play the perfect game. In the end, this way of thinking will make the game work and not fun.

I think a lot of us are blessed to have dds or work with young ladies who are competitive by nature. Keep in mind that it can be bad as well. With my dd, I had to be very careful of what I said when she failed. She put so much pressure on herself. We have to tell our dds and the young ladies that we work with that their self esteem can't come simply from the results of a game. They have so many more positive things that they do away from the game. In the end today, I think she left in a better place. I hope so. I want to wrap this up by mentioning that sometime our dds and the young ladies that we work on need a practice like we had today that was more talk, vent, ... than hit. Sometimes hitting the ball is the least of these driven young ladies problems. They need to be told that they are doing well, working hard and that you are proud of them. I made sure to tell this young lady how proud I am that she is one of my kids.
 
Last edited:
May 12, 2016
4,338
113
Thanks for sharing CB. Great perspective on what these young ladies need. My DD is super competitive and had a real issue of getting down on herself when she didn't have a great game. She would go 2-4 and focus on the outs. We had to take a step back from the competitive side and concentrate more on enjoying the game and having fun. In the end, it's just a game. My DD competes just as hard as ever, except now she is more lose and having fun out there. Her game has improved so much. Before every game my last words to her are... "Have Fun!". My father passed away in April of this year. My DD's and I went home to see him when he was sick. He's never had a chance to see her play, so he had a lot of questions for her. The last thing he said to her about playing ball was.. "when you are no longer having fun, it's time to walk away". I think that will stick with her forever.
 
Jun 27, 2018
291
28
Cannonball, this is a great post! You sound much like my daughter’s hitting/catching coach. She has been in that place a few times. Beating herself up. Sometimes at her lessons, when she needs it, he will just spend some time talking to her and try to get her to mentally reset. He is a great coach and mentor, I thank God for coaches like him, and you.


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