DD might have played her last game

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Aug 12, 2014
644
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DD possibly player her last game yesterday after a six year run thanks to a bad coach. She was a freshman last year and played on the JV team last fall. It was the first time they had enough players for JV in several years, so she didn't have to deal with the HC much. She played on the summer team and after having him as a full-time coach she decided it's not fun anymore.

HC is very good at teaching the game but has very bad people skills. The varsity went to state the last two years, but seven players graduated this year. The summer team had two of the returning varsity players, four players that he specifically recruited (from within the school) because they are good athletes, and about 12 girls from the JV team or who never really played before. (Of the JV players, DD was the only one who had any experience prior to last season, but she is not an athlete at all, so he doesn't see much potential in her.) The league they played in was not a very high level - they went undefeated and most of the games were run-ruled because one of the varsity players is a very good pitcher.

So you'd think this would be a great opportunity for him to give the inexperienced players a lot of playing time to get some experience, both in practice and the games. But no. At practices, DD said he spent most of the time with the varsity players and the hand-picked recruits, and hardly any time with the rest of the girls. Then in the games, those players played just about every inning, leaving three or four spots for the other 12 players to share. The pitcher pitched every inning except he started DD in one game and she pitched into the third. On top of that, he is one of those coaches who constantly yells and criticizes players. He gets mad at them for not knowing things that they've never been taught or practiced.

DD said she had a big knot in her stomach at every game, and "I shouldn't be scared of my coach." So she decided she wasn't going to play this fall, but she did finish the summer season. I hate that she's stopping because of a coach, but I understand. I see him at the games and I wouldn't want to play for him either. Maybe there will be a coaching change and she'll give it another shot next year, or decide she misses it enough to put up with the coach. But if not, it was great run. I got to coach her for a few years and we both had a blast.

In making lemonade of lemons, since she's not playing I decided to start coaching again, and she's going to be my AC. We're taking a 10U rec team. Practice starts in 10 days :)
 
Last edited:

Bax

Jun 28, 2018
6
0
PNW
But if not, it was great run. I got to coach her for a few years and we both had a blast.

In making lemonade of lemons, since she's not playing I decided to start coaching again, and she's going to be my AC. We're taking a 10U rec team. Practice starts in 10 days :)

I love this part. I hope you and your DD have a blast together like you did before.
 
Oct 1, 2014
2,218
113
USA
This whole thing (except for the last part about coaching again and with your DD) makes me both sad and angry. There is way too much of this happening. A friend just texted this morning that a former HS and Comp Ball Coach in our area was trying to return to coach a lower level team not too far away from us. This "Coach" was so bad that 12 out of 15 Varsity players walked off the field in protest of her antics and lack of knowledge during a practice while she yelled and cursed at them (they went searching for the AD to talk about it) and that previous club season every single player on her 16's team said they would not play for that team again if she was involved in any way. And here she is returning to a 14's team possibly just far enough away that unsuspecting parents will actually pay for the privilege of having this horrible person around their kids. Do organizations or other coaches simply not do any due diligence or research into potential coaches backgrounds? Are people really that naive or clueless about the way softball is played these days that some one can so easily snow them with a load of BS? Are school administrators so shortsighted that instead of investing a little more time upfront and vetting out these bad actors that they're willing to risk having to spend countless hours dealing with the fallout when things turn bad for their students?

I hope your DD is able to find her love for the game again with a coach that understands its about the kids at this age and not about their ego. Their are some out there! Our HS season is just getting ramped up and there is new excitement and hope for these girls who have suffered under a heavy handed, vindictive bully. A clean slate with a new coach will offer a chance to play HS ball with their friends and actually enjoy representing their school in a positive light. As parents of youth athletes we are so often told that our role is to shut up and trust the coaches...well, there are times when that is exactly the wrong thing to do!
 
Aug 12, 2014
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Tatonka, what really annoys me about the whole thing is that he is a really good at teaching the game. His recruits have made a ton of progress, you'd never think they had never played before this season. It helps that they are good athletes to begin with, but hitting as well as they are now comes from coaching. DD really doesn't have much natural athletic ability (she inherited that from me), but she loves softball and is very coachable. She's never going to be an all-conference player (even in our conference where 7 of the 10 first-team were from our varsity last year), but she could become a solid varsity player.

As you said, it's ego. He wants to win, even a meaningless summer league. He only wants to spend his time with the players he thinks will become starters. Of course given some coaching, some of the lesser players could become pretty good, but he won't give them a chance.
 
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Dec 10, 2015
845
63
Chautauqua County
I don't see the problem with the varsity coach. It's varsity and it is what it is. In my mind, the problem seems to be at the JV and modified level. That's where playing time and experience occur.
 
Aug 12, 2014
644
43
There weren't separate JV and varsity teams for the summer season. There was one team with one coach. When he pulled the "favored" players aside at practices, there was nobody coaching the other players. He would just give them drills to do and occasionally look over and yell something at somebody, but the players couldn't even tell who he was talking to.

He ignored 2/3 of the players during most of practice, then yelled at them during games for not knowing things he never taught them. The problem seems pretty obvious to me.
 
Aug 12, 2014
644
43
Here's an update just to show the how ridiculous the coach is. Varsity is 8-6 so far, everyone knew it would be a rebuilding year, but apparently his favored players aren't quite developing like he hoped. DD said he went on the school announcements today and said that he is having an open tryout for a varsity softball player, and added very emphatically "we just need someone who can make a catch and put the ball in play."

There are 12-13 JV players, many of whom played last year and on the spring/summer team. The JV is 3-4 so far after going 0-5 last year. I'm sure there is at least one player there who can catch the ball and put it in play. But he's decided that none of them are worth his time.
 
Jun 6, 2016
2,714
113
Chicago
Here's an update just to show the how ridiculous the coach is. Varsity is 8-6 so far, everyone knew it would be a rebuilding year, but apparently his favored players aren't quite developing like he hoped. DD said he went on the school announcements today and said that he is having an open tryout for a varsity softball player, and added very emphatically "we just need someone who can make a catch and put the ball in play."

There are 12-13 JV players, many of whom played last year and on the spring/summer team. The JV is 3-4 so far after going 0-5 last year. I'm sure there is at least one player there who can catch the ball and put it in play. But he's decided that none of them are worth his time.

Hold on. You're in the middle of the season and he's going on the announcements to recruit a varsity player when there's a JV team? WTF?

This has to just be a really dumb "motivational" message, right? It's his way of telling his players they need to play better? He can't actually think he's going to find someone, right?

I'm sure I do dumb stuff as a coach, but boy oh boy if I ever do anything this dumb I hope the school finds someone else to coach.
 
Aug 12, 2014
644
43
Hold on. You're in the middle of the season and he's going on the announcements to recruit a varsity player when there's a JV team? WTF?

Yes, that's exactly what he's doing.

He's been the HC since 2006, and the school isn't going to replace him because he wins, and it's very unlikely he'll step down on his own.
 

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