Our goals are bigger!

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Apr 28, 2014
2,316
113
Been reading a lot about High School ball and the challenges many kids are having with their coaches.
DD is a freshman and has been working out since mid September with school and tryouts are next week.

DW who is always the voice of reason said something that really resonated with DD today. She said "Why worry about HS ball? You goals are bigger". It took me a little while to understand that one but now that I do, I agree with her.

It reminded me of a quote from Mary Oliver: "Someone once gave me a box of darkness, it took me years to understand that this too, was a gift".

Please tell your DD to keep that in mind ;)
 
Sep 11, 2017
43
6
Seattle, WA
My DDs goals are bigger as well.

To give her everything on the field for her community/city.

To get the program to state for the first time ever. 1 win short her freshman year last year.

To add more all area, and all conference patches to her lettermens jacket.

It drives me crazy all these posts about high school ball this, and that. Get your asses out there and do it for your school. Go put on a show for your friends, for your friends parents, for all the teachers and others in the community that love to watch. My DD plays in only one or two local tourney's for TB per year, the rest are out of state. Its cool that the rest of her family can watch her play during school ball.

My two cents.
 
May 27, 2013
2,353
113
To DD, high school ball is a “stepping stone goal” to reach her ultimate goal of playing in college. Sometimes you need those smaller, attainable goals to help keep you on track of potentially obtaining your “reach” goal. They can help give the player the confidence to say yes, I can do this, so she will continue to push and persevere. I realize some people from other areas/states feel that school ball is similar to rec ball. My area is not like that. Most of the varsity high school teams around here are full of travel team players, and I’m sure a good majority of them feel a sense of pride taking their teams deep into districts and states with the bigger goal of taking their team all the way to the championship game.
 

sluggers

Super Moderator
Staff member
May 26, 2008
7,132
113
Dallas, Texas
The idea that college ball is "softball nirvana" is ridiculous.

There is still a coach who decides who plays and who doesn't. There are still teammates trying to take away playing time. There are still umpires who blow calls. There are "unreasonable" teachers who expect students to come to class. And, there are still psycho parents.
 
Sep 29, 2010
1,082
83
Knoxville, TN
I think there are VERY few circumstances where I would not let DD play HS ball. It’s become “fashionable” to not play HS ball and that’s a shame. Let’s not play the game we love and take BP and infield all spring, because that will get us to college??? Be part of something bigger than yourself. It’s ok if you sit the bench for Varsity your freshman year, you probably will in college too! Play the game! It’s a shame that one of the greatest team sports is becoming a ME sport. Be a leader by “buying in”, others will follow and you may actually have fun playing the game you love!
 
Oct 2, 2015
615
18
The idea that college ball is "softball nirvana" is ridiculous.

There is still a coach who decides who plays and who doesn't. There are still teammates trying to take away playing time. There are still umpires who blow calls. There are "unreasonable" teachers who expect students to come to class. And, there are still psycho parents.

Queue the Metallica song, "Sad But True..."

Great post!
 
Jan 30, 2018
252
0
SE Michigan
My DD is in 6th grade and first year she can play school ball is next year. She wants to play HS ball but not sure about middle school. She wants to try some other sports, which I strongly encourage, but not at the expense of TB softball, her choice. She may decide to try other spring sports like track or soccer or something. She looks forward to playing HS though because her TB teammates are scattered throughout the districts and she will play against them about every game. They already talk smack to each other.
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
113
My DDs goals are bigger as well.

To give her everything on the field for her community/city.

To get the program to state for the first time ever. 1 win short her freshman year last year.

To add more all area, and all conference patches to her lettermens jacket.

It drives me crazy all these posts about high school ball this, and that. Get your asses out there and do it for your school. Go put on a show for your friends, for your friends parents, for all the teachers and others in the community that love to watch. My DD plays in only one or two local tourney's for TB per year, the rest are out of state. Its cool that the rest of her family can watch her play during school ball.

My two cents.

It obviously sounds like things are working out...is your DD getting to play half time on the JV squad, behind players that she regularly crushes on the TB circuit? and if she had to wait two years to get the letter jacket and play varsity would you be as excited. I think there are situations where girls/parents have legitimate grips and it's OK to come to these boards and vent a little. I think girls should play because it really is about school and community spirit but there are situations out there were programs don't really value "new" girls coming in...they have a system and a seniority track and you either get on board or get shown the door or the bench...and the answer for me is always play your best and let the rest take care of itself.
 

ian

Jun 11, 2015
1,175
48
It obviously sounds like things are working out...is your DD getting to play half time on the JV squad, behind players that she regularly crushes on the TB circuit? and if she had to wait two years to get the letter jacket and play varsity would you be as excited. I think there are situations where girls/parents have legitimate grips and it's OK to come to these boards and vent a little. I think girls should play because it really is about school and community spirit but there are situations out there were programs don't really value "new" girls coming in...they have a system and a seniority track and you either get on board or get shown the door or the bench...and the answer for me is always play your best and let the rest take care of itself.

Spot on DJ. Some schools have honest programs. Some schools have bias daddyball programs.
 
Sep 29, 2010
1,082
83
Knoxville, TN
It obviously sounds like things are working out...is your DD getting to play half time on the JV squad, behind players that she regularly crushes on the TB circuit? and if she had to wait two years to get the letter jacket and play varsity would you be as excited. I think there are situations where girls/parents have legitimate grips and it's OK to come to these boards and vent a little. I think girls should play because it really is about school and community spirit but there are situations out there were programs don't really value "new" girls coming in...they have a system and a seniority track and you either get on board or get shown the door or the bench...and the answer for me is always play your best and let the rest take care of itself.
None of these reasons would be grounds for not playing HS, IMO. Like you stated, go play your best. It will work out.

My DD come in to HS having been the starting catcher for a nationally known TB org. The starting catcher position was not laid at her feet when she stepped on campus. Got some time behind the plate in the preseason, played well, but not we’ll enough in the coaches eyes to take a seniors spot. My DD was better defensively, both had an good BA and DD’s was a little higher. It just wasn’t enough to take the spot. DD was upset, but went to work. Got to play some OF which she had never done, played some 2B, DH and eventually got to catch about a fourth of the games her freshman year.

If I would have sat around and griped about the coaches decision, I’m sure it would have influenced her attitude negatively. Instead, I told her to suck it up and give everything you have in practice and assured her it would work out if she worked hard. Sophomore year caught every game on a team that finished second at state tournament. I’m glad I didn’t even think about discussing quitting HS ball because she didn’t get to play her spot as a freshman.

It’s easy to work hard when everything’s going your way, not so easy when they aren’t. Allow kids to build character.
 

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