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Jan 22, 2018
1
0
So my daughter is 11yrs old and has been working out with a 14U team. There were tryouts over the weekend and she made team. Tryouts was with 14U and 16 U and we were happy the ladies were not split up but she held her own.. but then the coach called us and told us because of high school ball one of the other teams will be shutting down and those that don't play HS ball will come over to his team. because of that she might not see a lot of playing time to none at all because of the size of the team and the skill level of the older ladies. The coach told me that because of how hard my 11YR worked and that he see a real talent that she wanted to be upfront with me with the playing situation and that it might be a downer for her just to be practicing but not getting field time. When I ask my daughter her thoughts she said that she wants to stay with the older girls and she understand the situations. There are two teams that wants her to play for them but 12U. She really likes the 14U coach and working out with the older girls. looking for some help and direction.
 
Dec 2, 2013
3,410
113
Texas
Commit to the 14u team for the summer and fall. Play with the 12U team during the spring, but let the coach know what is going on. You will continue to have this problem for the next several years as most older 14U teams will go dark during HS season. Another route would be to find the most competitive 12U team within a good organization and play with them. My first thought is that either your DD is the best 11 yr old in your area or the team that she is trying out for is not that good and needs players. Also, I don't really like the idea of an 11 yr old potentially playing with/against 15 year olds. There are a lot of dugout conversations that an 11 yr old shouldn't be a part of.
 

WARRIORMIKE

Pro-Staff Everything
Oct 5, 2009
2,815
48
At the Jewel in San Diego
play with a good 12u team where she will get play time. Ditch the ego and bragging to friends that "my daughter plays on a 14/16U team at 11" Yes the conversations are more mature, and she may get better, but sometimes that atmosphere can be poison too. Let her shine at her division.
 
Sep 29, 2014
2,421
113
The adage you will hear on this board all the time is your daughter needs to be on the best team that she can PLAY for....that does not mean the best team she can MAKE and subsequently sit on the bench.

I think if your DD is really good enough to make a GOOD 14U team she should be looking for the BEST 12U teams in the area and trying to make those teams.

Honestly I think this coach did you a HUGE favor and was very upfront basically letting you know your DD is good enough to MAKE the team but when HS season is over she is NOT good enough to PLAY.

I can't tell you how many times we have heard stories on this board of the exact opposite player and parent are in the dark until March 15th when coach lets everyone know next practice is June 1st and good luck on your HS season except your DD is an 8th grader wondering why she is not practicing when everyone else is and the parent is calling the coach wondering what's going on.
 
Last edited:
Mar 28, 2016
164
18
Commit to the 14u team for the summer and fall. Play with the 12U team during the spring, but let the coach know what is going on. You will continue to have this problem for the next several years as most older 14U teams will go dark during HS season. Another route would be to find the most competitive 12U team within a good organization and play with them. My first thought is that either your DD is the best 11 yr old in your area or the team that she is trying out for is not that good and needs players. Also, I don't really like the idea of an 11 yr old potentially playing with/against 15 year olds. There are a lot of dugout conversations that an 11 yr old shouldn't be a part of.

Completely agree. And the 15 year-old's will be annoyed that they have to keep their conversations in check whenever your DD is around.
 

jjr

Jun 13, 2017
69
8
I'm not sure an 11 year old would enjoy riding the bench all season, and you as a parent as well paying dues and whatever other expenses that pop-up.

She may say she understands now, but a season can wear on a young girl, especially if she only gets 1 inning every tournament. That's not even taking into account when she may not play at all because of the level of competition the team may face for any given tournament. There is a huge difference (unless your kid is a really, really early bloomer) between an 11 yo physically and mentally. What makes it even harder is when she is finally put in and makes an error or strikes out, she may not have another opportunity to redeem herself (because girls do think this way) and will break her confidence after a few times.

Then again, only you know your kid and her disposition. I, personally, wouldn't have her playing 14u. There is nothing wrong, imo, with keeping your kid in her age group until she ages out. If anything, if the player is that good, it will only bring her confidence up more AND have her performing even better at 14u.
 
Jan 22, 2018
7
3
The biggest problem is HS girls lives are very different than your DD age. They will be discussing things that you or your daughter may not be ready for her to be apart of


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Nov 18, 2013
2,255
113
If I read this correctly its temporary and just for the HS season. Most of the older girls will be playing HS ball and it's the younger girls who are left.

If so, it sounds like a no brainer. Your DD likes the coach and players and understands the situation. She gets to play a couple months with more experienced girls and see directly what it will take for her to reach that level. She goes back to her team a better player when the HS season is over and shines all summer.
 
Jun 16, 2015
65
6
Just my .02: DD started out 13 playing on a 16U. She's been 3 years at 16U. Has she learned a lot? You bet. Did she play much at all? Not nearly enough. Although we were for the most part happy with all that she was learning, and happy with the coaching, it has been a constant bone of contention that she sits the bench behind the older girls. Your DD should play where she will get playing time. Props to the coach for communicating with you about her prospective playing time. Good luck!
 

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