Dealing with team's diamond diva

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softgabby

Gear Empress
Mar 10, 2016
1,073
83
Just behind home plate
I have been meaning to post about a situation that happened Sunday night. But, I was too upset over what happened. Then, I meant to post this last night. But, I was too bogged down with homework to be able to come on here to post.

OK, onto what happened. Sunday night, we were playing in our conference's championship game in a round robin tournament to end our fall season. We were playing the best team there, winning 7-6 in the bottom of the 6th. Our pitcher allowed a single to open the inning, got a pop-up to third to record the first out, struck out her next hitter then allowed a single on a throwing error that pulled the first baseman off the bag. We called time and coach came out and talked to all the infielders at the circle. We started with the next batter. On the 7th pitch of the at bat, the hitter hit a bloop single over the second baseman's head into right center. Runner at third scores. Throw comes to short while runner comes around third. The throw goes six inches over my glove while second runner scores. Runner that was at first comes around third. I'm at the backstop while pitcher comes home. I underhand the ball to pitcher to record the last out. We high five and run back to the dugout. I bat second in the inning and pop out. We end up losing the game. Understandably, were upset and we congratulate the other team. At the team meeting, the shortstop decides to blame me for the loss. She cusses me out and calls me out for not participating in throwing drills from my elbow tendinitis plus demands I apologize to the team.

What's the best way to deal with this diva? Safe to say, I really vented after this.

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Jun 11, 2013
2,619
113
All you can do is give it 100 percent each and every time. No one loses a game on their own or wins a game on their own. You don't have to apologize for anything.
 
Feb 20, 2015
643
0
illinois
You win as a team and lose as a team. You should not apologize for anything, nor should you have to fear being called out by teammates during a team meeting. Coach (I am assuming coach was there) should have immediately squashed any such talk.
 
Aug 29, 2011
2,581
83
NorCal
Obviously the throwing drills were not that effective if you have 2 IF throwing errors in the inning leading to both runs scored. But that's just me being snarky.

As IL softball points out team game and coach should have nipped that in the bud right away.
 
Oct 3, 2011
3,478
113
Right Here For Now
If your coach didn't step in immediately and stop this, then by now, you should know that more than likely, he's willing to have the team being divisive. Many coaches believe that teams that are divisive will be more competitive since they will constantly be working harder to avoid this type of situation in the future as well as competing harder for their starting spots. In reality, most of those teams have a 100% chance of imploding since many of their best players won't play for them again when the season's over due to the drama. If you want to continue on in this situation, fine. Personally, my DD would have said something along the lines of, " I didn't make that throw you did. My chest is here (pointing to her chest) and my mitt was here (illustrating where her mitt was), if you can't make an accurate throw, it's not my fault I can't grow an extra foot in a few seconds!" Needless to say, this has caused a lot of dissension amongst some past teammates but they got over it or left.

I'll never forget a Diva pitcher on one of our past teams. She was all over the place, with little control that game and it didn't help that the HP umpire had an extremely small strike zone. Now you have to understand, my DD's Forte' is framing/receiving. The pitcher came in after the second inning and said to DD, " Can't you frame better to get me strikes?!" DD replied, " If you threw strikes, I would!." After the season was over, her dad gave the HC an ultimatum, either my DD goes or his DD does. Bye-bye pitcher.
 
Nov 29, 2009
2,975
83
Where was your coach when your SS decided to open her mouth? Who made the throwing error that allowed the winning run on the bases? That's who lost the game for you. Who made the throw over your glove? How many errors were made previously in the game that allowed runs? Your team should have been out of the last inning with one runner left on base and no runs scored.

As for handling the diva. There are two ways. The first is to ignore her and let it go. See if she apologizes for her comments. Sometimes people say stupid things when they are upset. Or you could make comments on every error she makes. And there will be plenty. If you do that you'll end up creating tons of drama on the team. So I would advise against that.
 

softgabby

Gear Empress
Mar 10, 2016
1,073
83
Just behind home plate
You win as a team and lose as a team. You should not apologize for anything, nor should you have to fear being called out by teammates during a team meeting. Coach (I am assuming coach was there) should have immediately squashed any such talk.

Thank you, Il. I know we win or lose as a team. I know I didn't make the errors in question. I usually don't fear being called out. I'd rather be called out if I made a mistake that cost us a game or even if we win and I make a mistake that I shouldn't make. Coach was there and he did try to get her to stop and did tell her he'd bench her for her comments especially when she started cussing me out for something I had no control over. It's not like I could have jumped any higher to get to the ball.
 
Jun 27, 2011
5,089
0
North Carolina
Thank you, Il. I know we win or lose as a team. I know I didn't make the errors in question. I usually don't fear being called out. I'd rather be called out if I made a mistake that cost us a game or even if we win and I make a mistake that I shouldn't make. Coach was there and he did try to get her to stop and did tell her he'd bench her for her comments especially when she started cussing me out for something I had no control over. It's not like I could have jumped any higher to get to the ball.

Sounds like the coach handled it. I would hope and expect that he carried through with his promise to bench her.

Have any teammates supported or defended you?
 

softgabby

Gear Empress
Mar 10, 2016
1,073
83
Just behind home plate
If your coach didn't step in immediately and stop this, then by now, you should know that more than likely, he's willing to have the team being divisive. Many coaches believe that teams that are divisive will be more competitive since they will constantly be working harder to avoid this type of situation in the future as well as competing harder for their starting spots. In reality, most of those teams have a 100% chance of imploding since many of their best players won't play for them again when the season's over due to the drama. If you want to continue on in this situation, fine. Personally, my DD would have said something along the lines of, " I didn't make that throw you did. My chest is here (pointing to her chest) and my mitt was here (illustrating where her mitt was), if you can't make an accurate throw, it's not my fault I can't grow an extra foot in a few seconds!" Needless to say, this has caused a lot of dissension amongst some past teammates but they got over it or left.

I'll never forget a Diva pitcher on one of our past teams. She was all over the place, with little control that game and it didn't help that the HP umpire had an extremely small strike zone. Now you have to understand, my DD's Forte' is framing/receiving. The pitcher came in after the second inning and said to DD, " Can't you frame better to get me strikes?!" DD replied, " If you threw strikes, I would!." After the season was over, her dad gave the HC an ultimatum, either my DD goes or his DD does. Bye-bye pitcher.

I wish I could have posted more on my initial post but my tablet was dying. Coach did step in when our shortstop was ripping into me. He did end up telling her he was going to bench her for her outburst, cussing me out and undermining the team. We do try to work hard without starting drama and having what happened Sunday night. When she was ripping into me for not participating in the throwing drills for two weeks I said to her "it wasn't my fault that the runner reached base. It wasn't my fault our first baseman was pulled off of the bag. And it wasn't my fault the ball went over my outstretched glove when I jumped. I did my job by running to the backstop and underhanded the ball to the pitcher and keep us from being down by two runs! If there's anything else I can do...I'll ask coach, he will tell me". She has caused a lot of dissension within our team. I'm also not the first person she has called out. I'm just the first one she has called out in front of the team. She has called out teammates on socal media. She has called out pitchers when we lose. She has called out teammates when they didn't get a hit in a critical situation. There is just so much other trouble she has tried to start up. But she isn't the most reliable person to have on defense. She will get to a lot of balls. She has good speed and will dive for balls. But her arm is very inaccurate.
 

softgabby

Gear Empress
Mar 10, 2016
1,073
83
Just behind home plate
Where was your coach when your SS decided to open her mouth? Who made the throwing error that allowed the winning run on the bases? That's who lost the game for you. Who made the throw over your glove? How many errors were made previously in the game that allowed runs? Your team should have been out of the last inning with one runner left on base and no runs scored.

As for handling the diva. There are two ways. The first is to ignore her and let it go. See if she apologizes for her comments. Sometimes people say stupid things when they are upset. Or you could make comments on every error she makes. And there will be plenty. If you do that you'll end up creating tons of drama on the team. So I would advise against that.

Hey, Sparky Guy. Our coach was there heading up the team meeting where she decided to do this. He said about benching her. She was the one that made the initial throwing error. She is the one who threw over my glove. I know she made at least 4 errors in the game and I know she made at least 10 errors that were either scored as errors or were careless mistakes that could have been avoided. If she could have gotten the ball in the vicinity of the bag, I know we would have won the game 7-6 instead of losing 8-7. But I'm going to let it go. It's not worth it.
 

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