Dealing with gay/bi players

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May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
Just want to add that it is laughable to compare drama between two teammates who are dating each other with drama from a teammate who is experience boyfriend trouble.

IMO, it's a big mistake to make broad generalizations about the emotions of personal relationships. FP26 had some good examples of how "boyfriend trouble" can be every bit as disturbing to a team as a relationship between teammates that goes bad.

When it's time to play ball, play ball. If something is getting in the way, it needs to be dealt with in a manner that is appropriate for that specific situation.
 
May 6, 2015
2,397
113
Hmmm? are you saying one is more impactful than the other?

Shouldnt they both be treated equally as far as a conversation towards standards of no drama/dating issues on the field?
Example
Your boyfriend cheated on you.
Dont cry at practice.
Your girlfriend cheated on you.
Dont cry at practice.
The reprecussions of emotions are the same.


there is a little bit of a difference when the one who cheated on you is 15 feet away for a good deal of the practice / weekend.

I agree with those who are saying no PDA during team activities (and if travel is involved, this is anythime any third party associated with the team is present), same as if a BF was at a game.
 
Feb 20, 2020
377
63
Hmmm? are you saying one is more impactful than the other?

Shouldnt they both be treated equally as far as a conversation towards standards of no drama/dating issues on the field?
Example
Your boyfriend cheated on you.
Dont cry at practice.
Your girlfriend cheated on you.
Dont cry at practice.
The reprecussions of emotions are the same.

How about:

Your girlfriend, who you cheated on, is getting ready to throw a hard object at you at 55mph?
or
Your ex girlfriend, who broke up with you two weeks ago even though you begged her not to, is talking about her new crush in the dugout?
or
Even though your girlfriend of a few months isn't out with her parents yet, you couldn't stop yourself from giving her a kiss after a game winning homer because you're so happy for her?
 
May 24, 2013
12,461
113
So Cal
How about:

Your girlfriend, who you cheated on, is getting ready to throw a hard object at you at 55mph?
or
Your ex girlfriend, who broke up with you two weeks ago even though you begged her not to, is talking about her new crush in the dugout?
or
Even though your girlfriend of a few months isn't out with her parents yet, you couldn't stop yourself from giving her a kiss after a game winning homer because you're so happy for her?

Your ex-boyfriend cheated on you with one of your teammates. Now they're dating, and the teammate is talking to others in the dugout about how awful you treated him.
 
Dec 26, 2017
487
63
Oklahoma
How about:

Your girlfriend, who you cheated on, is getting ready to throw a hard object at you at 55mph?
or
Your ex girlfriend, who broke up with you two weeks ago even though you begged her not to, is talking about her new crush in the dugout?
or
Even though your girlfriend of a few months isn't out with her parents yet, you couldn't stop yourself from giving her a kiss after a game winning homer because you're so happy for her?


Is it really any different if you replace ex-girlfriend with “The girl who’s boyfriend cheated on her with you is getting ready to throw a hard object...”?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Feb 20, 2020
377
63
I think those are both a LOT less visceral than actually seeing/being the person in the relationship and dealing with it. Even seeing the person who your SO cheated with is different than seeing the person who actually cheated on you. You're devaluing the emotions of the girls involved by assuming they are equivalent to friendship, when most romantic relationships are much more than that.
 
Dec 26, 2017
487
63
Oklahoma
I think those are both a LOT less visceral than actually seeing/being the person in the relationship and dealing with it. Even seeing the person who your SO cheated with is different than seeing the person who actually cheated on you. You're devaluing the emotions of the girls involved by assuming they are equivalent to friendship, when most romantic relationships are much more than that.

I suspect that for 16-18 year old young ladies, having to see and deal with the person who "stole your boyfriend" (especially if there was "cheating" involved), the experience would be PLENTY visceral and hurtful. If this is just a race to get to what's worse, this is all pointless. There are PLENTY of examples that have been given that may not bethe WORST, but that are plenty hurtful/bad enough to cause real issues on a team. Continuing to move the goal posts makes this look a lot less like genuine concern for team chemistry and more like someone just thinks it's "icky".

Is this really a thing that you expect to be so common and SO problematic that teams should have special rules that apply to homosexual players, as opposed to the suggested "No PDA/No Drama" rule that applies to ALL players anyway?
 

2br02b

Trabant swing
Jul 25, 2017
303
43
There was a local team where a girl was booted for sending a DM to a team-mate saying "Go kill yourself", because she thought they both liked the same boy...

None of this is easy.
 

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